Sugar Grove
by Kayleigh Cullen1918
Summary: Edward Cullen returns to his home town to take over as the local Sheriff. He expects the place to be quiet and boring, just what he needs after his stressful job in the city. What he finds is Isabella Swan. When she was 16 Isabella's boyfriend murdered her family in front of her and she has been a recluse ever since. Can the local Sheriff tear down some of her walls? M For safety.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N Hi guys! Yes, I am back, but this story has been screaming at me to be written down for the past few days and I knew that this had to be the next story I uploaded. I hope you like the first chapter! Please review and let me know!**

**EPOV**

I pulled up in the middle of the towns square and grinned. Sugar Grove, Virginia. It hadn't changed a bit.

I had grown up in this small town. I had dated the high school cheerleaders and thought I ruled the world. When I was old enough I had left, swearing never to return and had moved to Chicago to take a place in the police department. Now I was back and though if you had told me seven years ago I would have thought you were crazy, I was happy to be home.

I got out of my truck and strolled along the streets until I came up to the diner where I had spent most of my teen years.

I grinned when I saw the small woman behind the counter.

"Edward!" Mrs. Cheney called out as I took a seat on one of the many stools.

"Hello there, beautiful," I greeted her with a kiss on the cheek, which caused her to blush.

"When did you get home?" She demanded.

"About five minutes ago?" I grinned.

"Does your mamma know your back?" She asked with a frown.

"Yes. She would skin me if I came into town without telling her." I laughed.

"Too true," She agreed as she poured me a cup of strong black coffee that could put hair on your chest. "I heard you were coming home. Sheriff, huh?" She asked with a raised eyebrow.

I couldn't help but laugh. Nothing got passed anyone in this town.

"Yeah," I drawled. "I intend to clean up the bad streets of Sugar Grove," I teased as I added four sugars into my coffee, ignoring her disapproving glance.

"Why don't you grab a seat while I get you some food," She suggested. "Usual still the same?"

I smiled. "Cheeseburger with everything on but the kitchen stove."

Mrs. Cheney laughed as she shooed me away.

I took a seat in a booth by the window, one I had sat in a lot over the years with my best friends Jasper Whitlock and Emmett McCarty and Alice Brandon. The four of us had once been inseparable and I was looking forward to getting that relationship back.

"Well, well, well," I heard a sultry voice drawl and looked up to see Tanya Denali sitting next to me. A little too close.

"Tanya," I greeted with a nod. Way back when Tanya and I had a thing, something I regretted since the night it happened. Tanya, however, had not and had always expressed a desire for a repeat. Not happening. I stopped thinking with my dick after that night. Waking up to Tanya Denali had shocked me into changing my ways.

"When did you get home, Sheriff?" She all but whispered as she pushed out her impressive chest.

"About five minutes ago," I answered, keeping my eyes on hers.

"That's good," She replied.

"So, what's new in town?" I asked, trying to change the subject and I stirred my coffee.

"Oh, please, nothing changes in this town. Oh, some chick who was in the news a few years ago moved to town about three months back. Really weird," She drawled as she fluffed her strawberry blond curls.

That got me turning back to her. "Who?" I demanded.

"Umm... Isabella something," She shrugged.

"Isabella Swan?" I demanded.

Her ice blue eyes widened. "I didn't know you knew her."

"I don't," I replied honestly. I didn't know her, but I knew of her.

At sixteen years old Isabella Swan had been a normal teenage girl until her boyfriend had broken into her house in the middle of the night and murdered her family in front of her before trying to kill her. The media had declared the fact that she lived a miracle. I had been extremely interested in her case and had even looked into it when I joined the force. While it had given me a lot of details, no one ever really knew what had happened since Isabella had been hospitalized by her aunt a week after it had happened. She had claimed that the young teen had become violent and suffered from hallucinations. Then, after two years, she was released and no one had seen anything of her since. Until now.

"Have you spoken to her?" I asked, trying to sound casual.

She rolled her eyes. "No. Why would I? I know that a lot of people have, though. They say that she's a freak. Apparently, she works in the library for free!" She exclaimed.

I frowned, not liking her words. I knew that she didn't need the money, her parents had been extremely wealthy and everything had been left to Isabella when they had died.

I nodded my head slightly as Tanya started to ramble on about the past six years of her life. I barely paid attention. My mind was on Isabella.

* * *

I didn't know what had posessed me to come here. I really didn't.

I walked into the town's only library. It was run by Mrs Elizabeth Tucker and always had been. She was in her late seventies now and you could tell she had been a looker in her day. I had seen pictures of her, tall, blonde, blue eyes and big breasted. I'd always wondered why she had taken a job in the boring old library than go somewhere with more people. She'd always just said she liked books more than she liked people.  
I myself had never liked the library. Mainly because I did like people and the place was almost always as empty as a graveyard. It was just too quiet and too creepy and too... dusty.

When I heard laughter, I knew by the throaty chuckle it was Mrs Tucker. I followed the sound hoping Isabella would be with her. Unless she'd finally lost it and was laughing to herself.

I wasn't sure why I was searching the creepy old library, looking for Isabella, I just knew I was.

I rounded the corner and there they were.

Mrs Tucker looked exactly the same as she did the last time I was in town. Her hair was long, white and loose, her face creased with the years and a little more rounder than she had once been.

The woman next to her had to be Isabella.

She had to her back to me, so I couldn't see her face, but I could see that she had long, dark brown hair, flowing down her back in glossy curls. The last picture I'd seen of her she had blond, straight hair. I liked her style now much better.

From what skin I could see, she had ivory skin, like she didn't go out in the sun that much. She was around 5'4, maybe shorter, and man; she had curves that were hotter than hell.

She had some sort of green sleeves blouse on, I thought it might be called a camisole, and a short denim skirt. She had bangles on her wrist and from what I could tell she kind of had the whole hippie look down. Yet, I'd never liked that look on girls before and I liked it on her.

When she laughed, my breath caught, it was like music.

I made my way over to the women, thinking that Tanya didn't have a clue what she was talking about. This girl seemed friendly and welcoming.

As I walked over to them, Mrs Tucker walked away laughing.  
"Dream on, Bitch," She chortled.

I was somewhat shocked my Mrs Tuckers choice of words, but I was more interested in the young woman in front of me. This close I could smell her hair. Apples.  
"Good afternoon," I greeted in a friendly tone.  
I could have kicked myself when she jumped and twirled around so fast it mad my head spin. Her hair had almost whipped me in the face.

I saw a flash of fear in her eyes.

She was beautiful! Big brown eyes and full soft pink lips.

Wow, was the only thought that came to mind.

I noticed how her expression switched from startled fear to skittish. Like she was unbearably uncomfortable.

"Hi," I smiled trying to make her feel a little more comfortable. Considering her entire body seemed to have tensed up, I got the feeling it wouldn't be happening anytime soon.

"I'm Edward Cullen." I hoped my name would be familiar to her. I didn't see any sign of recognition in her eyes and I was trained to notice such things.

She muttered something that was too low for me to catch.

My forehead creased in confusion. "Excuse me?"

She just shook her head as if to clear it.

"Nothing," She answered, looking anywhere but his face and shifting uncomfortably.

When she bit her lip, all my blood rushed south.

Changing the subject and trying to ignore the lust that had just shot through me, I said, "Well, I just came in to introduce myself. I'll be starting work at the Sheriff's office tomorrow."

She nodded.

I didn't know why her apparent lack of interest made me want to smile.

"And so," I continued holding back a smile, "I thought since we were both new in town, maybe you'd like to get together for dinner sometime?"

Her eyes met mine for the first time and my heart stopped.

"Like- like a date?" She asked, clearly anxious for some reason.

"Well, yeah," I smiled. "I'm not exactly new in town, I grew up here," I explained. "I meant to say that I've just came back," I lied. It had just been trying to find a way to ask her out. It had seemed like a good idea at the time. Now I wondered whether she thought I was a liar or just a moron.

I didn't know why I was so unsure of asking out a woman all of a sudden. Normally I was charming. Smooth. I'd never been a ladies man, but I wasn't a monk. Now I was nervous and second guessed myself. What the hell was that about? When had I even made the decision to ask her out? I had come here to talk to her, not date her.

I had a feeling the answer was Isabella. She was more beautiful than any woman I'd ever met and for some reason I loved how strange she seemed.

She continued to stare into my eyes for a moment.

"No, thank you." She answered abruptly, yet oddly polite.

Then without another word, she turned and walked away.

That Eman song came into my mind.

I watched her walk away and since I was of the male species, I couldn't help but notice the sway of her hips. She moved with such grace.

"Well, that may have been the politest rejection I've ever had," I mused to myself.

"Edward Cullen," a voice barked and I flinched when I recognized it as Mrs Tucker.

"Hello Ma'am," I greeted with a sheepish grin.

She walked up to me, her steps slower with age. Yet, she still walked as she always had, head up, shoulders back. She had more confidence than ten women.

"The last time I saw you in here you were checking out _'Dracula'. _You never returned and neither did my book." She bit out as she glared at me.

Dracula, shit, I thought. I'd forgotten all about that.

I'd checked it out when I was fifteen. A girl had come to town for the summer with her parents. She was pale with black hair, black lips and looked like she hadn't slept in weeks. I thought she was amazing... until she dragged me into a cemetery at two in the morning to perform a séance. Yeah, I'd soon gotten over her.

What still pissed me off to this day was that she had been the one to dump me claiming I was just another sheep, following the herd. Well I'd rather be a sheep any day.

"I am so sorry Mrs Tucker." I apologized for something that happened thirteen years ago. "I'll pay for the book."

"Don't play around with her, Edward." She warned and it took me a moment to realize who she was talking about.

I smiled gently. "I have no intention of playing around with anyone." I reassured her.

That didn't mean I had no intention of getting to know Isabella. There was something about her.

"The last thing that girl needs is another person around here treating her like she's some sort of act in the circus." She told me sharply.

"Wait, what do you mean?" I asked with a frown. Had people treated her that way? My fists clenched at the thought. Tanya had told me what the town thought, but I didn't think Isabella knew.

"Men, women, children. All with small town minds. They treat her either like a freak to be ignored or talk about her like she's some alien. They all want details of what happened or to just stare at her. Why do you think she spends her time between here and the Sparks' place? She doesn't want to be stared at or talked about. She doesn't want to be talked to, for that matter. She just wants to be left alone." She fumed. "She's a nice girl, a little skittish around you at first, but that's just because she doesn't know you. That poor thing has been through enough. More than anyone in this town and they'd do well to remember that. "

I was shocked. Not only by the town, but by Mrs Tucker. I had never heard her voice so fiercely protective. Obviously she had taken a liking to Isabella.

"I have no intention of doing any of that, Mrs Tucker. You know her Mother and mine were friends. I just want to get to know her." I promised.

"So, you don't want to date her then?" She challenged.

I grinned. "Well, yes, but I won't hurt her. There's just something about her. I won't treat her like a circus freak. I won't put up with anyone else doing it, either."

"Edward, I'll be honest with you," She spoke in a gentle voice, one I had never heard before. "What she needs right now, is a friend. Someone her own age. Hell, even a nice boy like you who can take care of her." She winked and I was slightly taken aback in shock.

Mrs Tucker's actions only confirmed what I had already thought. Isabella was special.

"Then that's what I'll be. For now," I added with a smirk.

I wasn't sure why I found her skittish behaviour adorable. I just did. I didn't know why I was so determined to spend time with her. I just knew I needed to. I also didn't know why when I had seen her my heart had stopped. I just knew it had.

My instincts were telling me she was special, different. I always listened to my instincts.

With a quick goodbye to Mrs Tucker, I strolled out of the library, humming along to the song playing in my head. _Wonderfully Strange_.

**A/N So, there you have it, the first chapter of Sugar Grove. Which, by the way was named after the town it's set in due to a lack of creativity on my side, lol. If anyone has any ideas for a better name, let me know! In the next chapter we will see a Edwards family and maybe even a little from Bella herself!**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N**** Hi guys! I am so sorry that this is late! I was going to post last night, but I watched The Pact and boy is it hard to type sun and sweet scenes about my favorite people when someone's crawling out of the floor or swinging around like a fan! Please read and review. **

**EPOV**

"Mamma!" I growled as I picked her up.

"Edward!" She squealed as her feet left the ground and she struggled until I set her on her feet. "What are you doing?" She laughed as she hit me with a wet dish towel.

I pulled her into my arms. "I just missed you these past few years, that's all."

Her smiled softened as love filled her eyes. "I missed you, too. So did your father."

I started putting away the dry plates as we talked. "He still at the hospital?"

She sighed. "Yes. That man is going to kill himself one of these days. He's running on empty," She frowned.

"That little boy he was telling me about?" I asked softly.

Tears filled her green eyes. "He doesn't have long left. You father is filled with guilt. Like he should be able to save him, but..." She trailed off.

"I know."

Esme Platt had met Carlisle Cullen when he had moved to Sugar Grove when he was sixteen and angry at having to come to what he had called a 'one horse town'. He had resented his parents deeply for making him leave behind his friends in the city. That was until he saw Esme fall out of a tree that she and her friend were fooling around in. He had taken her and her friend to the nearest hospital and fell in love by the time he dropped her off at home.

They had been together ever since.

After Carlisle had graduated from medical school he had returned home and married Esme. A year later, I was born.

"You never told me Isabella Swan had moved into town," I commented, changing the subject when I sensed my mother's sadness. The thought of a child suffering destroyed her.

My mother loved children, she would have had ten if she could, but had gotten uterine cancer, rare for someone of her age and though she had won her battle, she had become infertile. Something that had almost killed her.

My distraction worked, she turned to me with raised eyebrows. "I didn't know I had to." She responded slowly.

I shrugged my shoulders uncomfortably. I had meant to sound casual and take her mind off of the little boy, instead I sounded accusing.

"I just thought it was strange that you hadn't mentioned it. That's all."

She grinned, not believing me for a second. "Well, I didn't see the point. The poor thing came into town a few months back. I doubt she even remembers me," She shrugged.

"I see that the town has already tagged her as the town freak."

"Bastards," My mother hissed, shocking the shit out of me. She never cursed. "That poor girl has been through so much and she comes to this town for a little peace and quiet and gets branded a weirdo because she doesn't want to make idle small talk in the produce section or gossip over the garden fence. She can barely walk through town without people stopping to whisper like she's not even there." She fumed as she scrubbed the hell out of a dish.

"And yet you haven't spoken to her," I pointed out.

She turned to scowl at me. "She want's peace, Edward. That last thing she needs is me turning up onto her doorstep and talking about way back when."

"I take it she's living at the old Sparks house?" I guessed, frowning when she nodded.

The Sparks house was on the opposite side of the lake that was in the back garden and belonged to relatives of Isabella.

"Isn't it a little secluded for her?" I worried.

She turned to grin at me. "She is fine in that house."

"I was talking about the lake and woods surrounding it." I retorted.

She laughed as she tossed her head back. Her long caramel waves flowing around her. "She is safer in those woods than she is in town. I'm betting she feels the same since she prefers the woods."

"I guess," I muttered.

She turned to frown at me. "Why are you so interested?"

I sighed as I leaned back against the counter. "I don't know. I was always interested in what happened to her, that was to be expected considering everything, but today..."

My mom handed me the last dish to be put away. "Today what? Did you talk to her?"

"I asked her out!" I burst out.

She looked at me, her green eyes horrified. "Why would you do that?"

I scowled. "I didn't mean to," I defended myself. "I only went in the library to see her. To see if she was okay, I guess. Then I was talking to her and then I was asking her out."

"Men," She scoffed. "You are all such idiots. What were you thinking? She doesn't even know you. It's your first day back in town," She muttered.

"I know. I'm an asshole. I couldn't help it. She's..." I trailed off, unable to describe a feeling that I didn't understand, but knew I wanted to feel again.

She placed her hands on my shoulders. "Edward, I love you, but you're an idiot. I may not have spoken to her, but it's obvious that she is in no place for a guy, a strange guy who she doesn't know, to be hitting on her. She needs a friend."

"I know, I know. That's what Mrs. Tucker said, but she said no."

"She said no when you asked her out. Why don't you try and be her friend. With no ulterior motives of becoming more than that," She added firmly.

I smiled. "To be honest, I doubt she'd even want that from me. Not after the fact that I had barely said hello before I was asking her to dinner. I must have creeped her out." I growled.

"You think?" She asked sarcastically.

"I don't know, mom. I just saw her and... Something happened. I don't know what, but something changed."

My mom smiled softly. "Well, it's about time," She muttered, waving off my frown with a dismissive hand. "Edward, why don't you try and become her friend first. That's what she really needs and if there is something about her, then give her what she needs." She advised.

I couldn't help but smile at my mother. "You are so smart," I said as I kissed her forehead.

We both turned when the kitchen door crashed open.

"Cullen!" Emmett McCarty called as he pulled me into a bear hug. He had dark hair; dark eyes and most swore he was part giant. Taller than me and muscular, Emmett was a force to be reckoned with.

I grinned back before I was being pulled into another man hug that was strong, but didn't crush the shit out of my ribs.

Jasper Whitlock grinned at me as he ruffled my hair. Blond hair and blue eyes Jasper was a female magnet. Only problem is that he only wanted one woman. A woman who wouldn't give him the time of day.

"Boys," My mom snapped as Jasper pulled me into a head lock.

"Sorry," We all chorused, something that reminded me of my high school years. We had grown up together and they guys spent as much time in this house as I did theirs.

"Sit down and I'll get you boys something to eat," she ordered as she shooed us outside onto the porch table.

"It's good to be home," I chuckled as we dropped into our seats.

"It's about time, Cullen! I've missed you pretty face," Emmett growled as he pinched my cheek.

"Knock it off," I snarled as I leaned out of his reach.

Jasper just grinned. "Seriously, what made you come back? What happened to never returning to this town?"

I shrugged uncomfortably. I had my reasons for needing to return home, but none I wanted to share. "It was just time. So, what about you Jazzy?" I grinned as he flinched at his nickname. The nickname he only let one person call him.

"Don't start," He warned.

"Seriously? How are you and Alice?" I asked, knowing it wasn't good.

He shrugged, sadness filling his eyes. "She still refuses to talk to me. She refuses to believe I exist most days. She sees me in the street and she walks right by me."

I frowned. Jasper and Alice had been together since preschool. While it hadn't been romantic then, they had been the best of friends. As they grew they fell in love and had been each other's first in everything; first kiss, first time, first love. First heartbreak.

Their love hadn't been full of drama, it had been happy. They had always belonged together. That was until last year, a week before their wedding, when someone had told Alice that she had seen Jasper with another woman. We all knew it was bullshit, but Alice had been heartbroken and refused to forgive Jasper. Refused to believe him. None of us blamed Alice, her father had been a horrible man who constantly ran off with other women and returned to her mother saying it was lies. Alice vowed to never be one of those women, to never be like her mother.

Jasper had tried everything to convince her that he would never do that to her, but Alice, in my opinion, was to afraid to believe.

"What are you going to do?" I asked, feeling for my friend and the pain I knew he was in.

Jasper looked at me with a slow grin. "That girl has been mine since I first laid eyes on her in the sandbox; she's not getting away from me."

"You sound like a stalker, bro," Emmett commented making us laugh.

"And what about you, Emmett? Any girl caught your eye lately?" I chuckled.

Emmett groaned. "They're all the same. They're all annoying. They all think they can change me. I don't want to be changed," He grinned.

Emmett loved life and believed in living it to the full. He didn't worry about anything and lived for a new adventure. He was the deputy of the police department and was the one who told me about the position opening up as Sheriff. I got the feeling he knew something had happened in Chicago, he just didn't know what and he didn't pry. He was a good man.

Women tended to want to change him, put a leash on him, but he didn't like to be tied down. Whenever a girl asked for something more, he would say he liked her a lot, but he wasn't into serious relationships. He had told the three of us the truth one drunken night in saying that he knew none of the women he dated was 'the one' and he didn't want to be tied to another woman when he did eventually meet her. We had ripped the piss out of him for being a closeted romantic.

He leaned into whisper, "I got to tell you, celibacy is not for me."

"That's nice to know, Emmett," My mother commented as she placed a large sandwich in front of me.

"Oh, hey, Mrs. Cullen," He blushed.

My mother placed a plate in front of each of us and walked into the house, waving off our thanks and hiding a grin at Emmett's discomfort.

"What about you, Edward? Anyone caught your eye?" Emmett asked as he bit into his sandwich.

"There's someone."

**BPOV**

I was walking along, listening _Stay Stay Stay_, when I heard someone calling me.

I frowned as I glanced around, looking for the source of the voice loud enough to penetrate my music.

I saw Sheriff Cullen waving at me from across the street with a big grin on his face.

I frowned at him before waving back awkwardly and walking away, tense.

The man drove me insane! Every time he saw me he waved or stopped me to chat. Id stand there like an idiot, at a complete loss what to say to the handsome Sheriff. Not like the other women in town, who blushed and batted there eyelashes at him, like I had noticed, I literally had no idea what to say to him.

I rarely spoke to anyone other than Mrs. Tucker and I liked it that way. When I had first arrived in town everyone had tried to make conversation, small town hospitality and all that, but after they realised I wasn't interested in conversation, I became the ice princess who either thought she was too good to talk to the commoners or was a freak to be whispered about while I was in hearing distance.

I couldn't help it, though. I had no idea how to interact with people. I found that after living in Sugar Grove for a week that I preferred the Psych ward.

Mrs. Tucker had eventually gotten me to open up, but that was only because she wouldn't accept anything less and because she didn't treat me like a freak. Everyone knew my story, everyone knew what had happened to me and everyone acted differently around me. She didn't. I loved her for it.

"What am I going to do about him?" I demanded as I hand Mrs. Tucker her coffee as I entered the library, which was dead as usual.

Mrs. Tucker chuckled. "He's only waving at you, there's no harm in that." She pointed out.

I knew that and I felt like a bitch for complaining about a man who was just being nice.

"I know that. I do." I insisted when she raised her eyebrows. "I just don't understand why he won't stop it. It's not like I have been overly nice to him since he arrived in town. I have been a bitch to him. Anytime he talks to me I freeze up and bail at the first chance. I can't help it. Whenever someone talks to me I feel like a deer in the headlights and I just want to run to the nearest secluded area. It's not funny!" I protested as she chuckled in her seat.

"Honey, have you considered maybe he knows how uncomfortable you and is trying to get you to ease up around him? I have known Edward Cullen his entire life, he's a good man."

I huffed. "What do I do? I don't want to be rude to him. I don't want to be rude to anyone. I just want to be left alone." I shrugged.

"You put up with me hanging around you. You talk to me. You don't want me to leave you alone." She pointed out gently.

I smiled. "But that's you. You're my friend."

She smiled and patted my hand. "I think that if you let him, Edward will be your friend too."

**A/N ****There you go! I hope you like it. Let me know!**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N**** Hi guys! I would like to thank you all. I don't know how to explain what it means to open my email and find 50 new messages that tell me that I have you beautiful people now following my story! It made a very bad day much better. Normally only Taylor Swift can do that. Please review and let me know what you thought. **

**BPOV**

I was on my third set of lunges when I decided that the personal trainer on the DVD that I was currently attempting to do was a sadist.

I had never been naturally skinny. Not since birth. I had to work to keep it off. Mainly because my comfort food could feed ten. I ate a lot of comfort food. I think I over did it now because it had taken such a long time to gain my appetite back.

The cat's watched from the couch behind me as I grunted with every lunge and cursed at the television.

I loved my cats. I had named them each after characters from one of my favorite TV shows and had gotten them from an animal shelter in Carolina.

"Move your ass, Bella," I ordered myself breathlessly as I moved onto squats.

After another twenty minutes of pure hell, I cheerfully switched off the television.

I turned around to the cats that had yet to have moved off the couch. "So, dinner and then a shower. What are we having? A healthy salad or... greasy cheeseburger?" I asked with a grin as if I expected them to reply.

I nodded thoughtfully. "Your right. Cheeseburgers it is! I would hate to have actually worked off my daily intake of calories," I admitted.

I picked up the lightweight's that the demon insist I use and tossed them down into the corner, wincing at the thud they made against the hardwood floor.

I sighed as I looked around my home, my haven. It wasn't a large house, but it was more than big enough for me; I didn't like long hallways and too many rooms where anyone could be hiding. Waiting.

The house was an off white with a wraparound porch that had a swing which had to be older than me. More importantly each of the windows had dark shutters that locked from the inside. The front door led into the comfortable living room that showed my feminine tastes, lots of color and lamps. The chairs were deep and comfortable, which I preferred since some nights, when the nightmares got a little too much, I'd come down here, double check the locked doors and windows and then crash on the sofa for the night with the cats and a good book.

The stairs led up to a small hallway and had two bedrooms and a small bathroom. It was strange to me, when I was younger I would have felt suffocated in a house this small, I had been used to large open spaces and every room being able to fit at least five people. Now, the idea of such a large house terrified me, whereas my small house made me feel safe.

When I had first moved to Sugar Grove, the small house that was surrounded by forest had been run down and worn out, but with some love and tender care, and a lot of cursing, it was now the one place where I felt myself. Even though many would be scared of the seclusion and the surrounding trees, I loved it. I didn't mind being alone, it was being around people that I minded.

My head whipped around when I heard a knock at the back door. No one ever visited my house. Not even Mrs. Tucker. My heart pounded and I could feel adrenaline pump through my veins as I walked slowly into the kitchen.

Everything is fine, I told myself. The cat's, sensing my distress, followed me into the kitchen and jumped up onto the counter.

If they wanted to hurt me they wouldn't knock, I thought. Everything is fine.

My hand was inches away when someone pounded on the door.

I jumped away from the door with a scream.

"Isabella," A familiar voice called out. "Are you okay? It's me, Edward Cullen."

It took me a second to connect the dots.

"Sheriff Cullen?" I called in disbelief.

"Yeah." I could hear the smile in his voice.

Forgetting my fear, I yanked the back door open angrily. Completely forgetting that I was sweaty as hell and only wearing a tight tank top and joggers.

"What the hell do you think you're doing? You scared the holy crap out of me," I snapped.

He just stood there, staring at me, his eyes wondering over my body. I was too angry after my scare to be embarrassed.

I had to admit, Edward Cullen was the sexiest man I'd ever seen. Tall and muscular with bronze messy hair and the brightest green eyes I'd ever seen. He had a jawline that could make any woman swoon that was covered in light stubble.

I had to admit that despite being completely taken aback in the library, I was strangely flattered. Ever since I had gotten out of the mental institute I had kind of given males a wide birth. Especially the ones who made it obvious that they wanted something more. I wasn't blind, though! I could see how utterly handsome the man in front of me was. How his smile lit up his eyes. How his hair was the strangest shade of bronze I'd ever seen. How ripped he looked in his dark shirt...

I noticed all of this; I just didn't know how to react to it. Especially when something in me responded to him.

That's what scared me most of all.

It seemed to dawn on the idiot that just maybe he'd done something stupid.

"I'm sorry. I just thought I'd come over and see how you are."

I frowned. His apology seemed sincere.

"Why are you at the back door?" I demanded suspiciously.

He shrugged his broad shoulders casually. "My parents live just across the lake."

I felt my eyes widen. "Are you telling me you travelled across the lake and then the woods at night just to see how I was?" I asked incredulously.

"Yeah," he answered like it was no big deal.

"Why?" I demanded, glancing at my cell phone that was sitting on the kitchen counter. He may be the Sheriff but he could still get arrested.

"Well, I thought maybe we could have a beer and some pizza," he answered.

It was only then that I realised that he carried a six pack of beer and one of those red bags that pizza delivery boys carried. Had he carried those across the woods with him? I guess that's why he bought the bag, so they wouldn't get cold. But did he really expect me to sit there with him eating pizza and drinking beer like we were old friends?

"Why?" I asked, dumbfounded. Why would he even want to do this? Why would he go to all this trouble? I honestly didn't understand.

He grinned and my mouth actually watered. I cleared my throat uncomfortably as I berated myself for being an idiot. Down girl, I snapped mentally.

"I thought we could be friends," he replied. He sounded so sweet and so boyish that I had to stop myself from smiling.

"I already have a friend," I shot back as I tried to hide my reaction.

His grin didn't falter as he tucked the six packs under his arm and leaned against the door frame.

"Well, that's the thing about friends," He drawled and then leaned into to whisper, "You can have more than one." He grinned as he straightened his eyes bright with laughter.

"I have more than one," I bristled, trying not to glance back at the good majority of those 'friends'.

"You're not serious?" He asked in disbelief when he caught the glance. Dammit.

"What?" I demanded.

His grin was back and in full force and if he didn't look so damn cute I would have decked him for it. I felt my cheeks flooding, something that hadn't happened in years. When people tended to look at you like you were batshit crazy, you didn't get embarrassed as easily as you would have under normal circumstances.

"I just thought that maybe you would be interested in having a friend who can actually answer you back when you're talking to them. One with opposable thumbs," He added with a smirk.

I scowled at him. "Having someone answer you back when you talking to them is overrated," I replied pointedly.

"Oh, come on, Isabella, don't you want to be friends?" he teased. He reminded me of that little red devil in the cartoons that sat on the shoulder of the main character and whispered seductive things in their ears.

"Um... Nope!" I answered and slammed the door shut, making him jump back or risk losing a toe.

I turned to the cats with a satisfied smile. "Good riddance and all that, right?" I muttered. I went to turn back into the living room when the yelling started.

"Come on, Isabella! Open the door. I'm really not that bad," he swore. "Just a few beers, something to eat. You must be hungry after working out." He paused for a moment. "You do realize I won't leave until you agree!"

I huffed angrily and whirled around to open the door.

"Were you dropped on the head repeatedly as a child?" I demanded heatedly.

His grin turned into something different. It was this soft crooked smile that could drop a woman at ten paces.

"I like you when you're like this," He murmured. It was almost like he was talking to himself instead of me.

"What?" I snapped, having no clue what he meant.

He cleared his throat. "In the library you were all skittish and uncomfortable. Now you're... wow," he finished.

I blinked. "Okay," I replied.

He shook his head as if to clear his thoughts. "Anyway, I think we could be good friends. And I did tip the pizza guy twenty bucks to keep this... thing," He finished, looking down at the bright red bag.

I sighed as I thought of a way to turn him down.

He held up the pizza bag and smiled. "I had it made so half of the pizza was margarita. Mrs. Tucker told me it was your favorite."

I hesitated at the mention of Mrs. Tucker. Hadn't she told me to give him a chance?

I didn't want to be mean to him and tell him to take a hike after all this trouble, though that's what a big part of me told me to do. The part of me that had kept me safe, and sane, since that night so long ago. The thing is, though he was annoying me, I was actually enjoying myself.

What stopped me from telling him no was his eyes. Though he had an easy smile and bright, happy eyes that shone with laughter, I saw something else in them. A deep sadness. I decided that there was a lot more to Sheriff Cullen than I had originally thought.

It was then I decided that maybe _he_ was the one who could use a friend.

"Fine. Get in and try not to annoy me." I said as I walked away, leaving him to let himself in.

**EPOV**

I watched as Isabella swayed into the house, leaving me standing there, grinning in triumph.

She looked adorable in her workout clothes and long hair that was pulled back into a messy ponytail.

I paused when I saw her 'friends' follow behind her.

"You have three cats?" I asked in disbelief. I had seen only one when she had glanced behind her when she was talking about her friends. Who had three cats?

"Yes. I've decided to become one of those cat ladies early." She responded as she bent to pick up the fat tabby cat.

"Do they have names?" I asked as I followed her into the living room.

I smiled when I saw that books were everywhere, they were on shelves, stacked on the table, and even some were in the kitchen counter. I glanced and recognized a few; my mother was a fan of supernatural romances, too.

"Umm... The tabby is Rory, the ginger one is Sookie and the black one is Lorelai." She frowned at my blank look. "_The Gilmore Girls_." She told me like that was supposed to mean anything.

I just shrugged my shoulders and had to force back laughter at her horrified expression. I found her expressions adorable.

She opened her mouth and the shut it abruptly. Shaking her head she explained, "It's one of my favorite TV shows."

I stored that information away as I replied, "I've never heard of it."

I didn't think her eyes could have gotten any bigger. She turned and walked, well stormed was a more apt description, into the living room.

"Do you want me to get Lorelai and Sookie?" I asked.

"Not unless you want to get clawed," She called out.

I took her advice seriously and stepped around the two cats that followed my every move with their eyes.

"Nice kitties," I muttered.

I swear they rolled their eyes at me.

I placed the pizza and beers onto the coffee table and sat down on her couch. It was really comfortable. The kind that you could crash into after a long day's work and feel like you had just found a little bit of heaven.

I opened two of the beers as she fiddled around with the DVD player.

"I take it you bring your work home with you," I teased when I spotted a bunch of library books that were stacked on the side table.

"They're not all mine," She answered absently, obviously paying little attention to what I was saying.

I glanced behind me and spotted Sookie and Lorelai watching us from the kitchen doorway.

Rory, obviously not a devil cat, came and jumped onto my lap.

"Well, at least you seem to like me," I muttered as I scratched behind her ears.

Isabella came and crashed into the couch. I bit back the smile that threatened to show when I noticed just how much space she had put between us.

"I guess it's just me they have taken an instant dislike to," I muttered when the devil cats came and sat on her lap.

She smiled softly as she ran her fingers through their fur.

"Don't take it too personally. These two don't like anyone. I think the only reason they like me is because I feed them," she laughed. A beautiful sound.

"So what are we watching?" I asked, sticking to the cat I knew liked me.

She smiled up at me. "I am showing you what you have been missing out on. A necessity. A show that I actually tuned my body to wake up at 7:50 AM every morning so I could watch the repeats."

I frowned at her, though I enjoyed the playful look in her eyes.

"What?"

She smiled brightly up at me and my heart almost stopped. "I am showing you the wonder of... _The Gilmore Girls_." She finished dramatically and then turned to press play.

She didn't see my smile.

"Okay then, Isabella, show me what I have been missing." I chuckled as I handed her a piece of plain pizza while I got myself a slice with absolutely everything on it.

She looked up into my eyes. "Bella."

I held down the utter triumph that threatened to overwhelm me.

"Bella."

**A/N**** Well, there you have it. No one can resist the charms of Edward Cullen and his most charming. Let me know what you think.**


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N Hi guys! Wasn't going to put this up until Saturday, but inspiration struck and before I knew it, I'd written the next chapter. I hope you all like it and thank you for your wonderful reviews! ****I'd also like to thank the guest, who wrote the most wonderful review and spoke of how she'd like to trade in her three kids for cats. You are wonderful! And no, men don't get that show, lol**

**BPOV**

"You should have seen him! He pouted for the rest of the night and now refuses to even acknowledge Sookie's existence," I giggled.

Mrs. Tucker and I were enjoying a hot drink on one of the many empty tables in the middle of the library.

Mrs. Tucker threw her head back and laughed. "Well, that will teach him! Next time maybe he'll listen."

"I feel so sorry for him, he's trying to win them over but it's just not happening."

"So, you and he are getting along?" Mrs. Tucker asked, not bothering to beat around the bush.

I smiled. "We are. I didn't think we would." I admitted. "I didn't think I would get along with anyone, especially a man who is one more drop in away from being a stalker, but he's funny and sweet and he's so patient with me."

"He's a good boy," Mrs. Tucker agreed, nodding her head.

"He is. He doesn't complain that whenever we hang out it's always at my house or that I like to keep to myself. He just accepts it," I shrugged, not being able to explain how much that meant to me.

"You like him." She told me.

"I do." I admitted.

It had been two weeks since Edward's drop in visit and we'd pretty much spent every night together since when he wasn't working nor had other obligations. He would come over to my house and we'd watch movies or listen to music. We spent most of the night talking about everything and anything and day by day I found myself becoming more and more comfortable around him. There were sometimes when I'd freeze up, like if I'd had an especially bad nightmare that night or something had happened to freak me out and I'd try and close off. I always expected him to get frustrated and leave, but he never did. He just pushed through it, not allowing me to close off.

He still tried to get me out of the house, inviting me along for a drink at a bar with his friends, but I had admitted that I didn't really feel comfortable meeting all of his friends. He had just laughed and said he didn't have that many friends. He was planning for me to come out one night, just me and him. He teased that he thought I was ashamed to be seen with him.

I liked him. More than I should.

He was just so damn adorable! He played with my cats; he watched television shows he hated because I loved them. He was so kind and compassionate and smart. When I spoke to him, even over the most trivial of things, I knew he was listening. In two weeks he had gone from being a stranger I had no clue how to be around, to a good friend and that was because he was a good man.

Mrs. Tucker nodded her head with a small satisfied smile. "Have you thought about taking him up on his offer of a date?"

I burst out laughing. "Cut to the chase, why don't you?"

She rolled her eyes. "When you're my age, you'll realize that time is precious and you shouldn't waste it. Why haven't you taken him up on his offer?"

I sighed as I traced the grooves in the wooden table. "Firstly, because I don't think the offer is there anymore. Secondly, he's my friend."

"And thirdly?" She asked archly.

I looked up at her sadly. "I don't think I'm ready yet." I admittedly quietly, hating myself because I knew it was true. Hating _him _for still affecting my life after all these years.

I felt Mrs. Tucker's soft hand on mine. "That's okay, honey. It's okay. I just wonder if you think you'll ever be ready. I worry I'm going to be gone one of these days and it will just be you up at that house and in this library and you'll be all alone."

I felt my eyes burn at her heartfelt words. "I'm good at being alone."

She looked deeply into my eyes for the longest moment before speaking. "No. I don't think you are. I just think you're afraid to let anyone in. Especially not a man."

My laugh held no humor. "The last man I let in butchered my family." I answered.

I saw that she had no answer for that.

I looked around, searching for a way to clear the tension. I glanced down and saw that she was playing with her wedding ring, something she did whenever she was tense.

"Do you miss him? Mr. Tucker."

My plan worked, she glanced down at her ring and smiled, the tension leaving her body as quickly as it had come.

"Michael," She whispered. "Every day."

"How did you meet?" I asked curiously as I leaned forward.

She laughed. "Not under the best of circumstances. You see, he was my best friend's boyfriend. Off limits, as you would say," She chuckled.

"Obviously not," I drawled looking pointedly at her ring.

She chuckled and the years faded before my eyes as she spoke of Michael.

"No, obviously not. He came into town, all ready to propose from what she told me. I had never seen him before, just heard about him, so when I bumped into a handsome young man on the street, I didn't know he was taken for." She sighed dreamily. "He was tall and strong with blond hair and bright blue eyes. He smiled at me and I was gone. He had my heart and there was no way of getting it back."

I was shocked to hear the old woman speak so sweetly, so romantically. It was so different to who I had known that it made me sad. This was the woman she was before he died.

"So what happened?" I demanded eager for the story.

"Well, we spoke and flirted," She admitted with a grimace, but her eyes told me she didn't regret it for a moment. "Then we parted ways. I was heartsick at the thought of never seeing him again, but I held out a secret hope that I would. Imagine my surprise when he turned out to be Susan's fiancé," She drawled. "He had proposed the night after I had met him. It broke my heart," she told me. "I saw them together and I knew I could never have him. So, trying to be a good friend, I helped arrange the wedding, I soothed her when she was stressed and promised her a happy life when she worried it would all go up in flames."

"That doesn't seem fair to you," I whispered.

"Hasn't anyone told you? Life isn't always fair."

I smiled at her wise words.

"What did Michael do? How did he react when he realised who you were?"

She chuckled. "He was knocked for six. He later told me how he thought he'd never see me again and was trying to move on and do the right thing, that when he realised who I was it felt like a bullet had hit him in the chest. We tried. We tried to forget and to ignore what we felt. We even tried staying as far away from each other as possible, but it was useless. The night before the wedding, we had the rehearsal dinner, a strange thing if you ask me and he found me crying outside. When he asked me why I was upset I wanted to hit him."

I burst out laughing. That was the last thing I expected her to say and yet at the same to, it's exactly something I'd expect her to say.

"What upset me? Was he stupid, I yelled at him. I shouted saying that maybe he could turn his feelings off and on, but I was having a pretty hard time. That it was me who would have to watch him vow to love another woman for the rest of his life tomorrow. It was me whose heart was breaking while he was drinking champagne and planning his future with her. He just smiled and said that if I wanted to, we could leave right then. We could walk out that door and never look back. That he had tried, but since the moment he saw me, he knew I was the one. That when I'd taken to planning the wedding with gusto, he thought that maybe I didn't feel the same. He took my hand and said 'Let's just go'. It was like the devil himself; trying to seduce me into doing something I knew was wrong, but I couldn't help it."

"Did you leave?" I asked in disbelief. It didn't sound like the woman I knew.

"No. I couldn't just do that to Susan. I knew it would be completely selfish, to destroy my best friend. So I told him no. I told him to go in there and marry Susan because she didn't deserve what we were doing to her." Her voice became quiet as she lost herself in her memories.

"It was that morning when she came to me in tears, telling me how Michael had called off the wedding. How he was in love with another woman. I comforted her, I held her and I hated myself for not having the courage to come forward as the woman who destroyed her relationship."

"So when did you leave to be with Michael?" I asked with a frown.

"I didn't. I stayed with Susan and didn't see him again for a year."

"What?" I demanded. "A year?"

She smiled at me and shook her head. "As much as I loved him, I couldn't do that to Susan. I never expected to see him again. I mourned the loss of him and tried to move on. Susan was engaged within six months to a young lawyer who she married and had children with, but I was still in love with Michael. There could be no one else."

I sighed. "So get to the good parts." I ordered.

She rolled her eyes. "The youth of today, no respect. Anyway, so it was a year after the wedding had been called off, Susan was married and happy and then Michael turns up on my doorstep with an engagement ring. He told me that he'd been keeping tabs on us. He knew of Susan's marriage and there was no longer any reason for us to be apart. I didn't hesitate in saying yes this time."

I smiled at the story. "So he waited a year to be with you."

She nodded. "If he's the right man, he will wait a life time."

"How did Susan react?"

She huffed. "She was furious at the lies and the humiliation that we had caused her. She didn't speak to me again." She shrugged her shoulders.

I felt my jaw drop. I hadn't been expecting that. "Why? She was happy!"

She nodded. "She was, but some people find it harder to forget than others and we hurt her deeply. I never resented her for that. I understood."

"What did people say in town?" I asked, knowing that small towns could be judgmental, especially back then.

She chuckled as she sipped her coffee. "Oh, I was the home wrecker. No one thought about the fact that Susan was happily married with a family, they just focused on the fact that I was a slut," She giggled. "It showed me something, though."

"What was that?" I asked.

She smiled at me. "To never judge anyone before I know who they are."

I smiled. It didn't take a rocket scientist to know who she was talking about.

EPOV

"Edward!"

I cringed at the familiar voice and the clicking of heels that followed.

Dammit, I just wanted to get coffee and leave. I had been fast and efficient and basically thrown the money at Mrs. Cheney in an effort to escape before I was detected.

"Tanya!" I greeted with a fake smile as I turned to greet her.

She smiled at me, fluttering her eye lashes and pouting her lips. "I was trying to get your attention inside."

"I'm sorry. I didn't hear you," I lied. Why in the name of all that is holy did she have to be working today?

"Well, that's okay then," She waved it off. "Now that I have your attention, I was wondering when you were going to take me out on that date." She said seductively.

I held back a sigh.

For over two weeks now Tanya had made it obvious that she wanted me. It wasn't arrogance talking, it was the truth. She had made it more than clear that she wanted me to take her to bed. I was trying to make it clear that it wasn't going to happen without hurting her feelings.

Tanya wasn't a bad person, I didn't want to embarrass or offend her. I just didn't want her that way. I did when I was younger, but any teenage boy could tell you that you pretty much wanted any girl who was attractive and willing back then and I was no different. I hadn't known Tanya very well or even intended to know her; I had just been drunk and wanted to get in her pants. I am not proud of that, but I can't go back and change the past.

The morning after when I had woken up, hung over and in pain and rolled over to see Tanya Denali lying beside me, I knew I needed to change my ways. Especially after I had to tell her that this was a onetime thing, a mistake, and had to see the hurt in her eyes. Tanya had a bigger reputation that I did, and was proud to say it was true, but she hadn't deserved my dismissal of her.

The thing was, whilst I had gotten over casual sex that night, she hadn't and was basically throwing herself at me whenever we bumped into each other. I wasn't ashamed to admit that I was an utter coward and had been avoiding her.

"Tanya..." I began.

"I know, I know, you don't see me like that." She placed her hand on my chest and trailed her fingers down my stomach. "I could make you see me like that," She promised in a seductive whisper.

I frantically searched for a way to get out of this and like a gift from above, I saw her, just as Tanya was about to trail her fingers further south.

I jumped back and caught her hand. "No, I was going to say that I have a date with someone else." I lied, but even as I said it, an idea occurred to me and it was genius.

"With who?" She demanded angrily.

"Isabella Swan," I answered.

"That freak?" She demanded.

I felt the anger course through my body at her cruel words. "Don't ever call her that, Tanya."

Hey eyes widened at my cold tone.

I ignored her and turned to Bella and waved like a mad man. "Bella!" I called, hiding a smile when I saw her head shoot up.

I found it cute how nervous it made her to be talked to outside of her own home. We spoke for hours about anything and everything and it was like we had known each other for years, which was kind of true, but as soon as we stepped outside, she froze up. I knew it would take time to get her to open up, which was why my idea seemed perfect. Two birds with one stone.

She pulled her ear phones out and waved back awkwardly with a tiny frown on her face. Adorable.

When I waved her over, she reluctantly crossed the street.

"Hi," I greeted, placing my arm around her shoulder.

I felt her frown and look at me like I was out of my mind.

"Hi." She answered back, confused.

"This is Tanya Denali." I introduced her pointedly, Bella knew all about Tanya.

Despite her discomfort, I could see the amusement light her eyes and her cheeks twitch as she said a low greeting to Tanya, who returned the favor with extra enthusiasm.

"So, I'm sorry, Tanya, but..."

"I understand. I'll see you around. Bye," She rushed out before rushing back into the diner, most likely to tell everyone about the latest scoop.

"What was that about?" Bella demanded as soon as we were alone.

I cringed. "I didn't want to be rude."

She narrowed her eyes. "So you drag me into it? Thanks," She drawled sarcastically. Another thing I found adorable.

"I just needed to get her off my back." I defended myself.

She rolled her eyes. "Then just tell her, you little coward. She's a big girl, she can handle it."

"I know, but I just feel bad. Shouldn't there be a limit on the amount of times you reject one person?"

She looked at me with wide eyes. "Are you actually saying that? You, who thought it would be okay to show up at my door in the middle of the night and refused to leave until I shared pizza and beer with you? Seriously?"

I glared at her. "You enjoyed that night just as much as I did. Besides, let's not argue since I need a favor."

She shook her head. "I should never have let you in my house."

I smirked at her. "But you did so now you have deal with the consequences."

I heard her mutter something along the lines of 'arrogant asshole' underneath her breath.

"What favor?" She growled.

"I need you to go on a date with me tonight." I told her, holding my breath as I waited for her reaction.

"Are you high?" She demanded.

"You say the sweetest things to me." I replied. "No, I am not high, it's just that I told Tanya I was going on a date with you as a reason as to why I wouldn't go on a date with her."

"Why?" She demanded in bewilderment.

I shrugged. "It seemed like a good idea at the time." I replied, which was the truth. It was a good idea, since it worked. It was also a good idea to show Bella that going out on a date with me wouldn't be terrible. That way, when we actually started dating, it wouldn't be a big deal. It was kind of like easing her into it. One step at a time. Like I said, two birds with one stone.

"Edward..." She began.

"I know. I know you don't want to date me or even be seen in public with me. Which I am trying not to develop a complex about, by the way. It's just that it's worked and if we don't go then it will get back to Tanya and it will all start again."

"Well someone thinks highly of himself," She commented.

I scowled. "I'm just telling you the truth. By now the entire town will know and they will also know if we don't go on a date, which means Tanya will know."

"How long do I have to date you for?" She demanded.

Forever, I almost said, but bit my tongue. "You only have to be seen with me a couple of times, and then we can break up and remain friends. By that time Tanya will find someone else to fixate on." I promised, which was true. Well, the part about Tanya was true, not about the part where we break up.

"I don't know." She sighed, obviously uncomfortable with the idea.

I hated myself for lying to her and for trying to get her to do something that she obviously didn't want to know, but I honestly believed that this would be good for her. She needed to get out of that house before she really did turn into the cat lady she was talking about. Also, I knew that if she gave it a chance, she could see how good we could really be together.

"Please, Bella, you'll be doing me a favor." I pleaded.

She battled with herself for the longest time that I actually thought that she'd day no.

"Fine. Okay, I'll go, but only for an hour. We get a drink, we show our faces and then we leave, deal?"

"Deal," I agreed quickly.

"If I want to leave at any time, I will." She told me and I knew she being honest, she would just get up and leave.

"Of course." I agreed. I wanted her to get out and enjoy life. I wanted her to see us together and what we could be. I didn't want to make her miserable. If she was uncomfortable or even looked like she wanted to leave, then we were out of there. "Meet you at the bar at seven?" I suggested casually.

I wanted to pick her up at her door and take her somewhere on a real date, but she'd hate that and she would feel more in control if she had her own car.

She groaned. "Great, now I have to find something to wear," She muttered as she walked away, leaving me standing there without a second glance.

I had to smile as I watched her mutter to herself as she walked down the street.

I ignored the voice that told me I was taking too much for granted, that this would backfire.

Tonight Bella would realize what was standing right in front her. What we could have with each other. She just had to be shown. If I did everything at Bella's pace then we wouldn't even have spoken yet, never mind become friends.

This was the right thing to do, I assured myself.

**A/N**** So, there it is? What do you think of Edwards's tactics of trying to ease Bella into dating him? What will Bella think? Cause let's face it, she's going to find out!**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N**** Hi guys! Sorry for the late update, I can only blame it on a lack of talent on my end. Some big things happen in this chapter and whenever I would sit down to write... nothing! It's driven me insane! So, I decided that I wasn't allowed to sleep unless I completed the chapter. While I knew what was going to happen it was hard to write. Then when I switched to EPOV it seemed to flow a lot easier. Please let me know what you think in a review or a PM if you hate it because I will cry if it's on my review wall. Song for Bella and Edwards date is Give In To Me by Garrett Hedlund and Leighton Meester, not the original. That is what I listened to whilst writing and I think it says what Edward is thinking and feeling.**

**BPOV**

A date! What the hell was I thinking agreeing to go on a date with him? Wasn't I just telling Mrs. Tucker how I didn't feel I was ready for that?

Damn Edward Cullen and his big green eyes and sexy smile. Damn him straight to the pits of hell.

To say that I was panicking was an understatement. The thing was, over the last two weeks, I had kind of developed feelings for him. Feelings that you shouldn't have for a new friend who you were just getting to know. It scared the hell out of me.

So, here I was in a small women's boutique for the first time since I came to town. Hell, for the first time in years. I happened to think internet shopping was one of the best inventions. No muss, no fuss and no sales people.

The boutique was small, but beautiful. Soft music played in the background of the well-lit store, the walls were the color of a soft rose and the smells were sweet and feminine. I would have lived in a store like this when I was younger.

"Can I help you?" I heard a cheery voice ask from behind me.

I stifled a groan. This is why I didn't come into stores like this; no one knew to leave you alone.

I turned around and bit back another groan. Jessica Stanley. The young woman was tiny with big brown curls and cool blue eyes. She also had taken a complete dislike to me.

As soon as she saw me, her bright and cheerful smile disappeared and her eyes hardened.

It was my fault, on my first day in town I had ran into Jessica when she was out running. She had jogged over to me and started asking all these questions and talking about the town and it was just too much. I had ended up bursting out 'Stop!', and then Id turned and walked away. By the next day the whole town thought I was rude and weird.

I hadn't minded, not that many people will talk to you if they think your bitch, but why did it have to be her.

"Hi, I, um... I was just after something to wear," I mumbled, feeling that tightness in my chest that overwhelmed me so much sometimes that it felt like I couldn't breathe.

"Obviously," She drawled like I was an idiot.

I took a deep breath and tried to remain calm. She reminded me of girls I had used to hate in high school, those bitchy girls who had an attitude that was bigger than their stuffed bras were.

I couldn't blame her for not liking me after how I had treated her, but couldn't she just give me a break? I was having a stressful day as it was.

I tried for a smile, but even I knew it looked as strained as it felt.

"I'm sure we can find some that would...Suit you," She finished dryly as she took in my figure.

I felt my chest getting tighter and the need to leave was stronger than ever. It was only the fact that I truly had nothing suitable to wear tonight that kept my feet in place. Even if my legs did feel like jelly.

My reaction was stupid, but I couldn't help it. I hated myself for it.

"Jessica," a clear voice snapped.

We both looked over to see a small pixie like woman that stood behind the cash register with a cool look in her large blue eyes.

She was tiny and petite, with short black hair and pixie features. She was also stunningly beautiful, even as she glared at her co-worker.

"Alice?" She queried.

"Why don't you go out back and sort out that shipment whilst I take care of Miss Swan." She made it sound like a suggestion, but I think both me and Jessica knew it was an order.

She nodded her head slightly and left with one last parting look at me.

I sighed as she strutted away and felt my shoulders drop. How I wished I was who I used to be. That girl would have had no problem in telling a woman like Jessica where to shove it.

The woman named Alice strolled over to me, her movements light and graceful.

"Hello, I'm Alice," She greeted me with her hand outstretched, a bright smile on her face.

It wasn't the smile I saw though, as dazzling as it was, it was the sadness.

After years of watching people instead of actually communicating with them, I had developed a good perception of certain things. Like Edward, there was sadness in her eyes. A sadness that was heartbreaking because it was so opposite to the person she tried to make the rest of the world believe she was.

It actually me feel a little more at ease, to know she wasn't this happy, excitable person. That she had her own problems and secrets.

"I have a date. Kind of," I told her before I could stop myself.

She frowned slightly. "Kind of?"

I sighed. "Yes. You see, I'm kind of going on an extremely casual date tonight and..." I trailed off, unsure how to finish.

"You want to look casual, but so hot that he can't take his eyes off you. Something that looks like you've just thrown it on before walking out the door to meet him." She grinned.

"Yes," I replied and found that my smile was more natural with her than it had been with Jessica.

She laughed. "I have just the thing for you." She said as she grabbed my hand and pulled me over to the racks of stunning clothes and began to search for what she had in mind.

"So, tell me about the guy," She encouraged without looking at me, which made it easier for me to talk.

I tilted my head to the side as I struggled to find the right line between being honest with the nice woman in front of me and lying to her.

I decided to stick to the truth as much as possible. "My friend, he's really sweet and nice and sexy as hell and he kind of asked me out on a date, but I think he sees it as of a more casual thing than I do."

She nodded her head as if she understood completely. "Hence wanting to look effortlessly amazing. You want to look sexy, but you don't want him to know that you want to look sexy."

"A guy could never understand the inner workings of a woman's mind." I laughed.

Alice laughed, the sound reminding me of wind chimes.

"Here we are!" She exclaimed as she held up multiple metal hangers. "You will look amazing in this. He won't know what hit him."

* * *

Later that night I pulled up outside the local bar and saw Edward leaning up against the wall, waiting for me.

My breath caught as I took him in. His hair its usual disarray and wearing a black button down shirt and snug worn out jeans he looked mouthwatering.

I sighed. "You can do this. Be calm, cool... do not hyperventilate," I ordered myself. The last thing I needed whilst being calm and cool and acting like I hadn't just spent the last three hours preparing for our casual 'date' was to ruin everything by needing to breathe into a paper bag.

I climbed out of the car with shaky legs and tried my best for causal as I walked over to meet Edward on the side walk.

I hated the fact that he was draped against the wall as if he didn't have a care in the world whilst I was using every bit of my concentration on walking with tripping over and making a complete ass of myself before the night had even begun.

Luckily, I knew Edward enough by now to know that he expected me to be a little awkward tonight. He knew I wasn't used to spending time in town or with the people who lived in it. So at least I had that in my favor.

Wearing a translucent forest green tiered camisole, a cropped leather jacket and skin tight jeans, I felt good. I just prayed that I'd be able to stay vertical thanks to the black leather studded ankle boots that Alice had insisted that I wear. I had almost lost my balance twice and that was just walking to the car.

I had been a nervous wreck and though she made me wear the death boots, I was now eternally in love with Alice Brandon. She had made me feel so comfortable during our time together and helped prepare me for my 'casual' date, giving me tips on how to act and how to keep my composure. She had insisted on helping me get ready, claiming she had nothing better to do and had travelled to my house and helped curl my hair, apply makeup and hand me a paper bag when needed. Even the cat's liked her.

I had thought I would hate having someone else in my home, but Alice had a way of fitting in wherever she went. She had walked into my home and it felt like she had been coming over to help me get ready for dates for years. I was happy that I was making progress with people and knew I had Edward to thank for that.

"Hi," I smiled weakly as I met Edward on the side walk.

He didn't say a word as he looked at me, his eyes scanning my entire body as he straightened.

I stood there, my heart pounding, my palms beginning to sweat as I worried that I was dressed all wrong and I looked like an idiot. The last time I'd gone on a date it had been for ice cream and a movie with a guy named Jacob. It was fun and sweet and over within two hours. I hadn't even bothered day dreaming about finding a guy who I would like enough to go one a date with. I had never thought I would trust a guy enough to be alone with him. Not until Edward.

"You look..." he trailed off with a sigh and I thought I would vomit. "Perfect," He finished with a smile as he held out his hand.

At his words and his sexy grin my heart found its natural rhythm once again. I didn't look like an idiot, just like Alice had promised.

I took his hand lightly in mine and smiled at the gentle squeeze.

"You ready?" He asked.

I looked into his green eyes and felt myself relax.

"Yes."

**EPOV**

She looked out of this world, I thought as we navigated our way through the bar to an empty table that was far enough away from the crowd so that Bella would be comfortable, but close enough so that we could make a quick exit should the need arise.

I had been a nervous wreck most of the day as I waited for the time to pass until I could see her. I must have glanced at my phone at least a thousand times, expecting to find a message saying that she wasn't coming tonight.

There hadn't been a message.

When she had gotten out of her car, wearing that sexy blouse and jeans that fit her like a glove... It had taken everything in me to stay on the side walk and not go over and greet her the way my body demanded I do.

I could tell she was nervous, so was I, but this would be good for her. I would never bring her here if I thought anyone would treat her badly and I wanted to prove to her that we could have something special if she just gave me the chance.

Well, tonight was my chance to do just that and I wasn't going to mess it up.

"This place is nice," She commented as we took our seats in the booth.

I hid my smile at her tone. While I knew she was trying for casual, her voice had been a little higher than normal and her eyes were constantly darting around the room.

I covered her smaller hand with mine from across the table.

"It is," I agreed. "I chose this place because the beers cheap and the music is good. And the people are nice," I added softly.

She looked down at our hands before looking up at me with a bashful smile.

"I'm sorry; it's just that I'm a little nervous. People don't like me much," She shrugged.

I frowned, angry at her words. "Why? Has someone said anything to you?" I demanded.

She shook her head quickly. "No, don't get angry. It's my fault."

I scowled at her across the table. "How is it your fault?" I growled, wanting to find whoever had made her think that and strangle them.

Her smile was wry. "Well, in a town like this they kind of expect you to be pleasant and chatty or at the very least polite." She shrugged her shoulders. "I'm not."

I couldn't help but smile. "Yes, you are. You just need a little nudge," I chuckled. I couldn't help but think of the first night when I had shown up on her porch and scared the life out of her. She hadn't been polite, but she had let me in that night. In more ways than one.

She chuckled. "Yeah, a nudge. I think I have pretty much offended every person in town who has tried to even so much as speak to me."

I heard the honesty in her words, and the shame.

"Hey, you had your reasons," I told her gently, my heart breaking for her as she shrugged her shoulders.

The movement was so vulnerable that I felt everything in me reaching out to protect her from anything that could hurt her.

Over the past two weeks I had gotten to know a more confident version Bella. Yes, she still had those moments where she looked like she was about to run away from everything and everyone, but it was rare. So it shocked me to realize that she could still be so vulnerable.

In an effort to distract her and bring a smile back to her face, I moved on to other topics, mainly of Emmett, Jasper and I and our high school adventures together, even telling her about the time when Emmett decked a guy for me.

"Why did he do that?" She asked with wide eyes.

I cringed at the question. I didn't want to answer the question, but she had been enjoying herself, laughing and joking about my childhood. Yes, she froze up when the waitress came but after the third drink refill she had even smiled at her. I got the feeling that with Bella it was all about consistency. The more she knew you, the more she began to lower the walls she had carefully constructed to protect herself.

I also didn't want her to focus on the people from other tables who would occasionally glance this way and whisper. It infuriated me that they thought she was some source of gossip and I understood why she had always avoided town.

"Well, when I was younger I was kind of tall and gangly and..." I trailed off uncomfortably.

"You were a dork." She finished, biting her lower lip. Though she was obviously trying to hide the laughter that threatened to burst free at my expense, I couldn't help but find the movement sexy as hell. I had spent a lot of time thinking about those full lips. I thought about how soft they would feel against mine, how they would feel brushing against my skin, how they would taste...

I glared at her, trying to conceal the desire I could feel raging through my body. "No. I was just a little different."

"You were a dork," She repeated cheerfully.

"I find that word hurtful and offensive." I told her.

She just grinned. "Heard it a lot, have you?"

It took everything in me not to join in with her laughter. I loved this side of her, the playful, teasing side of her that I knew not many people got to see. It made me feel honored and humble to know that she shared it with me. Even when it was aimed at me.

"_Anyway_," I said pointedly, "this guy was giving me grief, always making fun of me. Always giving me shit and making my life a living hell. One day, he made the mistake of punching me when Emmett was around," I grinned at the memory. I still hated Sam Uley. "I was doubled over, trying to get my breath back when all I hear is cursing and grunting and the next thing I knew the guy who was bullying me was being dragged in front of me and ordered to apologize. After he did, Emmett threw him into the lockers and said that if he ever so much as looked in my direction again then he would rip him to pieces and laugh while he was doing it."

"Did he try anything afterwards?" She asked eagerly.

"He tried. It was a few weeks after; Emmett was out hunting with his family. He swore he was going to hunt grizzly, but I've always had my doubts," I told her, making her laugh. "So, Sam, knowing that I was alone because Jasper had driven his girlfriend home early, came up to me and started giving me hell, even clocked me one. I hadn't seen it coming and ending up flying into a wall where I got this," I told her, pointing to the scar that ran through my left eyebrow.

"Bastard," She hissed as she winced in sympathy.

"I know," I drawled. "It hurt like a bitch, but I got up and I kicked the shit out of him."

She surprised me and half of the bar, by bursting into hysterical laughter. It was a sight to see, Bella laughing so freely. When she laughed, the shadows in her eyes vanished and her whole face lit up. She was beautiful.

"Good for you," She giggled.

"Thanks. You see, when Emmett and Jasper had finished ripping me a new one for not telling them about it they taught me a few things to protect myself. My mom and dad have never really been one for fighting and wouldn't raise me that way, but Jasper and Emmett had no qualms about it. In fact, their 'training' hurt a lot more than anything Sam ever dished out."

"They sound like good friends." She smiled.

"They are. They are the best friends. They would be to you if you ever met them." I promised her, trying to get her to open up to more than Mrs. Tucker and me.

She looked into my eyes for the longest time and I wondered what she found there. Whatever it was, it must have been good because she answered, "Maybe."

A slow country song came on, one that brought a small smile come to her lips and made her eyes soften.

"I love this song," She murmured.

Sensing an opportunity, I got to my feet and held a hand out to her.

Her reaction was so shocked that I almost ruined the moment and laughed.

"We're on a date, remember?" I winked at her as I took her soft hand and pulled her to her feet.

"Edward," She began uncomfortably as I directed her over to the dance floor and pulled her into my arms.

"Ssh. Just dance." I whispered as I took her hand in my and wrapped my arm around her waist.

After a few seconds of deliberation, she gave in, resting her head on my shoulder.

I felt triumph wash over me. Her body was relaxed and soft against mine. It was perfect.

I slowly twirled us around as I listened to a song that seemed so perfect for us and for this night. _**Give In To Me.**_

I couldn't help but smile as I listened to the lyrics and how in sync they were with what I felt for her.

I was so happy, that when she looked up into my eyes, her eyes soft and dreamy, I made the biggest mistake of my life.

"Can I tell you a secret?" I whispered.

"Yes," She asnwered, just as quietly as if she too didn't want to ruin this perfect moment.

"I planned all this." I admitted.

She frowned slightly before smiling and shaking her head. "I don't understand," She admitted.

I laughed. "Well, when Tanya ambushed me earlier, I saw you and this idea came to me. I used Tanya as an excuse just to get you to go on a date with me."

She stopped dancing and pulled herself slowly out of my arms, the dreamy look fading from her eyes and confusion taking its place.

"Wait, what do you mean you used Tanya as an excuse?"

It was then that I realised that my idea to tell her the truth and of her laughing and throwing her arms around me was the stupidest thing that I could have ever thought would happen. Of course she wouldn't thank me, you dumb shit, I yelled to myself.

Not seeing a way out of it, I began to explain as the song ended in the background. I tried not to see it as an omen.

"Well, I just thought that if I could get you out and show you how good we could be that maybe-"

"That maybe I'd just forget about the past eight years and every nightmare and insecurity that I have ever had and throw my arms around you because you bought me a drink," She finished bitingly.

I cursed to myself. This wasn't cute angry Bella, this was furious Bella and it wasn't cute or sweet. It was deadly serious.

"No, not like that," I rushed out. "I just know that we have something. I knew that you wouldn't come around any other way. So when all that happened with Tanya I thought that I could just show you and you would see."

"Come around," She echoed before looking up at me with pain filled eyes. "I thought you understood. I thought you got why I didn't come into town and why I didn't talk to people. You made me think it was all okay. That wasn't a freak. I thought you understood," She repeated as tears filled her eyes. "You lied to me and you manipulated me."

"No," I argued. "It wasn't like that." I protested, everything in me recoiling at the sight of her tears and her heart wrenching words.

"Then what was it like?" She burst out. "You just admitted that you used what happened with Tanya as a way of getting me here so you could trick into dating you when you knew I wasn't ready."

"But you are ready! Tonight proves that." I insisted. "I just knew that you thought you weren't ready and that maybe if I could just ease you into it."

"Ease me into it?" She demanded. "Into dating you? Don't you think that I should be very much aware of when I'm dating a man? I may be socially inept, Edward, but I'm not retarded." She snapped. "I thought you were my friend."

"I am your friend, Bella. I just thought-"

"You just thought that you'd manipulate me into dating you. What is wrong with you? I came here because it was _you_ and you would never do anything to make me uncomfortable, right? Well, guess what? I am. I have been. I was freaking out all day and I did it for _you_. I did it because you asked me and because you had been such a good friend to me over the past couple of weeks. Boy, did I wish I hadn't bothered."

When she went to turn away, I quickly grabbed her arm. "Get. Your. Hand. Off. Of. Me." She bit out.

"No. Bella, we have to talk about this. I never meant to hurt you."

I didn't get out the rest of my apology. The one that I realised I owed her because she was right. I had lied and manipulated her. I had done it with good intentions, but that still didn't make it right.

I was about to tell her all of this when her tiny fist came smacking into my eye, sending unbelievable pain rocketing through my face.

"Shit," I muttered as I dropped my grip on her arm. I hadn't been clocked like this in years. Sam Uley had nothing on Bella.

"You absolute bastard," She hissed.

I looked up to see her eyes filled with tears that could break the coldest of hearts. To see pain that would bring a giant to his knees. Pain that I had put there with my arrogance and my carelessness.

"I wish I had never let you in." She told me before walking away and leaving the bar.

Leaving me.

**A/N**** So there you have it. Bella found out and decked him! What can I say? I have violent tendencies. Bella is feeling hurt and betrayed and Edward is just realising what he has done. Will he be able to fix it? How will he fix it? Let me know in a review! Next theme song may be Dance So Good by Wakey! Wakey! Mainly because I love that song and I think that will make a lot of sense to the next chapter. Listen to the song and let me know what you think!**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N**** Hi guys! Can I just tell you how awesome you all are? To wake up to 29 messages that tell me that you have all favourited or are following or have reviewed this story... it's not possible to tell you how much that means to me. It makes the aching fingers and sensitive fingertips worth it. It makes the horrible writers block and hair pulling when I can't think of a word I want to us, worth it! I love you all and I thank you from the bottom of my heart for all the love and support you show me.**

**BPOV**

I stormed up onto the porch and yanked the door open, slamming it shut with enough force to rattle the entire house.

"Men!" I screamed as soon as I got inside. The cats, who had been asleep on the sofa, as usual, looked up at me with wary eyes. "Can you believe him? He'd just ease me into dating, he says," I rambled as I made my way around the house, making sure the shutters were still locked from the inside, the cat's trailing along after me.

"Can he be any more of an asshole? What did he think was going to happen? That Id laugh and throw my arms around him, thanking him for taking the decision out of my hands because I'm just the little woman? Over my cold, dead, decomposing body will that ever happen!"

Suffice to say, I was furious. He had lied and manipulated and then claimed that he was doing it with my best interests at heart. Wasn't that my call? He had said he wanted to show me that we could have something. What he had shown me was that he lied to get what he wanted.

I had been stressing over this date and how I felt that this was a bigger deal to me, when all along he had planned it so our 'casual date' was an actual date. Asshole.

Why would he do that? Why would he lie to me when I thought he was a good person? Persistent, maybe, but not manipulative.

What I was most angry at was that it had worked. I had seen that I could stand there with him and dance and forget all about the people around me and focus on the man in my arms who made my heart skip a beat and turned my legs to jelly. I had loved being in his arms, the feel of his strong body against mine. I had wanted to taste those full lips and get lost in him. Then he had told me it was all lies and it had felt like someone had poured ice water over me.

He had lied and that was something I don't think I could forgive.

I turned the cats and sighed. "Well, I am truly pissed off. There's only one thing for it. Where's Taylor?"

* * *

"Well, I always did say that men were as dumb as dirt," Mrs. Tucker muttered as we went through inventory. It was a long and boring process, but chatting with Mrs. Tucker always made up for it.

"Tell me about it," I replied as we made our way down the aisles.

I had spent all of last night ignoring Edwards's calls and dancing around my living room to Taylor Swift albums until I had crashed onto the couch, falling to sleep. I had only made it to work on time because my nightmare had returned with a vengeance and had me waking up in a cold sweat, calling out my brother's name. Last night was a bad night in more ways than one.

"So, what did you do?" She asked as she frowned down at her clipboard.

"I punched him and got the hell out of there." I sighed, dreading her reaction.

I was right to have dreaded it. She burst into laughter, shaking so much that the clipboard dropped from her hands and clattered to the floor.

"Good for you!" She cheered.

"Thanks," I muttered as I looked down at my sore hand. They never tell you that when you punch someone, your hand hurts too!

"Hello?" I heard a familiar voice call out.

I frowned as I turned to where the voice had come from. "Alice?"

"Bella?" She called back.

"Marko!" Mrs. Tucker called out in amusement.

"Polo!" I heard Alice laugh as she came closer to finding us.

She popped out from behind a stack of books with a bright smile. "Hi Mrs. Tucker!" She greeted.

"Hello, Alice, how are you?" Mrs. Tucker smiled, which was strange. I rarely saw her smile at anyone.

"I'm good." She said with a nod.

"And young Jasper?" She asked archly and by the flat look in Alice's eyes, I knew that this 'Jasper' character was someone who Alice had been seeing.

I frowned as the names all connected to me. Jasper was one of Edward's best friends, then Alice must be one of his friends also. Great.

Mrs. Tucker grinned when Alice refused to answer. "I'll be in the office." She told us before leaving.

"Interfering old woman." She muttered.

"I heard that!" She called out. Alice just rolled her eyes before turning to me with a bright smile.

"So, how did it go?" She demanded eagerly.

"Terribly," I answered honestly. I liked Alice and wasn't going to lie anymore. Especially when I didn't have to in the first place.

She frowned at me. "I don't understand. What went wrong?"

I turned to her with a scowl. "Oh, it turns out that my sweet, kind friend was lying to me. I wasn't completely honest with you yesterday," I admitted. "I thought he only asked me out so he could shake off a girl who was a little too interested, but it turns out he used that as an excuse to get me to go on a date with him." I fumed.

"Why?" She asked in confusion.

"I don't know. Maybe because he just likes to lie and make an ass out of me. Maybe because he thought it was funny."

"Maybe because he knew you wouldn't go any other way," She added with a small smile.

I huffed. "That's what annoys me the most. If he knew I wouldn't go then why did he do all of this? He knew I wasn't ready."

"Sit down," She ordered gently as we seated ourselves at one of the may empty tables.

"Tell me everything and don't leave a single detail out."

I sighed and then began to tell her every detail from last night, including the part where he decided to tell me what he had done when I had been falling into his eyes and liking it there.

"Wait, so you're telling me that Edward, one of my oldest friends, Edward Cullen, was asked out by Tanya and used you as an excuse not to go, but twisted it so he could secretly go on an actual date with you?" She demanded with a frown, not quite being able to grasp it.

I nodded. "Yep."

"And then, when you were dancing in his arms, losing yourself in the moment, he chose that particular moment to tell you the truth?"

I nodded again. "Yep."

She sighed. "And then you hit him?" She demanded.

I flinched. "Okay, I regret that part. I shouldn't have hit him and not just because my hand kills, but because it's inexcusable and I don't even like violence," I admitted, brushing my hand against the ugly scar on my abdomen. "But he was standing there and everything came flooding to me. He was supposed to be my friend, Alice. I don't let people in as a rule, but he seemed so sweet and genuine and to find out that he turned out to be an asshole... It just hurt me and I lashed out."

She reached for my hand, holding it tightly in hers. "While I don't condone what you did, I understand it. I think it's easy for everyone to say that women should be above violence and shrug it off, but we're people with emotions and we also make mistakes, but I do think that when this is over you owe him a big apology." She told me quietly, her eyes soft. "That being said, I can't wrap my head around this. Edward is a good guy. He is sweet and funny and kind and he would never do anything to hurt anyone."

"Then why did he?" I asked quietly. "Why did he lie and make this up? Why didn't he just tell me the truth?"

She shrugged her delicate shoulders. "I think he was afraid you'd say no again. I know Edward, he wants to save the world," She smiled. "He would want to show you that you can have that future together and that kind of relationship. I think he was just trying to-"

"Ease me into it," I finished with a wry smile.

"Don't punch me," She teased. "I'm just saying that I do understand why he did what he did. I don't agree with it, you should make that decision yourself, but I can see why."

I thought about what she said for a moment and I found myself understanding. He hadn't done it to be mean or to trick me, he had just tried to show me what we could have without me freaking out and running away. Like Alice, I didn't agree, but at least now I understood.

"What do I do now? I'm not ready to forgive him." I told her.

She nodded her head slightly. "I understand. All because you know his reasons, it doesn't make it better. But can I give you a little advice from me to you? Don't let it drive a wedge between you. Sometimes not being able to forgive someone is what drives them away."

I wanted to ask her what had happened to drive a wedge between her and Jasper, who I had guessed she was talking about from what Mrs. Tucker and said, but I could see that she didn't want to talk about it and I respected her enough to give her that.

**EPOV**

"You absolute dumbass," A voice drawled from my office door.

I glanced up with a fierce growl at whoever had come in when I had told everyone to leave me the hell alone this morning.

I'd had the worst night. I had gone home to my highly amused parents who had handed me the phone and a frozen bag of peas and then spent the rest of the night trying to get Bella to answer her phone. I had debated just heading over, but I was positive it would only make it worse or she'd release the cats on me.

It had killed me when she refused to answer my calls. Before Bella had been indifferent to me. She didn't like me, but she didn't dislike me. Her walls were her natural instinct to protect herself and keep people at a distance. This time the wall was to keep me out and that hurt.

Now, I was in work with one bitch of a black eye, no sleep and we'd run out of coffee. Some days you just shouldn't get out of bed.

I smiled when I saw who was standing there.

"Alice!" I greeted as she went to get to my feet, but she held up a hand to stop me.

"Sit down," She ordered sharply.

"Typical," I muttered. "When did you get here?"

Two weeks ago when I had arrived home and asked about Alice, Jasper had informed me that she had gone on vacation a few days before and wasn't expected home yet. I had felt for the guy, since he and Alice had broken up Jasper had only kept his sanity because she was still in town and he could still see her, when she was gone the poor bastard was lost.

"I got home yesterday and ran into a certain Bella Swan." She told me cheerfully and she took a seat across from me, resting her high heeled feet on the desk as she relaxed back in the chair.

"Oh shit," I muttered, knowing why she was here and why she refused to hug me.

"Oh shit, indeed." She agreed with a sneer. "What were you thinking? Now, I may not know all the details of Bella's past, but I watched the news. I heard all about it and I know that since she moved to Sugar Grove she has given everyone a wide berth with the exception of old Mrs. Tucker, who I doubt the devil himself would have the balls to disagree with. So, why would you lie to her when you had finally earned her trust?"

I scowled at her. I'd had a really bad night and morning and I didn't need her coming in here and judging me.

"Alice," I growled.

"Tell me," She snapped. "Because I just came from seeing her and I don't think she's ready to forgive you."

"What like your still not ready to forgive Jazz for something he didn't do?" I snapped.

I felt like a prick when I saw hurt fill her eyes, but also it was true and someone should finally say that. Jasper had told us to leave it alone, to not get involved, but someone should tell her what she was doing.

I watched as her eyes hardened. "One has nothing to do with the other. Besides, right now I wouldn't be worrying about my past relationships. Id worry about how I'm going to get Bella to believe I am not a complete prick."

"You have such a way with words," I drawled.

"Well, I wasn't the one who told the girl I was falling for that I'd lied and manipulated her when she was finally realising that maybe I was right."

My heart stopped at her words. "Did she say that?" I demanded.

"Yes. She also said she couldn't understand why you would do such a thing when you have always seemed to understand her. Why did you, Edward? Because I may not be friends with Bella like you," She said sarcastically. "But I read the papers, I know the story and I'm thinking that Bella is a girl who doesn't trust easily, with good reason, so when she does give you that trust you shouldn't jeopardize that by lying to her. She deserves more than that."

I wanted to scream, but not at her, at myself. She was right.

I leaned forward and ran my fingers through my hair.

"Talk to me," She ordered gently.

"I just saw her putting me into a box. The friend box. I could see it happening day by day and I was worried, because she's not in that box to me. I want her, Alice. I want to be the one she trusts, the one she turns to. I want to be that man and when I saw myself being sectioned neatly away where I couldn't hurt her, I panicked and when everything happened with Tanya it seemed like a good idea. I was helping her, right? I was easing her into a relationship, right? What she doesn't know is that I was afraid that she would put me away and never see what was in front of her."

Alice stared at me for the longest time. "Wow," She breathed. "You should tell her that. The only way she will forgive you is for you to tell her the truth. About everything this time."

"What if she still doesn't want me?" I asked quietly.

Alice smiled softly. "Then you wait and you fight. You fight for her because when you stop fighting that's the moment you ever fail at anything. Trust me; I know what it's like to have someone stop fighting for you. It isn't good."

I opened my mouth to tell her that he hadn't. That he loved her as much today as he did then, more even. Before I could we heard a familiar voice and Alice froze.

"Hey, Edward," Jasper greeted and then froze in his tracks when he spotted Alice sitting there, his eyes taking in every inch of her. "Alice," He breathed before he could help it.

Alice spared a glance for him before getting to her feet. "Remember what I said."

"Remember what I said," I shot back at her with a pointed glance towards Jasper.

Alice nodded slightly before she rushed past Jasper, not looking back to see him staring after her with his heart in his eyes.

"She'll come around," I whispered, hoping I wasn't lying.

He turned back to me after he could no longer see her. "I know," he answered with a confidence that never failed to shock me. He was so sure of them.

He looked at me them. "Dude what happened to your eye?"

**BPOV**

Hot Yorkshire puddings covered in salt and mint sauce. It was the best comfort food.

I had been thinking of Alice's words all day and I couldn't help but agree. Though what Edward did was wrong, I was beginning to believe that in his extremely male mind he thought he was doing the right thing.

I wanted to talk to him, but I couldn't. I didn't know how to cross the bridge that had formed between us when I had punched him in the eye.

The cats stared at me in disgust as I demolished my third Yorkshire pudding. "I refuse to be judged." I mumbled.

I rolled my eyes when I heard the knock at my front door. I had lived here for months and I had answered that thing more in two weeks that I had in two months.

With a sigh I got to my feet and opened the door to find Edward pacing outside his car.

"Edward?"

He stopped dead in his tracks to turn to me. He looked so cute in his Sheriff uniform and his messy hair. I internally flinched when I spotted his black eye. Wow, it looked pretty bad.

"I don't want to be your friend, Bella."

I felt like I had been sucker punched. Here I was trying to think of a way to get back what we once had and he'd travelled to my house to tell me he didn't.

"Okay?" I said, my statement sounding my like a question.

He cursed under his breath before storming onto the porch to stand in front of me.

"No, I didn't mean in like that. What I mean is that I do want to be your friend. Your best friend. I just don't want to be put into that box."

I frowned, completely lost. "What box?"

He shook his head impatiently. "The one that any guy friend you have ever had gets shoved into and can never get out. I don't want that because your more to me."

"I am?" I asked weakly.

"Yes. You're beautiful and smart and funny as hell. You have all these rules and walls, but when you let someone in... You let them in all the way. I want to be the person you can't push out, Bella."

I laughed humorlessly. "So you lied? You say you want trust, Edward, but when you had it, you destroyed it. Why?" I demanded. I needed to understand why if he wanted me would he risk it. I understood what I thought was his reasons, but I wanted to hear it in his own words.

He looked at the ground and I saw the small smile that hovered on his lips before he looked up into my eyes.

"When I first met you, I was lost. I didn't know it at the time. Hell, I don't think I realised until Alice told me to be honest with you and the only way I can do that is to admit what I hadn't admitted to myself."

"Admit what?" I mumbled, wrapping my arms around my chest, trying to settle the butterflies that had taken flight.

"I love you, Bella. I think I have since the moment I saw you in that library when you shot me down so politely. I love you."

I felt my jaw drop.

"What?" I whimpered, as tears came to my eyes.

"I'm sorry; I didn't mean to make you cry. I just had to tell you. I think that's why I rushed things so I wouldn't be branded a friend. I panicked, Bella. I know what I did was wrong and I can't make up for it, but I'm begging you to give me a chance to prove that I am the man you thought I was."

I couldn't breathe.

"You love me?" I whispered.

"Yes," he smiled. "I didn't know or I didn't want to know because I have only known you for two weeks and I have been burnt before by someone who I thought I loved."

I shrugged my shoulders. "Then why are you telling me all this?"

"Because you deserve the truth. I should have realised that before and I am so sorry that I didn't. I won't promise never to screw up again, because it's a promise that I can't keep. I will promise that I love you, that I have loved you since I saw you and that I am yours."

"Edward," I began, but was interrupted by him as he pulled me into his arms and crushed my mouth to his in a long, deep, slow kiss.

**A/N**** I know, I'm a bitch and I love it! Yes, Edward has declared himself and I want to know what y'all (yes I used that word) thought of the chapter! Please review, they give me warm fuzzies!**


	7. Chapter 7

**A/N**** Hi guys! Thank you to all of you who have added this story or reviewed. I happen to think you are all swell! I also have realised that a lot of you share my violent thoughts... I love it! Here is what happened next with Bella and Edward and I hope you all like it!**

**BPOV**

"You kissed me."

The idiot in front of me just grinned like the Cheshire cat and nodded his head. "Yeah and I plan to do it again soon. And regularly."

"You kissed me," I repeated. I couldn't think of anything else to say.

The man had basically stalked me until I would be his friend, then I was his friend and he lied and manipulated me into going on a date with him, after I punched him for that, he shows up and declares his love and then _**freakin kisses me**_. What was I supposed to say?

"Bella, I think it's time we had the talk," he said decisively as he pulled me over to sit next to him on the porch swing.

I wanted to punch him again. Where was the nervous wreck that had been pacing outside his car before declaring himself? Now he just looked happy and cocky and I wanted to punch him again because I was all the over the place.

"The talk?" I forced out, my mind still on the fact that he had kissed me and more worryingly, I had liked it. A lot.

"Yes. You do know what the talking it, don't you?" He asked with a slight frown.

I scowled. "Yes. I also understand that it's a conversation have when they've been dating for a while, not when your friend shoves his tongue down your throat," I burst out. When I saw him bite his lip to control his laughter, I glared. "I also understand it's something that's brought up by a needy woman."

He ignored theat.

"I have laid my cards on the table, Bella. I like you, a lot. I love you. I don't expect you to turn around and say the same thing, but I need you to know that I do. I want a relationship with you. I have since the second I saw you."

I took a deep breath. "How could you know that? You didn't know me." I objected, not wanting to lose myself in his eyes, and how soft and loving they were.

He shrugged his shoulder. "I just did. I don't want to scare you, but Alice said that you deserved the truth and I agree. I have spent the past two weeks getting to know you and I have fallen more in love with you by the day. I love you, Bella and I want you. I want to be the man you let in your heart like you have never let another. I want that."

He sounded so calm and confident, more like he was telling me what was going to happen instead of what he wanted to happen. It wasn't until I looked deeply that I saw that flicker of uncertainty. Not at what he was saying, but at how I would react.

I got up and began to pace as I thought about what he'd told me, what Id felt when his lips and touched mine.

I couldn't deny that I wanted Edward that was thrown out when I kissed him back. I did want him. He was funny and sweet and persistent as hell. He made mistakes, which made him human and not annoyingly perfect. He was tall and handsome and strong. His strength though wasn't just physical, it was who he was. The man sitting on my porch swing watching me pace back and forth like a caged animal was strong and sure and everything a real man should be.

I couldn't deny that he was my friend and that I did trust him. He wouldn't be here now if I didn't, but what would our future be? He had helped me so much, but I wouldn't just turn into someone else because I finally admitted I liked him. I wouldn't be the girl who went into town every day and stopped to talk to people when we were grocery shopping. I only liked three people in the entire town.

Would he get tired of it eventually? I wouldn't blame him; I just didn't think I had it in me to lose like that.

I continued to pace as the thoughts whirled around in my head at a stunning speed that made me dizzy until I saw Edward sitting there. He wasn't trying to decipher what I was thinking or what I was going to decide, he was just waiting patiently. He wasn't rushing me to decide or demanding words of love in return, he was just waiting and I got the feeling that he would wait.

I took a deep breath and sat down next to him.

Edward was many things, I decided. He was a friend, he was a Sheriff and he one hell of a kisser. He made he laugh and he made me angry. He made me want something that I thought I'd never trust a man enough to do.

What was more important than any of that was that he made me feel safe. I hadn't felt safe for a very long time, but when he was here, I did.

Hadn't I told Alice that I thought more of our 'date' than he did? I made myself admit a few things that I had been from. One of them being that Edward had constantly been in my thoughts since I met him. I would be at work and think of something he'd said the night before and smile. I would think of how he would look at my plain pizza with disgust and laugh. In a way, I thought that when Edward got to know me, he would put me in the friend box and I had decided to make the most of it. To make comfortable there. We would be friends, great friends.

Only now, he was sitting there saying that he wanted me, saying that he loved me. Telling me that he wanted a relationship with me and finally I admitted to myself that I wanted that too.

"Edward," I whispered as I looked up into his beautiful green eyes that had haunted my dreams. "I haven't been in a relationship in years, "I felt compelled to warn him. "The last guy I dated dumped me a week after I had been dumped in the psych ward and I wasn't all that into him," I laughed without a trace of humor.

He cursed and reached for my hands, holding them tightly in his. They big and warm and safe.

I was quiet for the longest moment as I tried to gather my courage. "But I want try. I think you're right and that we could have something. I just don't want you to regret it because I am not normal. I will never be the girl who gets excited because there's going to be some shindig in town. I don't like people all that much and I just think I should warn you."

His smile could have lit up the sky. "I don't care that you're normal. You're perfect," He whispered.

"I'm not," I insisted, but he ignored me.

"Do you have work tomorrow?" He asked as he pulled me to my feet and we entered the house.

"No, why?" I asked.

He grinned, excitement lighting his eyes.

"Well, I'm free for the night and I was just wondering since we don't have to get up early, that maybe we could go somewhere and talk," He suggested.

With any other guy, I would have thought he meant something different, but somehow, with him, I knew he was just asking if we could go talk somewhere.

I smiled. "I'd like that."

* * *

We sat outside for hours on the porch swing, wrapped up in blankets and each other's arms and listened to the rain as it poured around us.

We talked about everything, what we were like as kids, Christmas stories, books, movies, music. My dilemma of Alan Jackson, Brad Paisley and Blake Shelton as my favorite country singer.

I loved the stories of him growing up and his friendship with Jasper and Emmett. How they had been like the brothers he'd never had and since he was the scrawniest of the three he was the one who always got pounded on by the two of them and how would day he was get his revenge.

At the mention of Jasper, I had to ask what had happened. I was dying to know, but Alice seemed so sad when his name was mentioned that I didn't want to push her.

"What happened between them? Alice and Jasper."

Edward sighed as he tightened his arms around me.

"They were made for each other. When the rest of us were going through the dating drama in high school they just seemed to be so strong and solid and everyone thought that they would make it. They loved each other that much."

"What happened to change that?" I asked quietly.

"A little while before their wedding a woman came up to Alice and told her that she had Jasper had slept together. Alice chose to believe her." He shrugged. "Now she and Jasper are alone and miserable. I just wish Alice would believe in him."

"I think Alice believes that Jaspers given up on her." I told him, remembering the advice she had given me.

He sighed. "Yeah, I realised that today. I was going to tell her the truth, but Jazz walked in and she left as quickly as she could."

I nodded. "The thing is though, no matter what say or do, it's Alice who has to believe. All you can do is being a good friend to both of them until that day comes."

He smiled down and me and kissed my head. "For a girl who avoids people, you sure give some good advice about them."

I shrugged. "Not really. I just happen to be stubborn and know that people can talk to me until they are blue in the face, but until I believe it, nothing changes. I used to drive my mom insane," I laughed.

"Do you want to talk about them?" He asked soft gently, that it brought tears to my eyes.

"No," I murmured. "One day, I promise. Just not yet."

He smiled and brushed his lips gently over mine. "One day."

The conversation turned to weddings after that and how much he hated them. I told him the story of one and only time I was a bridesmaid to my older cousin Sissy's wedding.

"I never liked Sissy," I told him as I played with his fingers, liking the fact that if I concentrated hard enough I could hear his strong and steady heartbeat.

"Why not?" He asked and I could hear the smile in his voice.

"She was self-centered and bitchy and she couldn't stand me," I added dryly. "I knew she didn't want me as her bridesmaid, but my mom talked her into it," I rolled my eyes remembering the hissy fit I had thrown when my mom had informed me about it all. "I had to wear this ugly peach wedding dress and one of those flower head bands. I was fifteen and I looked like the biggest idiot on the planet. It's not funny!" I snapped when I felt him laughing.

"I'm sorry, baby, tell me the rest," he encouraged.

I felt my heart flutter at his endearment. I had never been much for being called 'baby' or any other pet names, but when he was the one who said it... Well, it didn't sound bad at all.

"Anyway, two days before the wedding I watched this movie called _See Jane Date _and found that it's tradition that when anyone does that thing where they clink their champagne glass that the bride and groom had to kiss. My master plan was to do it so much that she wouldn't be able to make her speech. It was long and boring and she babbled on constantly about them being two minds and one soul or whatever," I rolled my eyes. "I had to listen to it once on the night before her wedding and I refused to do it again," I giggled.

"So, what happened next?" He asked, his voice full of amusement had he tucked his arms under the blanket and wrapped his arms around me.

I chuckled. "My aunt had to pry the glass from my hands after the tenth time after Sissy threatened to shove it somewhere anatomically impossible. It was a good day," I sighed.

It felt good to be in Edwards arms, natural even. I could see that he had been a little unsure of my reaction when he had held out his arms for me to sit on his lap, but I had smiled and snuggled into the warmth of his body.

"How?" He demanded.

"Well, they both refused to speak to me for about a month after. I didn't have to listen to that god awful speech again and I didn't have to speak to them. Like I said, good day."

Edward chuckled. "You were a bad girl, huh?" He teased.

I just laughed at rolled my eyes. "Oh yeah. That's me, bad to the bone."

"I like this," he murmured. "I like being able to hold you. Why are you letting me?" He asked curiously.

I looked up at him and smiled. "I told you that I'd try to be in a relationship with you. I want to be in one with you. I won't always be good at this, but I think I can handle being in your arms. It's not such a bad place to be," I shrugged.

"It isn't for me, either." He told me.

We sat there for the rest of the night; talking until the sun rose and we fell asleep in each other arms.

* * *

It had been two days since Edward and I had kissed and fallen asleep in each other arms.

He had woken me up the next day with the sweetest kiss and had gone inside for breakfast and planned our day together. We were going to go for a picnic and even maybe go into town tonight for an actual date. This time it would be real.

Unfortunately, he had gotten a call saying that there was some emergency in the next town over and all hands were needed and since Edward was Sheriff, he had to go and help out.

We hadn't spoken since.

He'd text me when he could, telling me how everything was going and saying that he wished he could actually talk to me, but we seemed to be missing each other's calls. I had thought it would have been good, get a little distance and sort through everything I was feeling, but I missed him and I wanted to see him.

It was strange to me, but I felt lonely without him here to talk to. I hadn't felt lonely for years; I hadn't allowed myself to be.

I sighed as I entered Alice's store. I found it funny that I walked into the boutique like it was the most natural thing in the world. If you had told me this three weeks ago, I would have told you to share whatever it is you were smoking.

Jessica saw me as I entered the store and scowled before she pasted on her big, bright smile.

"Bella, how are you?"

"I'm fine, Jessica, thank you. How are you?" I asked politely, hiding my clenched fist in my pockets. I had read in my current book, _The Return _that you should never show your enemies your fear. I took that to heart.

"I'm very good, thank you. Thing's couldn't be better. I hear that Sheriff Cullen is still Roberts Mill." Her words were casual, but her tone was anything but. She had heard about me punching Edward and wanted gossip.

"Yes, some children have gone missing and everyone's out looking for them." I answered her.

"Oh! It's awful, isn't it? Have you spoken with Sheriff Cullen?"

"Jess!" Alice interrupted with a cheerful smile, that I knew what fake. "A delivery has just arrived; can you help them out, please?"

"Sure thing, Alice." She answered, her shoulders drooping with disappointment.

I smiled at Alice who returned my smile with a wink as she made her way over to me.

"And to what do I owe this pleasure? No offense, but I kind of got the idea that you were a bit of a recluse over the years who wanted nothing to do with us town folk." She chuckled.

I scowled at her. "Wanting privacy is not a crime." I pointed out righteously.

Alice just rolled her eyes. "Are you going to tell me?"

I glanced around uncomfortably. "Mrs. Tucker is out of town visiting some relatives and..."

The smile that lit up her face could have live up the entire state. "And you miss Edward! That boys growing on you, huh?" She chuckled in glee.

"I didn't come here to be made fun of." I snarled at her.

My tone didn't affect her in anyway. "I'm not making fun of you I just think it's amazing! Why don't you give him a call?" She suggested.

I pouted. "I can't. He's really busy and the last thing he needs is me turning all needy on him."

That sobered her up. "I seriously doubt that will happen. Edward loves you, Bella. He does want to hear from you."

I sighed. "I can't. It's selfish of me to want his attention when he's actually helping people." I shrugged my shoulders miserably. "I guess text messages will have to do for now."

Alice smiled and pulled me into her arms. "I'm so happy for you, Bella."

I wrapped my arms around her small frame and smiled. "I'm happy for me, too."

Later that night, I was in the library, waiting until closing time so I could go home and eat my weight in chocolate when I heard the bell over the door jingle.

Huh, I thought with surprise. We hardly had anyone come in.

One of the reasons I had taken the job in the library was that it was dead in here and rarely had to deal with people. No one was interested in libraries any more; you could get the same information off the internet as you did in the local library. Some people wanted the library torn down, but Mrs. Tucker had gone what she called 'batshit crazy' and called them all illiterate morons who were too ignorant to appreciate books. Very little meant much to Mrs. Tucker since her husband died, but the library was her home and she loved it.

I flipped the page to the current romance novel I was reading, another perk of working at a library, and didn't pay attention to whoever had strolled in. If it was rare for people to come into the library then it was once in a blue freakin' moon for anyone to actually check one out.

"Excuse me miss, do you happen to have a book I'm looking for. It's called _Dating For Dummies_."

My head shot up at the familiar voice and I couldn't help the smile at that lit my face.

Before I could speak, he continued. "You see, I had this date a couple of days ago and it ended really badly."

I had to bite my lip to keep from laughing; I liked this playful, flirtatious version of him and couldn't help but join in.

"Oh really?" I answered flirtatiously. I hoped it was working, I hadn't flirted in years. "How bad?"

In reply he pointed to his fading black eyes.

I winced in sympathy. "That is the end to a bad date." I agreed.

"Yeah, well I did deserve it and I was hoping that with the help of this book that just maybe we could do better the second time around."

I raised my eyebrows. "She's giving you a second chance? She must be a pretty amazing person."

He smirked, his eyes dancing with laughter. "Oh, she is. She's funny and sweet and she is as sexy as hell," he added in a husky whisper.

I nodded slowly. "Have you asked her about this date yet?"

He grimaced. "Well, after I spent the night at hers," he winked at me when I rolled my eyes, "I did bring something up but I haven't seen or spoken to her in days." He pouted, which was most likely the most adorable thing I had seen in my life.

I winced. "Well, there is a good chance she may not even go with you. She may have used the time apart to realize that she's better off with a guy who she won't feel the need to beat up at the end of her date."

It was his turn to scowl at me before giving me that cocky smirk. "Oh, she will," He assured me with confidence that bordered on arrogance. "She thinks I'm sexy," He shrugged his shoulders.

"She does?" I choked.

"Oh yeah," he drawled. "I know these things."

"Doubtful," I retorted.

He leaned forward with a smile. "So, miss random librarian, would you go on a date with me if I asked?"

I frowned. "I don't know. Would I end up smacking you one at the end of the night? That hurts your hand, you know," I smiled.

"I can promise you that you will be so swept off your feet that punching me will be the last thing on your mind."

I smiled. "Okay. You can pick me up at seven."

He grinned in triumph as he leaned into kiss me. Finally.

"I missed you," he whispered.

"I missed you, too." I admitted to him. I didn't feel uncomfortable admitting that I had missed him.

"Tomorrow?" He asked.

"Tomorrow."

**A/N**** There you have it party people! Tomorrow is their first official date. No lies, no secrets and both parties will be aware of the fact that they are on a date. Please review.**


	8. Chapter 8

**A/N ****Hi! You are all uber amazing and I love you all! Thank you all so much for your wonderful reviews, you rock!**

**Please review!**

**BPOV**

"How do I look?" I asked the girls as I finished brushing down my blouse.

This time I had decided to go with a white silky blouse and skin tight jeans that I could barely breathe in. Alice had crammed yet another pair of heels on me, but had 'sexed' them up since we knew that this was an actual date now. I was meant to look sexy.

The cat's lifted their heads in unison and gave me an unimpressed glance before dropping their heads back onto the bed.

I rolled my heads. "Just remember who feeds you, ladies." I growled as I turned to the floor length mirror and fluffed my hair one last time before spraying perfume onto my wrists.

I had been a nervous wreck all day. It had been fun and even sexy flirting with Edward last night, but now it was here and I was going on an actual date with Edward Cullen.

I was going to be sick.

Last night, Edward had been so cute, waiting for me to close up and walking me to my car with one last parting sexy kiss that made my knees weak and my heart try to leap from my chest. He had informed me that they had found the missing children and I noticed a flicker of something in Edwards eyes, something big, but he seemed uncomfortable when Id asked so I'd let it drop. Edward had his right for privacy and me of all people should respect that. I knew it was something big, though, something that hurt him and I promised myself that whenever he was ready to talk, I would be there for him.

No matter how disastrous this date may be.

Though I would never admit this to him, I'm thinking the whole 'easing me into dating' thing was a good idea. I was a mess today, I didn't want to know what I would have been like if I hadn't already had a mock date.

I had rushed into town before the library was due to open and barely glanced at Jessica before filling Alice in on my fashion troubles and my worries. She had just grinned and pulled out a bag that had an entire outfit already picked out for me. She was amazing!

_"Bella, you need to calm down. The man said he loves you for crying out loud," She burst out as I paced back and forth her store, coffee in hand._

_"Really? Well, you just wait until he sees me in full force! What if I have a panic attack? I've had them before, Alice, it's possible! What if people stare and I'm too worried about them that I complete make an ass out of myself with Edward?" I paused as a horrifying thought came to me. "What if I fall over? Those heels you got in that bag are death traps. That's it, where are you flats?" I demanded as I stormed over to her shoe section._

_Alice ran over and threw her body in front of mine like I was going to hurt her precious shoes._

_"Bella, Edward knows that you have problems with crowds. He's not going to expect you to break out into song or join a flash mob with any of them. He loves you and he just wants to spend time with you and most likely show you off a little. He. Loves. You," She said forcefully._

_I nodded my head shakily and backed away from the ballet pumps._

_"Besides," She began, rolling her shoulders, "flats wouldn't make your ass look as good as the heels will."_

_I had stared at her with a dead panned expression until I couldn't take it anymore and burst out laughing._

I had been good to laugh and share fun with Alice before my date.

The only problem was that the effect of Alice's exuberance had worn off throughout the day and when I'd gotten a text from Edward saying he couldn't wait for tonight and how I would be all his, I had almost broke the phone in two.

I didn't know how to date!

Before it had been fake, or at least I thought it had, and now I knew it wasn't and I was flipping out.

Please God, I prayed, don't let me make a fool of myself or embarrass Edward by hyperventilating.

I put a folded up paper bag in my pocket, just in case.

**EPOV**

I pulled up outside Bella's house at seven sharp. I had been looking forward to this date all day.

I remembered my first date when I was fourteen and how nervous I'd been, but excited at the same time. Her name had been Angela Weber and we had gone for ice cream at the local diner. She hadn't accepted my invitation for a second date, but I still looked on those memories and smiled. I had come a long way, but with Bella I still got those butterflies I hadn't had since I was fourteen.

Emmett had accused me of being bipolar and I didn't blame him. A few days ago I had been walking round like a bear with a sore tooth... and a black eye. Then we had gone to Roberts Mill and I'd been obsessed with finding those children, vowing I would never let another child down. Then when we'd gotten home I had been too eager to see Bella to care about anything that was going on and boy did she look pretty sitting there in a deserted library, lost in her own world. Then today I had practically been bouncing off the walls, excited about our date tonight.

Eventually, he'd given in and told me to text me my mood from now on so he could be prepared.

Before I could get out of the car and knock on her door, Bella came rushing from the house and jumped into the passenger seat.

She looked damn sexy in a flimsy white blouse and jeans that fit her like a second skin, letting me see every curve of her shapely legs and hips.

"Hi," She greeted with a squeak as she threw me a smile.

I frowned at her tone, but had a more pressing matter to discuss.

"You were meant to wait for me in the house," I reprimanded. "I was going to knock on your door and woo you." I teased, but she didn't smile like I thought she would.

Instead she shrugged her shoulders slightly. "I thought it would save time."

Frowning, I started the engine and drove onto the main road, hoping she would tell me what was on her mind. Instead of talking to me about what was bothering her, we just sat there in an awkward silence.

I knew she had to be nervous, but we'd been on a date just a few days ago and she hadn't been this nervous. I'd kissed her, teased her, flirted with her and held her in my arms all night and she hadn't reacted like this. I was starting to worry.

"What's wrong?" I asked when we pulled up outside the bar we had gone a few nights before. Bella had said she's like to go back, she had enjoyed it.

She sighed deeply before turning to face me.

"I'm nervous!" She burst out.

I smiled at her. I had thought it might be this, but normally she was more vocal about what was bothering, I had started to begin to think that she was having second thoughts. "Why?"

"It's our first date," She pointed out like I was a complete moron.

I couldn't help but laugh. "No, it's not! It's our second date. You know what happens on the third date, don't you?" I wagged my eyebrows evilly.

She scowled. "Dream on, sunshine," she snapped. "The last time we were here I didn't know we were on an actual date, and I was nervous even then!" She pouted which I found utterly adorable.

"Bella," I murmured, pulling her over to sit on my lap. "We have already been on a date. We've already kissed and spent the night rocking on your front porch in the rain, wrapped up in each other's arms. We've already had a talk about what we're doing here and what we want." I chuckled. "Bella, we've already discussed what takes most couple's month's to figure out." I said gently as I ran my fingers through her silky hair and then moving down to rub soothing circles in her back, loving the shiver of awareness that it brought to her.

I had a feeling that Bella was a very passionate person, which was proven to me more day by day and I knew it would cross over into the bedroom. I wanted that part of our relationship to happen soon, but I knew it would take Bella time to get there. It was alright, though, we had time.

"Everyone will be staring at us, just like last time." She pouted and I wanted to take a bit out of her.

"Noticed that did you?" I cringed. I had thought she hadn't noticed all the stares and whispers.

She looked at me with an expression that said 'Duh!"

I couldn't help but laugh. "Honey, people will talk and look, but I promise the only person I'll see is you."

Bella giggled and pulled my mouth to hers in a sweet kiss.

"That was incredibly corny, but sweet all the same." She laughed as her eyes shined in the darkness.

I wasn't ready to end the kiss and buried my fingers in her soft hair and pulled her mouth back to mine, wishing Id shaved.

She didn't seem to mind, though. She ran her fingers across my stubbled jaw, her touch as light as a seductive whisper as if she loved how I made her feel. I sure it was good.

Reluctantly, I pulled my mouth away from hers, both of us gasping for breath.

"Come on, someone's bound to see us and the last thing I need is to be the first Sheriff arrested for parking." I joked when really if it meant I could spend more time in the heaven with her, I'd gladly lock myself up.

She laughed and ran her fingers against my jaw, something she seemed to like to do. "You wish." She giggled as she climbed back into the passenger seat and got out of the car.

I took a deep breath and then another. My body was hard and hot and it hurt like hell. I rubbed my hand over my face roughly, trying to calm my raging body.

Damn that woman was amazing; I'd never reacted this way to a kiss before. Ever.

"Edward, are you coming?" She asked from the sidewalk.

I let my head fall back against the head rest. "Give me a minute."

Even though I should have been annoyed, I couldn't help but smile as I heard her laughter at my expense.

* * *

We entered the bar and I could almost feel the eyes that were burning into the back of our heads as our highly amused waitress, Kate, showed us to out booth, winking at Bella as she left.

"I seem to be a bit of a celebrity," She commented dryly as she waved weakly to Kate as she sashayed back to the bar where she began giggling with the other waitresses.

I smirked at her. "Well, you did give the new hot Sheriff a black eye."

She raised her eyebrows, her dark eyes dancing with laughter. "Hot? Who said anything about hot?"

I winked at her as I reached across and held her hand in mine. "I'm a catch, you know."

She rolled her eyes. "Oh god."

We spent the next half an hour talking, drinking and laughing. To my utter surprise Bella ate more than I did and was now scanning the menu for desert so she could her 'chocolate fix'. I was two seconds away from unbuttoning my pants like my grandpa used to.

"Oh, double chocolate fudge brownie. Nice," She nodded appreciatively.

I couldn't help but stare at her, the way the soft lighting hit her hair made it look like silk. How her eyes lit up when she saw something she was interested in and nodded her head slightly.

I liked that she ate; it always freaked me out when girls ordered salad and pretended like they were stuffed. How could you not enjoy food? My mom cooked constantly and thought every situation could be settled over a good meal. Your girlfriend dumped you? I'll fix you lasagna. You think you failed that test? I'll fix you a roast dinner. I had always joked that I was lucky I had been skinny and gangly as a child, because if I hadn't I wouldn't have been able to fit through the door. I had actually put on a few pounds since coming home.

I glanced up and saw Emmett and Jasper enter the bar and scowled. Earlier today they had teased me about the fact that they didn't believe Bella was actually going out on a date with me, since they had never actually met her. They thought I'd either made up the fact that we were on a date, or I'd made her up all together.

"What's wrong?" Bella demanded when she heard my soft curse.

"Nothing," I smiled, trying not to worry her when I saw them take a seat at the bar.

"Edward," She warned with a frown.

I sighed, giving up. Hopefully, she wouldn't take it badly and freak on me. If she did I was going to arrest them for being assholes.

"My friend Emmett and Jasper just came in. They think I'm making the date up," I explained and rolled my eyes.

I saw her eyes flicker to the bar and take in my two best friends, who I was going to kill as soon as I dropped Bella off at home.

I saw as she tried to calm herself down at the thought of meeting more new people and felt awful. I never really fully understood what she must go through every day just to come into town, never mind walk in here and feel like she was sitting in a fish bowl.

"We can leave, Bella." I told her.

I watched as she squared her shoulders. "No." She spoke firmly. "Call them over," She ordered with a nod.

I felt my jaw drop. "What?"

She glanced at me and smiled. "Didn't expect that, did you? Edward, I am really nervous, I won't lie, but if we're going to try and have a real relationship then I have to meet them eventually, right? You told me that these men were like your brothers."

I felt love swell up inside me and threaten to overwhelm me. She was so brave. She sat there, fidgeting she was so nervous, but stood her ground.

I brought her hand to my mouth and kissed her hand tenderly. "You're amazing, you know that?"

She chuckled. "I try."

I looked over at Emmett and Jasper and nodded for them to come over, before turning back to Bella.

"If you want to leave, just give me the word and we're out of here."

She rolled her eyes. "I at least want to try and make a good impression, Edward. I can't exactly just tell you I want to leave." She protested.

"Fine, just cough twice or something and I'll make up an excuse."

Her shoulders slumped. "You know, if you had a normal girlfriend, you wouldn't have to worry any of this."

I held back my smile. She had called herself my girlfriend. I liked it. "I don't want normal. And Bella, we're not trying to have a relationship. We're in a relationship."

I watched as her eyes glazed over with tears before she blinked them away and nodded her head with a small smile.

I was humbled by the emotion I saw in her eyes. Though I knew Bella cared for me, the fact that she hadn't actually told me how she felt after I'd said I loved her had started to worry me. I knew she cared and I knew she wanted me, or she wouldn't have agreed to come here or even have me in her life, but no matter what we said, guys needed the words too. I had worried because she hadn't said anything, but seeing her eyes soften, fill with tears and a smile she only shared with me, and it was worth all the words in the world.

We both got to our feet to greet my soon to be dead friends.

"Your dead," I greeted them both with a smile as I gave each of them what only could be described as a 'man hug'.

"What?" Emmett chuckled. "We wanted to see if she was real. Or if not that, that we didn't have to get a restraining order against you. So," He said turning to Bella. "She's beautiful and way too good for you." He winked at her, making her blush.

"Emmett," I growled.

He turned to smirk at me. "There's nothing wrong with a little friendly competition, Eddie."

"Eddie?" Bella giggled.

Part of me was glad to see her laugh and know that Emmett's childish ways had actually made her more comfortable around him. The other part of me, the insane jealous part, didn't want her to share laughter with anyone else.

"A nickname he absolutely despises. If he ever annoys you, just call him that. Shut's him right up." He advised her.

"I'll keep that in mind. So you're Emmett. You're big." She smiled.

Emmett threw his head back and laughter, getting the attention of everyone who wasn't already watching the conversation intently.

"You're adorable." He winked at her as he shook her hand.

"I'm Jasper; it's a pleasure to meet you, Bella."

"Oh, so you're Jasper," She muttered to herself, before nodding in response to whatever thought she'd had before looking up at him with a smile. "It's nice to meet you. Would you like to join us for a drink?" She offered.

I coughed conspicuously into my hand; our sign for bail and Bella smiled at me.

Emmett and Jasper grinned evilly at me as I continued to cough.

"We'd love to." They answered in unison.

**BPOV**

"I like your friends."

"They're alright," Edward groaned as he pulled up outside my house, rain pounding against the windows, reminding of that moment Jurassic Park just before the dinosaurs came and started killing everyone.

I had actually enjoyed myself tonight. Emmett and Jasper were hilarious and sweet and had a never ending supply of embarrassing stories about Edward and his high school years, including one where he had been sure he would lose his virginity with Leah Clearwater and had gotten a drink thrown in his face instead.

When he'd first told me about his friends being in the bar my mind had gone into panic mode. Would they like me? Would I say the wrong thing? Would I have a panic attack and need the paper bag in my pocket? Would I embarrass Edward? The latter had been what had worried me the most.

I shouldn't have worried. Edward's friends were amazing. They were funny and sweet and made me feel comfortable around them. I didn't get the feeling that they were watching me or waiting for me to do something weird. They were treating me like Edward's girlfriend and that's exactly how I had dreamed they would.

"You didn't have to make them leave," I told him honestly. I hadn't minded them being there with us. It was nice to see Edward with his friends.

Edward threw me a grin. "Yes, I did. Tonight was about spending time with you, not them. I see them too much as it is."

"I can see what you mean about Jasper. Four women must have tried to flirt with them tonight, but it was like they hadn't even existed. I like that."

It was true. Women had come up to the handsome blond man across from me, but he'd just politely brushed them off and turned back to us. Emmett had whispered a joke about his balls exploding and had gotten a punch to the arm in return.

Edward nodded as he held my hand between us. "He's always been like that. Emmett jokes that he'll spontaneously combust if he doesn't get laid soon," Edward as he rolled his eyes, which told me exactly what he thought of Edwards's voice.

"But he won't." I stated.

Edward smiled. "No, he won't. Alice has had his heart before he even understood what love was. He's not about to destroy that for a quick roll across the sheets. He's the type of man that everyone woman wants and he doesn't want them." He chuckled.

I leaned over to trace his strong stubbled jaw with my fingertips. "Not every woman." I disagreed.

He turned to me with a frown before he understood what I meant. "Really?" He asked softly.

"I don't want Jasper. I want you. Thank you for tonight, Edward. I hadn't known that I could have so much fun with these two big burly guys who I'd never met before, but I did. It's all because of you, because you were there with me. I can't tell you how much that means."

He grinned. "What that I can make you feel comfortable talking with other guys. I'm not sure that's something I want you to be comfortable with to be honest," He teased.

I shoved his shoulder, but he grabbed onto my hand and pulled my back so he could press his lips to mine.

"I like the fact that you like my friends." He whispered before pulling me back into a slow kiss that had my heart pounding and my knees weak.

"I have to go," I panted pulling my mouth from his and shoving the passenger door open.

"Hey, I'm meant to walk you to the door!" He protested.

I stood there in the pouring rain and looked at him. His hair damp from out run to the car in the rain, his cheeks flushed from our kiss and his eyes filled with a desire that matched my own.

I knew that if he walked me to the door tonight, he wouldn't be leaving and it was the first date and all...

"Soon." I promised and ran into the rain, feeling his eyes on me as I went. It was a wonderful feeling.

Soon, I promised myself.

**A/N**** There you go my wonderful ones. Question? Do you think it's too early for a little fruitiness?**


	9. Chapter 9

**A/N**** Okay, so I wrote most of this after a very interesting dream the other night... let's just say I had inspiration! With a little help from Christine Feehan and it's done! I hope you like it and please review and let me know! Oh and to Amelia, thank you for all your wonderful reviews and I don't know what that twitter thingy you were on about means... I've only just worked out Facebook!**

**BPOV**

"This is totally unrealistic," Edward whispered from the seat beside me.

I rolled my eyes dramatically. "Yeah, I get it. You do realize you've been whispering that since the movie came on, right?"

Edward reached over to steal my perfect mixture of Skittles and M 'n' M's, ignoring my hand as I tried to bat him away. He chose popcorn; he should stick to his decision.

"I know, but come on! Who lures a girl into the woods and then admits he wants to kill her? And what batshit crazy girl actually stays?"

I growled, actually growled. Something's were near and dear and you did not question and you definitely did not mock!

"First off, she lured him into the woods and secondly, it's love." I snapped and saw a man one seat down from us snicker as he eavesdropped shamelessly on our conversation.

"Love," Edward scoffed. "What girl would fall in love with a guy who wants to kill her? Don't they have better standards?"

"Hey! He's a catch. When I was in the asylum you should have seen the whack jobs that were there. Myself not included." I joked and noticed Edward tense up.

Edward didn't like it when I made jokes about being locked up with the mentally unbalanced. He didn't even know the details, just that I shouldn't have been there and it had been a big step in cutting me off from society.

It had been two weeks since our first date and Edward and I were enjoying my favorite movie _Twilight,_ with the last film coming out every movie theatre in the country was running the movie. Edward had pre-ordered tickets for us the day after it was released. Id shown him my print out of my pre-ordered tickets for the night it was released and then informed him that he would be coming with me both times to watch it. He had growled until Id pointed out that we'd be in the dark movie theatre... What I didn't tell him, and what he didn't expect, was the fact that I would be too engrossed by the movie to pay attention to him.

"I'm just saying," He grumbled.

I turned to him. "Edward, honey, I love that we're here to together and we can share one of my favorite movies, but if you don't shut up I'll drown you in your popcorn and I won't regret it."

He grinned and leaned into kiss me. "I love you too, baby." He chuckled and crashed back into his seat, wrapping his arm around my shoulder and pulling toward him.

The last two weeks had been amazing. We spent pretty much all of our time together whether it was at the bar where I had become a proud local of, my house or even at the movies. Edward was... he was perfect. He would pick me up for dates and spend the entire time sweeping me off my feet with his charm and his humor and his heart. The one thing I never had to doubt about Edward was that he had a good heart.

I loved spending time with him. I dressed up for him, when I'd never imagined that to be possible. He made me feel like I was fifteen again. Not in the fact that I was acting like a love-struck teenager, which I was, but he made me feel like my past didn't exist. That I was a normal woman in her twenties who had fallen for the man beside her.

I loved Edward. I didn't know when it began or how it was even possible since I was so certain that I could never love another man again, but it was true. I loved him. It was more than I had ever felt for anyone. It was big and scary and yet safe at the same time because the man I loved was Edward and he would always keep me safe.

* * *

"You talking to me yet?" Edward asked as we pulled up outside of my house, the rain once again thundering outside. I didn't mind. I liked the rain.

"You got us through out of the movies." I snapped as I unbuckled my seat belt.

"It was that ladies fault," he defended himself.

"You wouldn't shut up talking! Every five seconds you just had to open your mouth. If she didn't threaten to kick your ass then I was going to." I growled.

Thrown out of a movie theatre? I didn't think that was even possible.

About ten minutes after the main character had found out that her love was an immortal vampire; Edward had started up with his stupid ass commentaries, annoying everyone in the theatre. Eventually, a middle aged woman wearing a _'Real Men Sparkle'_ t-shirt had threatened to kick the shit out of him if he didn't shut up. The Edward had gone all Sheriff Cullen on her and babbled on about threatening a police officer, trying to act big, I suspect.

What Edward clearly didn't realize is that _Twilighters_ aren't a normal race of people. If they will push past security to take over a hotel or chase Robert Pattinson down the street, then the last thing they're going to care about is Sheriff Cullen flashing his badge.

I had stormed out of the movie theatre; reading to walk home until he had pointed out it was raining and dragged me by my jacket to his car. I had gotten in and gave him the silent treatment for the entire journey home in full pout mode.

"Come on, Bella, I'm sorry," He said with a pout that I couldn't resist.

I felt my lips twitch as I desperately tried not to smile at the huge man next to me, an officer of the law who had almost gotten his ass handed to him earlier, was pouting like a teenage girl.

"Why should I forgive you? You got us thrown out of my favorite movie."

Before I knew what was happening, Edward had unbuckled his seat belt and had moved so he was wedged in front of me. It must have been uncomfortable. He was a big guy.

"You should forgive me because I'm sorry," He whispered as he brushed his lips lightly against mine. "And also because I find you incredibly sexy when you're angry."

"Edward," I warned him.

"It's just a kiss, Bella. I'm not going to drag you off by your hair to my cave where I can tie you up for weeks. Though, I will admit the idea does have possibilities."

I grinned as I ran my hands over his chest. "You into the caveman thing, huh?"

The breath rushed out of me as his tongue traced my ear, his hands roaming over my body. "Only when it comes to you."

I sighed as I gave myself up to Edwards touch. He had wonderful hands...

That was another thing that was great about him; he made me hotter than hell. Another thing I never thought possible, but I did. I wanted him.

"Edward," I whispered as his kisses moved to my neck, spreading goose bumps along my skin.

"Yeah, baby," he whispered absently, his mind elsewhere.

I tried to speak three times, but whenever I felt his velvet tongue touch my skin, I lost all thought and my ability to speak. With great effort, I gripped his hair in my hands and pulled until he yelped and jolted back to look at me.

"What's wrong?" He panted; obviously worried in case he had crossed a line.

"I want you to stay the night," I whispered.

His face would have been hilarious if I wasn't so turned on. Jaw slack and eyes huge, he stared me as if Id grown two heads.

"You want me to stay?" He asked meaningfully.

I smiled and leaned in to trace my fingers over his jaw as I spoke to him, telling myself to be myself and be honest.

"I had sex once. It wasn't good and I didn't think I'd ever want to repeat it, but I do. I want you, Edward. I want you more than I want to breathe." I said as I pulled his mouth back down to mine in a deep kiss as I moved my body sensually against his so he had no doubt in his mind what I wanted.

"Bella," He whispered as he pulled away. "You have to be sure."

I nodded my head shakily. "I am. I love you, Edward. I trust you. I want you. Right now."

His smiled was slow and sexy. "You love me?"

Again, I nodded my head. "I do. Don't me make me wait."

"Never."

* * *

Edward and I crashed through the door, uncaring that we were wet and probably just broke my screen door.

When I had told Edward that I wanted him, he had shoved open the passenger side door and jumped out, lifting me into his arms, my legs wrapped around his waist deliciously as he carried me in the rain. So sexy.

Never breaking the kiss, Edward pushed me up against the wall and devoured me. It was like I had flipped the Edward switch and he's gone from sweet, affable guy who had gotten into a tiff with a woman at the movies, to a man with only one thing on his mind. This wasn't the Edward I was used to. He was dominant. His hands all over me, his mouth... It was sexy as hell.

"Take off your clothes," He ordered roughly as he stepped back to watch me.

A part of me said that I should run screaming, that this was too much too soon, but then this other part of me told me to shut the hell up. That this was what I wanted and the man in front of me wasn't the boy I had once been with. What I did with Edward would be beautiful and sexy and I was protected.

Knowing that, I slowly pulled my shirt over my head to expose my body to Edward, shoving my jeans over my hips and stepping out of them until the only thing I wore were my underwear and not sexy ones at that. I had wanted Edward; I hadn't planned to seduce him tonight, though.

"Take them off," He ordered, his eyes devouring me and making me ache in places I hadn't known could ache.

Never taking my eyes away from him, I shed the rest of my clothes until I was completely bare to him. Completely exposed.

As if in a trance, he took a step toward me and raised his and to my skin.

"So soft," He whispered as he trailed his fingers down the valley between my breasts before drifting over my skin to trace around my nipple, bringing the sensitive area to a hard peak.

"So sexy," he added as his fingers made their way down my stomach, my muscles bunching under his sensuous touch, until he came to my most sensitive area his fingers lingering and bringing me to a state I had never known, breathless, my body raging with need as I begged him to take me over the edge.

"Mine," he growled as his fingers entered me, stroking, deeper and deeper as I clutched on to him, riding his hand almost helplessly as he bent his head to take my breast into his mouth, the motion of his tongue in sync with that of his long fingers.

"Come for me, Bella. Show me how good I make you feel."

Helpless to do anything other than what he demanded, I came, calling his name in ecstasy.

Before I could catch my breath, his mouth covered mine in a deep, hot kiss that made my body ache for him all over again

"Unzip me, baby," he whispered against my mouth.

I pried my hands away from his shirt and trailed my hands down his stomach, loving the way his body jolted at my touch.

When I came to zip on his jeans, my eyes met his before I rubbed my hand over the thick bulge through the material of his jeans, his body shuddering in pleasure.

He crushed my body to his, his hips moving against my hand. "Oh god," He breathed and I had never felt more powerful in my entire life as I slowly unzipped him and pushed his jeans down his hips as he kicked off his shoes so he could step out of his jeans easily whilst tears his shirt over his head.

"I want to feel your hands on me, Bella. Now."

I shuddered at the hoarse demand and the fire that was in his eyes as I took his heavy erection into my hand and wrapped my fingers around him with enough pressure to almost bring him to his peak and I began to move my hand in slow, sensuous movements.

Edward growled, he sounding so foreign to me, not at all like to soft sweet man he always was around me, but like a predator and god help me, but I loved it. I loved that just my touch could destroy all of his control and turn him into a man who just needed. Like he did with me.

He pressed a kiss to my neck, then licked and teasingly bite at my sensitive skin, making me lose my concentration as my body tingled with a inexplicable need for him.

His growl brought me back and the way he tightened his arms around me as a reminder.

"I want you, Edward. Now." I whispered as I nipped at his stubble jaw and grinded my hips against his, making both of us groan in pleasure.

Edward looked into my eyes and without so much as a word, he pushed me up against the wall, his hands pinning mine above me so I couldn't do anything but stand there and lose myself, give myself wholly to him and his hot, wet mouth as he sucked and licked my skin until I thought I would spontaneously combust.

His thigh separated my legs and I couldn't help the movements against him as I tried to give my body what is so desperately needed.

He chuckled. "You are ready for me."

When he pulled away, I whimpered. "Patience, love," He whispered as he kissed me, his tongue thrusting into my mouth, moving in the rhythm of long, hot sex before tearing his mouth away from mine with a curse as he reached inside his jeans and yanked out his wallet.

I didn't even mention the fact that he had been a little arrogant and presumptuous to bring a condom. Not when he was right. Also, the thought of condoms and what they meant brought up bad memories and I closed my eyes against them, not wanting to ruin this moment.

"You want to move this to the bedroom?" He whispered.

I shook my head. I didn't want to wait. Besides, anything I did with Edward was beautiful, the location wouldn't change that.

Edward smiled as he pulled me over to the fire place.

"Lie down on your back," He ordered gently and I found myself helpless to do anything but obey him in that moment.

I lay back and watched as his eyes drifted over my body, feeling like a caress as I shifted restlessly against the soft rug.

Edward smiled before turning away to light the fire, brining into to a burn before turning back to me and lowering himself down to the rug.

"I don't care where we do this; standing up, sitting down, on our heads," He chuckled. "But it should be special," He whispered as he trailed his fingers over my hip. "I want it to be special. We have plenty of time for the other stuff later," He promised with a wicked grin.

"Edward," I whispered as I ran my hands across his bare chest.

"What?" He whispered as he lowered his mouth to kiss along my color bone.

"Make me yours."

He pulled back to look into my eyes, his eyes filled with hunger and love and possession.

"You are mine."

He raised his body over mine, reaching for the foil packet that I pulled out of his hands, tearing it and the rolling it onto him, as he closed his eyes and groaned, his jerking with the touch of my hands.

"Your mine," He repeated as he entered me slowly, inch by inch until my body had adjusted to him and I was moving restlessly, wanting, needing him to move.

"Mine," He repeated like a litany and he thrust, strong and slow and I couldn't stop my moans of pleasure, I didn't want to.

I threw my head back as he sucked my nipple into his mouth as his thrusts became faster, harder and I begged him to never stop.

I brought my head up to kiss his chest, his neck, wherever I could, I just wanted to be surrounded my hip.

"You are so hot, so tight," He whispered against my skin as I clutched on to him.

My bond was winding tighter and tighter, the pleasure I felt becoming more intense with every stroke, until I was a blabbering mess and begging for him.

His thrusts pounded into me as we both fell over the edge, our bodies fragmenting in a mind blowing orgasm that knocked the wind out of both of us as we lay there, exhausted.

"Mine," He repeated as he kissed my wet skin.

"Yours," I told him.

I was his.

* * *

_I was sleeping when I felt the hand in my hair, yanking and pulling until I was on my bedroom floor._

_"What's going on?" I mumbled in panic before I was being dragged to my feet my hard hands, hands that gripped me so tight that I knew bruises were forming._

_"Come on, Izzy, we're going to play a little game." A menacing voice whispered in my ear._

_"No!"_

"Bella! Bella, stop!"

I heard Edward's voice, but I couldn't stop. I was lost in a dream, in a memory and I couldn't get out of it as I struggled in Edwards arms, not comprehending that it was him that was trying to hold me down, not him.

"No!" I screamed as I clawed his skin with my nails, desperate to get away, to not go in that room and watch as my life was destroyed.

"Bella, it's me!" He called as he pinned my arms down.

Eventually, I came out of my daze like I did every night and saw Edward looming above me, his eyes full of compassion and fear.

"Edward?" I whispered.

He smiled as he released my wrists to pull me into his arms, stroking back my hair. "Yes, baby, it's me. I got you. No one will ever hurt you again. I promise."

For a moment, his promise meant everything and my heart began to slow. That was until his hissed as my long hair caught in the torn flesh on his chest. Flesh that I had torn with my nails to get away from him. I had done that. I had hurt Edward.

I wrenched myself out of his arms like he had burned me. "You need to leave," I mumbled as I got to my feet, uncaring that I was naked.

"What?" He demanded with a frown. "I'm not leaving you." He glanced down at the long scratches that I'd made in his skin. "Bella, this is nothing. I'm fine."

"Just go. Please just go." I begged as I ran into the bathroom and locked the door.

I heard him call out my name before trying to get into the locked bathroom door. I slumped down and brought my knees up to my chest as I heard the echo of his voice in my mind, telling me we were going to play a game.

Would he ever truly leave me alone?

**A/N**** There you go my babies! I hope you enjoyed it! Yes, it went from sweet to sexy to shitty in one chapter! Please review!**


	10. Chapter 10

**A/N**** Hey everyone! Thank you all again! You are awesome! I love how you all have such faith in Edward and his ability to calm her down. Also thank you to those who said that the last chapter was hot****...**** Thank you! This chapter we get to see about Bella's past and it's kind of split into two parts. So, please read and review!**

**EPOV**

"Bella, sweetie, please come out," I pleaded as I knocked gently against the bathroom door. She'd been in there for twenty minutes and I couldn't stand to hear her tears anymore.

I was such a fucking idiot!

The night had been perfect, getting thrown out of the movies and threatened by a middle aged woman aside, but then Bella had told me she wanted me. That she loved me. She had let me into her heart and trusted me with her body and boy what a body she had. Skin as soft as silk with full curves and the most beautiful reactions to my touch. I had been with other women before, but none compared to her, or how it felt to know that it was her in my arms. The night had been wonderful.

It was a few hours later that I woke up to a dimming fire and Bella's warm body. I was about to think of a more interesting way to way her up when she started to mumble something in her sleep. At first I had found it sweet, she talked in her sleep. It wasn't until I understood that she was begging someone to stop that I realised she was having a nightmare and knew just what she was seeing. When she had started to struggle and nearly hit her head off the corner of the fire place, I had pinned her body down with mine; afraid she would hurt herself and vowed to take her up to bed as soon as she settled down.

She didn't settle down. As soon as I lowered my body over hers all hell broke loose and she struggled and bucked wildly whilst I tried to wake her up. It had broken my heart to see tears streaming down her face, her eyes glazed with fear. She didn't know it was me until Id finally got through to her. She had whispered my name sounding so broken; all I wanted to do was hold her in my arms. Then like an idiot I made the mistake of hissing when her hair caught it the claw marks she had just made. She had gone from snuggling into my arms like I was her only safe harbor in a storm to ripping herself away from me with horrified eyes and telling me to leave.

I wasn't going anywhere. I loved Bella and this was something we would both have to live with. She would always have nightmares, just like I had mine. I don't think I'd fully understood how haunted Bella truly was until tonight. Yes, I'd seen shadows in her eyes, sadness, but I'd never really understood how every night she relived her worst nightmare. She watched as the boy she trusted murdered her family and tried to kill her.

And he had tried to damn kill her. I hadn't mentioned it earlier because she seemed so lost in the moment, not realising the moment when I had discovered her scars. She had three, viscous scars on her abdomen and I remembered in the report that he had stabbed her three times before leaving her for dead as her family died around her. It had been a miracle that she survived, the amount of blood that she had lost. She was a miracle and I wasn't about to let her push me away because if a few scratches.

"Bella, honey, why don't you come out and put some clothes on, you must be freezing." I said gently as I held her flimsy white blouse in my hands, bringing them up to my nose to inhale her scent and wishing I could find a way to bottle it.

"Please just go," She whispered brokenly through the door.

I smiled. "Sorry, darlin', but I'm not going anywhere." I promised. It was true, I loved Bella and I was never going, even when she tried to push me away so she could build walls, I'd just found a way to tear them down.

I finally understood Jasper. I had always understood his reasoning and even respected him for it, but I'd never understood how he could wait so long for a woman who refused to be with him. Now I did. I knew Bella could come out of there and toss me out, but I'd wait until she was ready to let me back in. Until she gave into the fact that I loved her more than anything. Emmett would have a field day; he got to rip the piss out of the two of us.

Resting my head back against the door, I remembered a time a few weeks ago when I had made the same promise to myself, that I wouldn't give up. That someday, somehow, she would give in and realize she loved me. I started humming the song that played that night_, Give In To Me_, and remembered how she's said she loved the song and what it felt to have like to have her in my arms. What she didn't know was that I now had that CD, the movie, and it was her ringtone on my cell.

As I continued to hum the song, I noticed that her weeping calmed down until I heard her deep breathing behind the door.

"This was the moment I knew, Bella. I stood there with you in my arms and I saw something in your eyes and I knew you were the one. Since the moment I saw you, I had wanted you and I had wanted to win you over, but I hadn't let myself realize the extent of those feelings. Not until then, when you looked up at me such soft eyes and I could picture myself looking into your eyes for the rest of my life. I wanted to."

"Didn't you get punched within minutes? Maybe you should pay attention to that part of the evening," She replied, sounding more like my Bella.

"No," I drawled. "You love me; the punch was just fore play." I teased, knowing she would roll her eyes up to the ceiling like she was asking God why he put such an idiot on the planet.

"Edward," She began.

"No way in hell, baby. I'm not going anywhere."

From across the room, I saw the two devil cats and the one nice cat who actually liked me, look up with their creepy cat eyes. Though at first they'd taken in my naked body with a look of absolute disgust, now I could swear I saw respect in them.

Finally, after what seemed like so long, the door unlocked and started to open. I jumped to my feet when she opened the door, standing there in the dark bathroom, taking in the scratched on my chest and neck.

"I'm so sorry, Edward," She whispered, tearing up again.

Without hesitating, I pulled her into my arms and held her as she cried, just like I had needed to since I had woken up. "It's okay." I told her.

"No, it's not. I shouldn't be hurting you." She hiccupped.

I stroked my hand down her hair as I tried to soothe her. "Bella, I was a cop in Chicago for years. I've had a lot worse than this. These are just scratches, they'll heal. I don't care about scratches, what I care about is you shutting me out."

"I'm sorry."

I chuckled. "Stop saying you're sorry. I should have been smarter than to try and pin you down so you wouldn't hurt yourself. Obviously you've had these dreams before and know how to handle yourself, I just panicked. I didn't like seeing you in pain." I looked down at her. "You have to talk to me, Bella. You have to open up to me."

I felt her breathing stop and her heart pound. "You want to know what happened that night. Isn't it kind of a common story by now?"

I shook my head. "I don't want to know that version, I want yours. I wouldn't ask if I didn't think it would help. Let me in so I can help you."

She looked up into my eyes for the longest time, gathering her courage and making me fall in love with her all over again. "Can we start the fire first?" She asked with a small smile.

I grinned at her. "Why don't you go upstairs and grab some pillows and maybe even a blanket. I'll start the fire and make us some hot cocoa. How does that sound?"

Her answer was to rise to her tip toes and kiss my lips gently. "I'll get the first aid kit, too," She said as she turned and rush away.

I loved that woman.

* * *

After dousing my scratches in some sort of foul smelling disinfectant that stung like a bitch, we sat on our ready-made bed in front of the now blazing fire. We had finished our hot cocoa as Bella had tortured me, and then hissed at me to quit being a baby. Now we lay there, Bella wrapped up in my arms, her head resting on my chest as she traced her fingers gently through my chest hair. I hadn't thought the action could be sexy but it was.

"I really am sorry for these," She whispered as she lightly traced the scratch marks.

"I told you, it doesn't matter. We have to learn how to do certain things Bella, but we will. Like now I know not to try and calm you down when you're having a nightmare. See? We're improving already," I said with a chuckle, trying to be optimistic.

"You wouldn't have to if you have a normal girlfriend. One who won't claw you when you try to wake her up from a nightmare."

I groaned in annoyance. "How many times do I have to tell you? I don't want normal. I want you."

I felt her smile and kiss my chest, directly over my heart. "I may need to hear you say it a lot." She warned me.

I squeezed her to me. "I will say it every day. Twelve times a day if you'd like."

"Good."

I waited for a moment and then had to speak, had to make her talk even though I knew she didn't want to. I didn't want to upset her, I wanted to stay in this moment, but she needed to face it and she needed to let me in so I could help her. So I could understand.

"You're stalling," I pointed out.

I felt her sigh against my chest. "I don't know where to begin." She admitted.

"You begin like you do with everything else, at the beginning."

She lay there quietly as she organized her thoughts and readied herself to speak of something that brought her so much pain.

"I'm here, Bella."

"I was fifteen when I met him. I was the chubby one among my friends," She said with amusement. "Guys drooled over my best friend, but not at me. I was always the one who stood in the background. It didn't bother me, though, I loved my life. I had great friends, great family, I didn't have any worries. My father came from money, but he also worked hard for it, so we had everything we ever needed. He was the new boy in school... James." She forced the word out. "I was walking down the hallway when I saw him. Tall and muscular with sandy blond hair and blue eyes with this killer smile." She rolled her eyes. "It was what every girl in high school wanted, hell what most women want. He looked at me from across the hallway and I was lost. I thought he was handsome and sweet and he was interested in me."

"What changed then?" I asked quietly.

"We spent all our time together and he'd gotten kind of a reputation for being a bad boy, but I refused to see it. My mom would tell me 'Bella, you have good eggs and you have bad eggs'. I'd tell her that some eggs were just misunderstood." She laughed her voice full of love and affection when she spoke of her mother. "One day, they sat me down and said that they wouldn't try and come between us, but they wanted me to spend more time with my friends. It wasn't till then that I realised that they were right, that I had been neglecting my friends for him. It wasn't like we were just so happy to be spending time with each other because we were so in love, though. He always wanted to be alone, away from everyone else and not because he wanted to be alone with me, he just didn't want me around other people. When I told him I was going to start spending time with my friends he got so angry. He started yelling about how they would take me away from him; how they would tell me that I should break up with him."

"Did they?" I asked, not liking this James the more she went on. I knew Bella was a hopeless romantic and that she would have originally saw it as romantic until she realised he wasn't insisting they be alone because he loved her, but because he wanted to control her and most likely knew he couldn't if she were around he friends and family. I didn't say that to her, though, I knew from her voice that even talking about him was difficult; I didn't want to make it worse my saying that he had most likely been manipulating her for a long time.

When I thought about manipulation, I remembered the night she had found out about my lies and how she had used that word. Maybe she was already away of it.

"No, they just teased me about becoming one of those girls that we had always made fun of, the girls who forgot all about their friends when they got a boyfriend." She laughed. "James, though, he was always calling me, asking where I was and who I was with and what I was doing. It was just so much. I was fifteen and when I was around him everything was so intense, and not in a good way I realised, and then when I was with my friends everything was light and fun and I felt like a weight had been lifted off me. A weight I hadn't even known was there."

"I read that you'd broken up with him a week before you sixteenth birthday. Why?" I asked, wanting to know the details of what had actually happened.

"I had spent the entire summer trying to keep him happy so he wouldn't feel left out or be angry. My friends had even tried to include him, but he just didn't want to be around them. He didn't want to be around anyone. One day we were in school when this guy, Jacob Black, came up to me and started talking. He was funny and cute and asked me out. I had just told him about James when he came around the corner and just attacked him. He beat the hell out of the poor guy just because he'd asked me out for a movie. I remembering standing there and seeing the rage contort his face into this monster in front of me. Jacob tried to fight him off, but it was like he was possessed. He just kept hitting and hitting him. When I tried to pull him off him James hit me. I'd never been hit before. Not an experience I had exactly planned for at fifteen."

I felt my own anger rising at the thought of anyone laying a finger on Bella. The bastard had never loved her, he couldn't have. I had been raised that you didn't hit a girl, not even when she wound you up so much that you thought you'd explode, not even when she struck you first. I couldn't understand a man who would.

"That's when my brother... Andrew," She whispered and I flinched at the pain I heard in her voice when she only spoke his name. "That's when he came and got him off Jacob. He hadn't even noticed that he'd hit me. Andrew, he was as big as Emmett, and James didn't stand much chance against him. James was kicked out of school that day and when my family found out that he'd hurt me they were out for blood. They got a restraining order and forbid me to ever see him again. Id rolled my eyes, one of them swollen because of him, and told them that I had no intention of seeing him again. It was strange because, when I wasn't around him, I didn't miss him. I didn't wonder what he was doing and whether he was thinking of me. Before, Id brushed it off because I was just excited to see my friends, but it wasn't. I didn't love James. It took me a long time to realize that and I hated myself for making such a terrible mistake."

"We all make mistakes, sweetie. Besides you were only fifteen." I whispered as I kissed her hair. Part of me was glad that she knew she hadn't really loved him. The selfish, jealous part that wanted her loves only to myself. "What happened next?" I asked, knowing she needed to finally get this story off her chest. To get it out so she could begin to heal. She would never get over what had happened, but it would help.

"I got on with my life. I hung out with my friends, I played music again. I was going to be a singer, you know," she drawled. "I still think that Taylor Swift has my career. I was happy. I didn't have this big weight on my shoulders and I was free to be a sixteen year old girl. I even went out on a date with Jacob."

"You did?" I demanded. What guy would risk asking her twice?

"Yeah. He came up to me a couple weeks later and asked me to go out on a date. He teased that I couldn't turn him down since he was risking his life to do. I didn't love Jacob, but it was easy, light." She shrugged her shoulders.

"And then?" I spoke after she'd gone quiet.

"And then that night happened. The night that changed everything."

**A/N**** I know, shorter than usual, but if I told the rest of the story now, I'd never finish this chapter, lol! Please review and let me know what you thought.**


	11. Chapter 11

**A/N**** Hi guys! Thank you so much for your reviews! They were amazing and they all made me smile! Thank you to all of those who are reading this story, you are wonderful! IN this chapter we finally get to see what happened that night and what Bella did afterward.**

**BPOV**

He wanted to know about that night, I thought in a panic. I had never spoken about that night, not even to the therapists that insisted that I needed to talk about that night so I could move on. Move on? I had demanded. How could I move on when my family had been murdered? How did you move on from that?

The thing was though, was that speaking about this to Edward, wrapped up safely in his arms, I could talk about it. I could say that monsters name without feeling the grip of a panic attack surfacing. I could picture his face and I didn't run screaming, trying to escape my own memory. Edward helped me breathe, helped my heart continue a steady rhythm though it was breaking at the image of my brother.

It was knowing that Edward would be there either way, that gave me courage to continue. Just like he had waited outside of that bathroom door, completely naked and cold and waiting for me to come to him.

"I was asleep," I whispered. "The girls and I had gone out for the night and I was telling them about... losing my virginity," I finished awkwardly. "It was bad. He didn't know what he was doing, I didn't know what I was doing and he'd made this CD to play in the back ground. No one should have sex to the theme tune from _Dawson's Creek_. I've never been able to watch that show ever since. Don't laugh!" I snapped when I felt him chuckled beneath me.

I felt his lips brush my hair. "I'm sorry, baby."

"Yeah," I scoffed as I rolled my eyes. "My friend's had found it hilarious, too. I told them that I was never doing that ever again. I didn't get home till late and went to bed after stealing the last piece of pizza which Andrew complained about as I ran up the stairs. It was like any other night," I shrugged. "I was woken up by someone grabbing a fistful of my hair and dragging me out of bed. It was different then, I used to dye it blond," I mumbled for no reason. "Everyone tried to convince me to dye it back, especially Andrew."

"Were you and he close?" Edward asked quietly as he trace my skin with his fingers, his touch a lone giving me the strength to continue.

"We were. He reminds me a lot of Emmett and Jasper. I think that's why I didn't mind being around them so much tonight. He laughed a lot, like them. Teased the hell out of anyone, too. He was strong and tall with black hair and dark eyes. He was funny and sweet and a better person then I could ever hope to be. He and his girlfriend were applying to the same colleges because they didn't want to be separated." I smiled at the memory of him and Jennifer. It hurt to think of the fact that she was married with children now. "You remind me of him, too," I whispered. "How protective you are of me, he was like that. I remember in school, I must have been about eleven or twelve and this boy, Josh, was mean to me. I came home in tears, refusing to go back to school the next day. What I didn't know was that my grandma had told Andrew about it and he'd gone into my classroom at school and demanded to know who had been bullying his little sister."

"I like him," Edward chuckled.

"You would have. He told them that if no one came forward then he'd beat up every kid in that class just so he knew he'd gotten the right person. All the kids pointed at Josh," I laughed. "I actually become friends with Josh after that." I told him.

After a moment, I knew what was coming and felt my amusement die. Edward must have sensed it because his laughter settled down. "It's okay," He whispered.

"He told me we were going to play a game," I told him. "James. He dragged me down the stairs and into the living room, where my family were tied up, battered and bruised. My brother lay on the floor unconscious, his head was bleeding. He told me that I had to choose. I had to say which one of them died first."

"Fuck," I heard him hiss and strangely it made me feel better. Edward rarely swore in front of me. He said it was due to the fact that his mother had raised him a gentlemen and gentlemen didn't curse in front of ladies. It helped that at my lowest moment, he didn't have everything under control. That's what had made me so uncomfortable around the therapists they always insisted I talked to. They were all so emotionally detached and professional. If I was going to actually tell anyone the details of what happened that night, I didn't want professionally detachment.

"I couldn't, Edward. I couldn't stand there and tell him to kill one of my family. My mom was screaming for me to run, my dad telling James to stay away from me. I couldn't leave them even if he would have let me. He just laughed and said I might as well chose one now because we were all dead anyway." I said trying to blink back the tears. I could see them, my beautiful mother begging me to run, to save myself. My wonderful father, who had loved us all so much, had tried to be brave when I saw in his eyes that he knew we were going to die.

"What happened next?" Edward whispered and I could hear the tears in voice. It shocked me, that he was crying and I held him closer.

"I saw that Andrew was starting to come around from the corner of my eye and I thought that if I could keep him talking, I could give Andrew time to get up and get help. I asked him why he was doing this. Why he hated me so much? He just screamed that I had left him. That it was my fault that he was alone and that he loved me. With every word he seemed to get angrier and angrier and then he started shouting that it was parent's fault, that they were keeping us apart. That they had turned me against him. And then..." I broke off with a sob. "Then he got out a knife and he went behind my parents before I could even move and he slit..." I broke off again, unable to say the words.

"Its okay, Bella, you don't have to say it," Edward assured me, rocking me slightly as I sobbed.

"He just killed them, Edward. He killed them like they were nothing and like their lives meant nothing. My mom was such a wonderful person, she was always smiling and laughing and made you feel so loved and lucky to be around her. He killed her second because she was screaming, trying desperately to get to my dad as he died. I saw in his eyes, I saw the fear and the sadness and he looked my mom and he tried to smile, like to tell her everything would be okay and he died. He was an amazing man and to have him die like that... He was the one to teach me how to ride a bike and play guitar and hold me when I was afraid and he died."

I let the agony wash over me as Edward held me in his strong arms. I'd never really spoke of that night. Id given the police the basic outline on what happened, but I was in too much shock and then it was easier to not talk about it.

"We can stop if you want, Bella. You don't have to tell me anymore." He whispered.

I wanted to smile. He would say that. The thing was though, I wanted him to know. I trusted him to be there and catch if I ever fell because the pain was too much.

"After he killed my mom, it was like the world ended. Ten second ago they were alive and then, like lightening, he'd killed them. I could hear Andrew shout in the background, but James pulled me to him already and he stabbed me in the stomach three times in the stomach. The pain was like anything I'd ever felt. He whispered that if it was my fault. That I shouldn't have left him. He shoved me to the ground and stood about me, he raised the knife and I knew he wouldn't stop. It me he was angry at. It was me wanted to punish. Before he could, though, Andrew launched himself at James. I couldn't see them, but I could hear them and then I heard Andrew gasp in pain. That was when I knew we all die. James had got what he wanted. He was ranting and raving in the background and he started to beat my parent's bodies, blaming them. Andrew, bleeding and week, crawled over to me and lay next to me."

I couldn't see the living room when I opened my eyes, I saw my old house and I heard James in the background, hitting my parent's lifeless bodies. And then I saw Andrew.

_"It's okay Blue Bell," He whispered his nickname for me hoarsely as he dragged his body over to mine, draping himself protectively over me._

_"Are you okay?" I asked weakly, unable to move as my blood pooled around me._

_He glanced down at the blood that was coming from his chest and tried to smile. "Just a scratch." He wheezed out before he began coughing. "I__...__ love__...__ you... Blue Bell," he managed to force out._

_Even though I was weak from pain and blood loss and fading conscious, I started to panic. "I love you, too."_

_"Of__...__ course__...__ you do," He teased and then I couldn't hear his labored breathing anymore. His body no longer trembled in the pain he had tried to hide from me and his tear filled eyes looked lifelessly into mine._

_"Andrew?" I whispered. "Andrew."_

_"Well, wasn't that touching?" James drawled sarcastically._

_I glanced around at the bodies of my dead family and I wanted to die. I wanted it to be over. That's when we heard the sirens in the background, getting closer and closer to the house._

_"Fuck," James swore before glancing at my body. He smiled. "It's too late, anyway." _

_James disappeared from sight and I vaguely heard the back door slam shut. He'd escaped. _

_I lay on the floor and waited to die. When the paramedics came in, I wanted to scream at them for not arriving sooner. I wanted to scream when they lifted my brother's body away from mine. Taking him away from me._

_That's when one of them spotted me and that I that I was still breathing._

_"She's alive!" He shouted out in relief and joy and I hated him for it because if he had any mercy he would have just let me die on that floor. _

**EPOV**

I sat there and listened in horror as Bella told me what happened that night. Tears streamed down my face at what she went through. The pain I could hear especially when she spoke of her brother Andrew and how he had saved her life. Even though she hadn't wanted him to. How she had prayed for death.

I moved her so I could kiss her tears away, unable to think of anything else to do. I vowed then and there that I would always protect her. I would always love her and that she would never feel that way again. I knew I may not be able to succeed, but I would never stop trying.

"I hated that man, Edward. That man who was so happy that I was alive, who branded me a miracle, I hated him. Why couldn't he have just let me die?"

Because then I wouldn't have found you, I thought, but knew it wasn't wide to say the words. Bella was in pain and it was all because of that bastard who had wanted to hurt her.

"What happened after that?" I asked, trying to get her away from her thoughts of dying.

"I went to live with my aunt, you remember Sissy? Her mother. She didn't like me. The only reason she even took my in was because of my dad's money. With my family gone, it was all left to me and I couldn't touch it until I was twenty one." Her voice became steadier now, stronger. "I didn't speak or eat. I just wanted to be alone. I could hear talking about me like I wasn't even there. Saying that I was selfish because she was in pain, too. She had lost her sister and everyone was focused on me. I wanted to tell her that she could have the limelight. I didn't want it. I didn't want anything." She whispered.

"How long did you stay with her?" I asked, knowing that she had been committed for two years.

"Only about a month, I don't remember clearly. The only time I spoke was when I would scream my family's names in my nightmares. She came in one night and started yelling at me and trying to wake me up and I just launched at her. I didn't see her, I saw him. I attacked her and she started screaming that I was crazy, that I was dangerous. The next day I was taken away." She told me calmly, like her only surviving family hadn't thrown her away when she needed them.

"Bitch," I snarled, hating this woman. How could she do that to Bella? Even if she didn't want her, she was her sister's daughter. She was all she had left of her sister; wouldn't she want to keep her close?

"Don't, I was glad. I couldn't stand being there, having her tell story after story about my family. Anytime she had guests, out came the photo album and the horrific details of how she died. I couldn't stand it."

"Where does she live?" I growled making her laugh. I had meant it; I wanted to strangle this woman for what she did to a sixteen year old girl who had lost everything.

"I spent just over two years in there. I didn't care about anything or anyone and I just wanted to rot away in there." She admitted and my heart broke for her.

"What changed?" I asked quietly. I knew this woman and I knew that if she had wanted to stay in there, then she would still be in there.

She rested her elbows on my chest so she could see my face. Her eyes were red and puffy, her face blotched from her weeping, but she had never looked so beautiful.

"When I was eighteen I got transferred to go and stay with adult patients and I met this man," She smiled. "He was about sixty and he was in their because he told his children that he could see and talk to their mother. It scared them, they worried they had lost their father and put him in there to get help. I remember the day I met him, I was just staring out the window, watching the rain and he just sat down next to me with a deck of cards," She smiled. "He told me that I didn't have to talk if I didn't want to, but he needed someone to play cards with and his wife thought I could use a friend."

"He sounds like a good man," I said honestly.

"He is. I don't he think he is crazy, I just think he misses his wife and if it makes him happy to see her, then what's the harm in that? I was jealous, if anything. I wished I could see my family, even if it was only in my mind."

I frowned down at her. "Did he know she wasn't there?"

She nodded slightly. "He knew on some level. When I asked him about being in there, he just shrugged and said, I know they think I'm crazy and they could be right, but I loved my wife and it's worth being in here to be able to see her. That day when we met, I spoke for the first time. I had won the game he taught me how to play. He just smiled and cut the cards again. I would go and play cards with him every single day."

"So, when did you leave?"

"Mark, that was his name, he looked at me and asked how long I was going to punish for. How long I was going to stay in here before I moved on. I told him I didn't want to move on, that it would be like they never existed. He just smiled and said that they were always with me just like Amanda was, his wife, and they would never leave me. He laughed and said that he was sure they were pretty sick of being in an asylum after travelling from the heavens to watch over me. He told me that it was time to start living my life. He said to go along with what the doctors said and tell them what they wanted to hear." She shrugged. "I was out within a month. I was over eighteen and was a legal adult so I didn't have to stay with my aunt for long."

I frowned down at her. "Why would you go back to your aunts in the first place?"

She shrugged again. "No money. My inheritance wouldn't kick in until I was twenty one and my friend was away at college and I didn't want to bother her."

"Did she visit you when you were in there?" I asked, wanting to know whether her friend was worth the love and affection I saw light her eyes whenever she spoke of her.

Bella smiled. "Every week. She would come and talk to me like I answered her; she'd fill me on the gossip. She egged Jacobs car because he'd never once asked about me and was with another girl a week after it all happened. She never begged me to talk to her. She never asked for answers, she just sat with me and it helped."

I nodded. I didn't want to dislike someone who was obviously important to Bella, but if she had abandoned her like her aunt then I couldn't see a way but to not like her.

"What did you do then?" I asked her, running my fingers down her face, thanking god, or whoever, for not letting her die that night.

"I got a job waitressing and moved into this crappy apartment that had no heating and I'm pretty sure I could have knocked down a wall with a good punch. It was tiny and cold, but it was mine. I stayed there for about six months until I moved to a different city and started again. I'd get waitressing jobs and move around every few months. I never found a place I could call home. When I was twenty one, I got everything. The house, the money, the cars, my dad's law firm strangely enough. I sold everything, but not that. I couldn't sell what my dad had built from the ground up so I have people who run that for me. For him."

"What about your house? Did you ever go back?"

"Once. I went back and I lasted twenty seconds before I ran out of there and threw up in the drive way. I got some friends to go in and pack everything up. I gave most of it to charity or my friends if they liked it. I offered my aunt but I think she was more interested in the money than my mom's belongings. I kept a load of stuff. Pictures, jewelry that she wore, my brother's guitar and skateboard, my dad's reading glasses. I still have their wedding rings upstairs. I moved around so much that I kept it storage, but when I moved here I had it shipped over. It's all in the spare room."

Something in her words scared me. She moved every few months, would she leave?

"I'd go with you," I whispered without knowing.

She frowned at me but understanding lit her eyes and she leaned over to kiss me.

"Edward, I spent the past eight years wishing I had died that night and then I met you. You were like fresh air, like I could breathe again. Like the gaping hole that was left behind that night wasn't there. Not like it had healed, but like it never existed. I miss my family and I always will, but, now, when I look at you, I know why I'm here. Why I didn't die. Why I don't want to die anymore. I want to live and I want to be with you."

It felt like I could breathe again and I pulled her to me. "I love you, so much."

"I love you, too."

BPOV

I woke up to the early morning light and reached across our make shift bed on the living room floor, searching for Edward. He wasn't there.

"Edward?" I called out.

"In the kitchen, baby," He called back and I smiled.

It was good to hearing him messing around in the kitchen. It felt right. Last night had been hard, but it had also been good. I didn't have any secrets left. I was happy and I was with Edward. And I knew my family was happy for me.

I grabbed his shirt and went to meet him in the kitchen as I pulled it on.

He was standing by the stove, making scrambled eggs and glaring at the cats as they sniffed around him.

"I've already gave you yours," He snapped as they rubbed up against his jean clad legs. He was only wearing jeans and he was sight to be seen. The sun caressed his skin; highlighting his muscles and making him look sexier than ever. His jeans were only partially buttoned and I knew any woman would scratch my eyes out to be in place.

I walked up behind him and wrapped my arms around his waist, pressing a kiss to along his spine.

"Good morning, beautiful," He murmured as he turned to me.

"Good morning," I answered with a bright smile and a kiss, and then moved down his chest to kiss the scratches Id made as if I could somehow heal them.

"Hey," he muttered as he cupped my face in his hands. "Don't feel guilty. It was my fault, I should have understood."

"I shouldn't have clawed you like I'm one of the cats," I retorted, hating myself.

He just laughed. "Well, next time you have nightmare and I can't sit back and wait for you to come out of it by yourself, I'll put mittens on you," he teased as he kissed my neck.

"It's not funny, Edward," I told him breathlessly as he began to kiss my collar bone.

"No, it was an accident and we'll learn," He answered, pulling back to look into my eyes so I could see the sincerity there. He wasn't angry or upset. He was worried, but I knew it was more for me than him. "I promise, Bella, everything will work itself out."

I nodded, unable to do anything else.

"I was thinking," I began, "when you were asleep that maybe I should try to whole therapy thing again. I gave up before because they annoyed me and I didn't want to talk about, but after last night I think it's a good idea." I told him and held my breath as I waited for his response. I didn't want him to think that he hadn't helped. Last night was everything to me.

"Why the sudden turn around?" He asked quietly, no anger or annoyance, just curiosity.

I took a breath and told him the truth. "I want us to have a future, Edward. I want a future. I don't want to be afraid that I'm going to attack you in the middle of the night. I want to get better. I want to move on with my life. I love my family and I'll miss them until the day I see them again, but I want to focus on now and I want to be happy. With you."

His smile was slow and sexy. "I think that's a really good idea. You do know that either way I was staying, right?" He asked.

I nodded. "I know. That's why I made the decision. It always annoyed me that they were so detached because I needed someone to care. I have you for that. I have you for when I want to fall apart and be held and loved. I know with you there will never be detachment."

"Never," He promised.

**A/N**** So, Bella's getting help! Why, you ask? Well, in my opinion, though she has Edward there are still a lot of demons and I believe in therapy. Before Bella had been angry that they didn't care and she has Edward for that. He'll give her the emotional support she needs, but she wants to be healthy if that's the word so she and Edward can have more of a future together. Let me know what you thought!**


	12. Chapter 12

**A/N**** Hey guys! Here is the next chapter. I hope you like it! Please review!**

**BPOV**

The past few days had been amazing. Edward and I spent as much time together as possible going to movies, having lunch in the diner, another place where I was proudly becoming a regular and just enjoying being with each other. Edward stayed at mine at night, waking me in the morning with his gentle touch and soft kisses. Life was pretty damn good.

I'd even had Jasper and Emmett over to my house the other night when the game was on because they started to complain that Edward had been neglecting them. Most women wouldn't like their boyfriend's friends sitting in their living room eating pizza and drinking beer, but Id enjoyed it. I had felt like one of the guys, even though I was sitting on his lap with his arms wrapped around me and had no clue what or who they were shouting at.

Alice had taken the news of me hanging out with Jasper rather well, though she had refused to come over when he was there or join us.

Mrs. Tucker was still visiting her relatives so it was a little lonely in the library, but between work and visit from both Edward and Alice, things were running pretty smoothly. I had my first appointment next week and Edward was so supportive.

I was making dinner when I heard him walk through the door.

"Baby?" He called out from the front door. I could hear him taking off his jacket and hanging up his gun. I had never been a fan of guns, so he would put it away in the closet where I didn't have to see it.

"In the kitchen!" I shouted back as I wondered whether or not I could save the pizza I had burned to a crisp. Probably not, I thought as I dumped it in the trash. "We may have to order in. Only problem is that they always get lost and by the time it's delivered not even those red bag things that they have can keep them warm." I muttered to myself.

I smiled as his arms wrapped around me and he rested his chin on my shoulder. "What did you destroy?" He asked with a chuckle.

I turned and pressed a kiss to his jaw. "Pizza. It was a blood bath."

"Poor baby." He chuckled as he turned me around and lifted me up to sit me on the counter top, wedging himself between my legs. "How was your day?" He murmured as he kissed my neck.

"It was good," I answered breathlessly. "I missed you, though."

He smiled. "I missed you."

We spent the next few minutes getting lost in kisses and whispers until the Sookie fell off the kitchen counter and ruined the mood.

"So, I have a question." He began as he pulled back slightly, his body still tight against mine in all the right places.

"What's your question?" I asked suspiciously. There was something in his eyes, something that told me I may not like it.

"Well, my mom and dad would like it if we came for dinner tomorrow. I have the day off and the libraries closed on Sunday's so she thought..."

I blinked. "Your mom wants to meet me?" I asked numbly. I had never met his mother, never seen her in town and I was nervous. It was one thing to meet his friends, but this was his mom.

Something flickered in his eyes, something I couldn't quite put my finger on, but it was significant. "She does."

I bit my bottom lip. Obviously his mother wanted to meet me and I didn't want to be rude, I could also tell that Edward wanted me to go, but I was nervous.

"What if she doesn't like me?" I worried.

The look was back in his eyes as he cradled my face in his hands. "She will love you."

I took a deep breath and smiled. "Okay."

* * *

"Are you ready for this?" Edward asked as he pulled up outside of the beautiful house. It was a white two story house that looked a lot like mine only larger and instead of forest surrounding the back of the house, it was the river.

"No." I answered bluntly.

I had been worrying all night. It had taken me twenty minutes to decide what to wear, eventually deciding on a white summer dress and ballet shoes. Edward had laughed at me and had tried more than once to get me out of my clothes when I was showing him my ideas. He didn't seem to understand the big deal about what I wore. I had rolled my eyes and told him that he was a moron before stomping into the closet to search frantically for something that looked classy and sophisticated without making me look like a tramp.

"You'll be fine," He chuckled. "She's excited to see you."

Edward walked around the car to open my door, something he was trying to get me used to. He liked to treat me as what he called a 'lady' and that included opening doors and pulling out seats. It was a little strange to me, I'd never been around a man who acted like that before, but it was enjoyable.

When Edward held his hand out to me, I placed mine in his and climbed out of the car and making our way up to his parents' house, hand in hand.

"Mom, we're here!" He called out as we entered the house.

His parents' home was lovely and homely. Pictures were everywhere, showing Edwards childhood years with his parents and with his. The colors were light and welcoming with a lot of windows to let the sunlight into the house. It was a home, one anyone would be comfortable in.

Two extremely attractive people came walking around the corner with bright welcoming smiles on their faces. The man was tall, blond, with blue eyes and was extremely handsome. The woman, well, she reminded me a little of my mom. Her green eyes, a shade lighter than Edwards were soft and warm and her smile was kind. She had a heart shaped face and wavy caramel hair. Like her husband, she was stunningly beautiful. It was easy to see why Edward was so handsome when looking at his parents.

"Bella, these are my parents, Carlisle and Esme Cullen." Edward introduced me.

Instead of taking Esme's outstretched hand, I stood there frowning at her face. She was so familiar now that I looked at her closely. I wracked my brain trying to think of where I had seen her before. I knew I hadn't seen her in town before, so where was it?

"How do I know you?" I mumbled without thinking.

Instead of being offended by my abrupt question, Esme smiled and gently pulled me into her arms. "You are so like your mother, but you have your father's eyes." She said softly.

I jolted back to gawk at her. "How?" I mumbled, unable to get out a full sentence. How had she known? What was happening?

Her smile was gentle and patient. "Renee was my best friend. We grew up together and kept in contact over the years. I know all about you Bella."

I gasped. If the woman had sucker punched me, I would have been less shocked.

"I don't understand," I muttered, looking up at Edward for guidance.

He looked down at me uncomfortably. "I wanted to tell you," he whispered.

I took a step back from him, hating the way he flinched at the movement. "Why didn't you tell me?" I demanded, not angry, just confused and overwhelmed.

He smiled softly. "You weren't ready for that. I wanted to tell you the other night, I just didn't know how."

Esme intervened. "Please don't be angry with Edward, Bella, it was my fault. I agreed that maybe it was a little too soon for you to know. I'm sorry for that, it wasn't my place."

Sensing that his wife was becoming distressed, Carlisle came and wrapped a supporting arm around her waist. He looked at me with a kind smile. "Hello Bella. It's nice to finally meet you. We've heard a lot about you over the years, but unfortunately it was never a good time to travel. We should have made time." He added, his eyes darkening with grief.

I stood there for a moment with my eyes squeezed shut, trying not to be angry. I remembered them now. My mom's best friend from Virginia, who she saw as a sister. When my mom had left the small town she'd grown up and met my dad, Esme had stayed behind and married her first love. Over the years Esme and my mom had wrote constantly to the other, telling them about their lives and what was happening. They were always calling the other; their conversations were long and full of laughter.

How had I not remembered her? I had moved to this town because I wanted to be closer to my mother and had moved into the house that her grandparents had left her. The small house in the woods that she had grown up in with her mother, father and sister. How had I not remembered Esme and the Cullen's?

I looked up into her eyes and remembered the day of the funeral. I didn't have clear memories of that day, but I remember the kind looking woman weeping into her husband's chest as my family was lowered into the ground. It had hurt to see her pain when I had thought nothing could reach me. I knew then why I had blocked her out of my memory.

"You were there that day," I whispered. "The funeral."

She nodded, tears filling her eyes. "I was. I have something's for you." She told me as she walked over and picked up a box from the table. "It's her letters. I thought maybe you'd like to read them."

I looked at the box for the longest moment before taking it from her hands. My own were trembling almost uncontrollably.

I looked down at the box that had my mother's words in it, her thoughts and feelings and I couldn't breathe.

"Edward," I whispered, knowing he would be there.

"What can I do?" He asked, pulling me into his arms.

"I need to be alone," I whispered. "I can't breathe."

Without saying a word to me or his parents, Edward pulled me through the house and into their backyard. At the bottom of the garden, there was a path that led to the dock and a big tree that had a tire swing.

"I always found it peaceful here," He told me ad he encouraged me to sit on the tire swing. "You have the trees and the water and when the sun hits just right it's beautiful. You sit here for as long as you like, okay? I'll be inside." He pressed a kiss to my forehead and then made his way back into the house.

I smiled at him as he walked away. It's no wonder I love that man.

* * *

I sat on the swing, imagining a young Edward swinging higher and higher, trying to reach the sky.

I thought about how different my life would have been if my family had moved back here. I knew our parents had spoken about it once, but then my father's law firm had taken off and became one of the most sought after firms in Washington and we had stayed.

My family would still be alive. I would never have met James and I would still have my family. Edward and I would have been raised together. How would that have changed our relationship? Would he have seen me as just a family friend or would we have found our way to this place? I smiled as I remembered how he looked at me with a mixture of love and desire in his eyes and I knew that we were always destined to find each other.

After twenty minutes I gathered the courage to read my mother's letters. They began from the time that she had left Sugar Grove and met my dad, to the news of their engagement, asking Esme to be her maid of honor, when she was pregnant with Andrew and then me, even sharing her worries about my relationship with James and asking for Esme's advice. Every moment of her life, our lives even, had been discussed in these letters.

She in turn had constantly been asking questions about Esme's life. Her happiness that Carlisle had finally proposed and was going to practice in Sugar Grove, her excited response to Esme, stating that of course she would be made of honor. Her happiness at the news of Esme's pregnancy with Edward and his birth. Her worry and sympathy when Esme had gotten sick. Everything was there. The last letter was written a week before she had died.

With trembling hands, I opened envelope to a battered letter that had obviously been read a lot over the last eight years. It took me a while to read the letter. I was scared for some reason. Needing a moment, I brushed away my tears with the back of my hand and looked up. The sun was setting over the river, the fading sunlight lighting the lake beautifully. Edward was right, it was beautiful.

It was the thought of losing the light that had me reading my mother's letter.

_Esme,_

_I hope all is well with you, Carlisle and Edward. I finally understand what you meant when you said that when Edward left for college that you were so proud and happy, but it broke your heart. Andrew left for college and I don't know what to do. I've had him so close for eighteen years and now he's away, by himself, doing god knows what! Bella just laughs at me and tells me that he called her and everything is fine. Can you believe it? Whenever I call him he's too busy to talk, but he call's Bella! I guess I should be glad that they're so close... Bella is doing a lot better; she's dating that Jacob Black boy! I'm not his biggest fan since I'm pretty sure they've had sex and she is too young, not that I can judge... At least he's not James, though. My girl had better sense than to do anything with that weirdo. It is so good to have him out of her life, Esme. To know that he is finally out of her life!_

_Anyway, enough about me how are you and Carlisle? Tell me everything! And Edward, how is he doing in college? Can you find out if he knows anyone who goes to Andrews's school and can spy on him for me? I know, I sound like a crazy mom that we used to vow that we'd never become, but who cares? Andrew is coming home for the weekend next week so I can pump him for information and go through his bags for clues then. Wish me luck!_

_Give my love to Carlisle and Edward!_

_Love you, _

_Renee_

I looked up at the night sky with tear drenched eyes. Mourning the loss of my family all over again.

"I miss you, mom. I miss you so much." I whispered, my voice shaking with grief.

A warm breeze blew around me fanning my face and making the letter in my hand flutter.

Some would have caused it a coincidence, but for one moment, I could feel them surrounding me and for the first time, I felt the weight of grief lift and my heart began to heal.

**EPOV**

"Edward Anthony Cullen, you get away from that window and give her some privacy," my mom snapped as she poured hot cocoa into a cup.

I let the curtain slip from my fingers for a second, before turning back round and lifting it again so I could make sure Bella was okay.

"I'm going to go check on her," I told them as I stormed over to the back door, ready to wrench it open and go to her.

"Leave her be," My dad said as he read his book at the kitchen table.

Where I would have ignored my mother, I always took my father. He rarely intervened with anything so whenever he did, I knew to listen to him.

That didn't mean I had to give in gracefully though, I thought as I stormed back over to the kitchen window to spy on the woman I loved.

My mom sat down and tried, once again, to figure out her word jumble at the kitchen table. It was such a familiar sight to me. I didn't know why she bothered; she'd always give in with a huff and declare that they were fixed. Little did she know that my dad often got it out of the trash and finished it when she wasn't around. She'd kill him if she knew.

"She's been out there for hours," I muttered.

"Well, there's a lot of letters," She replied as she angrily scrubbed her eraser across the page, glaring when my father laughed at her.

"It's getting cold." I worried.

"Honey, I swear to god, if you don't sit down in ten seconds I'm going to get the spoon and brain you with it," She threatened without looking up at me.

The spoon was an ancient wooden spoon that she cooked with, that she had often used when I was a teenager to bat me and my friends out of the kitchen when we'd get too rowdy. She had never used it to hurt us, but had joked that why should she hurt her hand on our hard heads?

"You don't scare me," I muttered as I took my seat.

"I heard that," She snapped.

Of course you did, I thought sarcastically.

After twenty seconds, I couldn't take it and got up to peer at her through the kitchen window. Then I went and sat down again, drumming my fingers against the table impatiently.

My mother's hand clamped over of mine like lightning to stop the annoying drumming sounds.

"Honey, give her time. You've never lost a parent and she's lost both of hers and her brother. Can you imagine what it must be like to read her mother's words? How much it must hurt to read her stories and to know exactly how much her mother loved her. Give her time," She repeated gently.

I looked up at my parents. I could never imagine losing them. Even when I was a teenager and going through my 'rebellious' phase, I had known how much I was loved and how much I loved them in return.

I thought about how different our lives were. She'd been through hell, while I'd had a normal, happy life.

I remembered when I had been eighteen and focused on college after Shelby had broken my teenage heart. Even five years ago, I was doing the job I loved in the place I wanted to work. I'd read about the sixteen year old Isabella Swan who had survived the attack on her family. How she had watched her family be brutally murdered. I had been twenty three and doing the job I loved. I'd gotten everything that I had ever wanted.

It was then that I allowed myself a moment of self-doubt. She had been through hell. She'd been through so much pain, how could I ever truly help her? She needed someone who could take care of her and be there when everything got too much. I wasn't perfect. What if I messed up? What if I failed her?

My mother mistook the fear in my eyes at my own failures as fear for Bella.

"Go on. Tell her my infamous rice pudding will be done any minute now." She laughed.

I kissed her forehead before bombing out of the back door, hearing my parent's laughter in the back ground.

* * *

I found her on the tire swing, rocking back and forth slowly, her face expression so far away, I wondered where she was.

I walked over and pulled the swing to a stop, dropping to kneel on the grass in front of her.

"Hey, baby, you've been out here for a long time," I said gently.

She jolted as if Id shouted; she'd been so far away.

"I'm sorry. Your parents must think I'm so rude. I come here, demand to know who they are and then stay out here for the next couple of hours. What a great first impression," She groaned.

I rubbed my hands up and down her thighs, trying to reassure her, but also trying to warm her up. She was only wearing a thing white dress. She was freezing.

"Don't worry about it. It was my mom who told me to leave you alone," I smiled and reached for her hands, trying to warm them up.

"Her favorite song was American Pie by Don McLean," She murmured as she looked down at our entwined hands. "She used to sing it all the time. It drove my dad crazy. We would all roll our eyes, but it was the first song I ever learned. I knew the chorus to the song better than I knew any nursery rhyme. I didn't even know what a Chevy was," She laughed.

"My mom loves that song," I admitted, realising why.

"They used to play it on the drive to school," She told me. "My mom did the same thing with us. You want to know one of my favorite things to do as a kid?" She asked suddenly.

"What was it?"

"When my mom would hang the laundry out on the washing line to dry out in the sun. Then it would rain and we'd all race outside to get them back in," She chuckled. "The entire time, she'd be yelling for us to hurry up, but she'd be laughing. We all would. I have read all of her letters. How happy she was and how much she loved us. And how she knew that we loved her. That is so important, that she knew. She speaks of so much, Edward. Of all the big things that happened, that I can't help but hate the fact that she will miss so much."

"You want to know what I'm afraid of." I whispered.

"You? Afraid?" She teased me.

"I'm afraid that I'm going to fail you." I admitted lowly.

"Edward," She replied in shock.

I continued on like she hadn't spoken. "I'm afraid that I will fail you. That I'm not enough. That I'm not what you need to be happy. That I can't make you happy."

I felt all my fears and insecurities pouring out of me and I couldn't stop them. What if I couldn't save Bella? What if I failed her?

"You need someone strong, Bella. I'm afraid I may not be that person." I told her.

I hadn't known to a full extent how much I feared letting her down. Letting another person down, but it was strong and overwhelming and terrifying.

"Edward, why did you come home?" She asked quietly.

"Why do you want to know?" I asked after a slight hesitation.

She cradled my face in her hands, her eyes soft and full of love.

"Because I'm not the only one who has nightmares."

**A/N**** There you go my pretties! Next update should be tomorrow! Let me know what you think!**


	13. Chapter 13

**A/N**** Hi guys! Thank you all so much for reading and your reviews! Here is the next chapter that goes from really good and sweet and sad to sucky! Please review!**

**EPOV**

"You've never mentioned anything before," I muttered uncomfortably. What had I said? How much did she know?

Bella ran his fingers gently through my hair with a soft smile.

"When you spend two years in a psych ward, you kind of find out pretty quickly that people tend to be sensitive about their demons. And their privacy. I was going to wait for you to tell me in your own time, but then you started saying all these silly things about not being strong enough and I thought maybe it's time _you _should talk."

I sighed and rested my forehand against her legs for a moment before looking up into her soft, loving eyes.

"I didn't want to put all of my stuff on you. Especially when compared to you-" I began.

"Hey!" She interrupted sharply. "Your demons mean just as much as mine. Your nightmares are as just as important as mine."

I looked into her eyes and saw the absolute sincerity there. My problems were a big deal to her. My past was just as important to her.

Knowing that, knowing that she trusted me with her demons, gave me the strength to tell her mine.

"It was about six months ago. A couple of teenagers held held this store up at gunpoint. We were called and raced over there. Turns out these two kids were involved in some sort of gang and needed the money to pay off some debt he owed. They were just kids," I whispered, remembering their faces, how young they were. "When the owner saw us, he thought he was safe and tried for the gun." I slammed my eyes shut against the piercing sound of the gun going off. I forced out the next words, my eyes burning with tears. "A young mother and her daughter had been hurt. The mother died instantly, but the girl..." I trailed off, my voice breaking.

"Edward," She whispered her voice full of compassion for them, for me.

"Her name was Tammie and she was four years old. Her mom had taken there after school to get dinner." I tried to hold back the sob as memories flashed in my mind. "I held her in my arms as my partner arrested the teenagers. I had blood all over me," I cringed, remembering how it had covered me. Her blood. "I stayed with her in the ambulance, I couldn't leave her. She didn't even make it to the hospital," I whispered, seeing her tiny body, lifeless. I scrubbed the tears away from my eyes.

Bella brushed away my tears with her fingers as I tried to regain some sort of composure.

"They said that it was just wrong place at the wrong time. Like that explained how two innocent people could die so horrifically just because they went into the store on the way home to pick up dinner. How is that the wrong place or wrong time? She was four years old! Children should be able to go to the store with their mother. They shouldn't know about guns or knives or violence. Death and violence shouldn't be something they even understand."

**BPOV**

My heart broke as I heard what Edward had gone through? What he had shielded me from because he thought his pain was lesser in some way. Ridiculous! His pain was important. HIs past was important.

The first time I'd known that there was more to Edward returning to Sugar Grove than he let on was during the two weeks when we were getting to know each other and I had tried to place him in what he called my 'friend' box.

We had been watching _Dharma and Gregg_, another part of Edward's education to amazing television shows and he had fallen asleep. I had been about to wake him up and yell at him for his lack of respect and taste by falling asleep when he had started to mumble something in his sleep. He had been telling someone to stop, that she was just a child. His voice and been so full of pain and guilt, it had broken my heart.

When he had woken up, I had pretended like I hadn't noticed anything and pretended to be disgusted with him, when really I had wanted to tell him that no matter what had happened, it hadn't been his fault. That he was a good man.

During the past couple of nights when Edward had slept next to me, wrapped up in his arms, my nightmares hadn't been so bad. They had been bearable. That's when I'd been able to notice that Edward suffered from his nightmares too. That he had been trying to hide them from me.

"So you came back home?" I asked as I ran my fingers through his thick hair as he rested his forehead on my legs.

"I couldn't stay there," he whispered brokenly. "I'd failed."

"What?" I demanded sharply as I pulled his head up so I could look into his sad green eyes.

"Bella, all I'd ever wanted was to be a police officer. To help people and put away the bad guys. I failed. I failed that mother and that sweet little girl. They were killed because I failed to do my job."

"Listen to me," I ordered. "They died because a stupid kid decided to take a gun into a store instead of finding another way. They died because that owner decided to play hero when he should have left it to you and your partner. You did not fail."

He continued as if hadn't heard a word I'd said. "I remember when her dad came into the hospital. He'd just heard and he'd come running in. His eyes were so full of pain and they, they just shut down, like his heart couldn't handle that amount of agony. So his brain had just closed it off so he could cope."

Tears streamed down my face at the image of the young father, desperately hoping that his family was okay and then not being able to cope when he realised that he lost them. I also cried for Edward and his pain, at his guilt that he shouldn't have felt.

"I kept thinking of him for weeks. How could he ever get over this? Not only had he lost his wife, but he'd lost his child. I couldn't cope, Bella. I couldn't handle it and I couldn't do my job. I was trained for this and yet I couldn't distance myself away from it." He admitted like it was some great shame.

I smiled slightly. "I don't think that's a bad thing, honey. What happened to the boys who were arrested?" I asked quietly.

His features hardened in fury. "They didn't care. There was no remorse, no shame. They just shrugged it off. There were more concerned about saving themselves. I don't understand how they can live with themselves."

I smiled and kissed his forehead. "You're not supposed to understand, honey. You're not supposed to and that's a good thing. Am I supposed to understand why me ex-boyfriend came in and murdered my family, tried to murder me because I broke up with him. And you know what he did, Edward? After he killed my family and thought he'd killed me, he drove himself off a cliff. Like some bad movie. He took the coward's way out. His body perished in the flames so I couldn't even kick the living hell out of that. And I wanted to, Edward. At night, when my nightmares would come, I wanted to make him pay for what he did to my family. And for why did he do it? Because his fifteen year old girlfriend broke up with him. How am I supposed to understand or even let go of that?"

"You don't," he whispered. "Just like I won't. What a pair we are," He muttered.

"You helped me, Edward. Let me help you. You are not to blame. You did your job but other people and their actions got in the way. I'm glad that you couldn't get over that little girl's death because then you wouldn't be the man I love. The man that I will always love. It was not your fault, Edward," I told him firmly, meaning every word.

Slowly, I saw him begin to understand, but I knew that, like me, Edward may need more help than I could give. He was right. What a pair we were.

"Thank you," he whispered. "For helping me. For loving me."

I brought his lips up to mine.

"That is something that will never change."

* * *

That night Edward and I had walked back into his parents' house, hand in hand. I could tell that Esme and Carlisle knew something had happened when they saw their son's puffy eyes, but they hadn't asked. I liked that about them.

I had apologized sincerely for being so rude, I'd just gotten lost in my mother's letters. Esme and Carlisle had brushed away my apologies and insisted I sat down for some desert before it got cold. They had wanted to know what I'd been up to for the past eight years. Id given the cliff notes version, not wanting to bring down the mood. Esme had been horrified when she's heard about my time in the psychiatric facility and had begun to pace, plotting to track down my aunt and beat her to a bloody pulp. It warmed me, to know that she hadn't known about my past and that if she had, she would have done something, anything to help me.

Carlisle had listened quietly as I spoke and was glad when he heard that I was actually starting therapy sessions soon. The only time he frowned was when I told him the name of my therapist. He'd shook his head and said that he didn't think we'd match, since that was an important part of therapy and gave me the name of a therapist he thought would be able to help me.

I liked his parents and I could tell that meant the world to Edward.

Later that night, Edward and I had gone home and watched television in bed before falling to sleep, both of us exhausted after our emotional roller coasters. It was the first night in a long time that I didn't have a nightmare, but a dream. A good dream about my family and Edwards's family, all of them meeting once again. It was a really good dream. Edward hadn't so much as stirred as he held me in his arms. I saw that as a good sign that whilst we may not be healed yet, we were beginning to get there.

It was a week later when I was in the library alone and Ben, the delivery man came in the library. Normally, I would try and get him out of there as quickly as possible. I had never felt comfortable around anyone, even the nice man who delivered new books to our library. That made me feel ashamed, especially since he had always been so incredibly nice and friendly to me, even when I had been anything but to him.

So when he arrived today, I decided to try with him.

"Good morning, Isabella," He greeted cheerfully as he brought the paperwork over for me to check and sign.

Taking a deep breath and pulling a leash back on every instinct that told me to shut down; I smiled brightly up at the kind man. "Hi Ben. How are you?" I asked and had to hold back laughter at his shocked expression.

"I- I- I'm good. Thank you," He stammered.

"That's good!" I smiled. "I heard that you and your girlfriend had gotten engaged. Congratulations!" Alice had informed me of that when I told her my plans to be more social.

Alice had hugged me and said how proud she was of me before giving me the scoop on pretty much anyone I would run into. She was impressive with the information on other people's lives that she had her fingertips. She had shrugged away my awe, saying that it's what happened when you grew up in a small town.

"We are. Thank you." He smiled, becoming more at ease with my new, chatty self. It was exhausting, I had to admit. I was out of practice with talking to new people. It all came so effortlessly with Edward and Alice.

"Is it right that you and Edward Cullen are an item?"

I glanced around uncomfortably. "Who told you?"

He grinned. "It's pretty common knowledge that you decked the sheriff in the bar before going back a few days later on a date. I have to admit that if that's the way he gets girls, I'd rather be single."

I laughed at his joke. "Yes, but then you don't need to be looking to get girls to date you, do you?"

He threw his head back and laughed. "No. And please don't tell my Angela that or she'll geld me."

I giggled. He was funny and obviously in love with Angela. I couldn't picture her face, but I got the feeling that I had most likely seen her in town.

"We can keep it between the two of us," I promised with a wink.

I felt so good. Here I was, talking to a guy and laughing and joking and doing well. I hadn't felt panic during our short conversation once. I was pretty damn proud of myself.

That's when it happened.

"Keep what between the two of you?" Edward asked, making his presence known.

I went to greet him, when I saw something in his eyes. It was something I'd never seen in him before; anger, jealously. And what hurt was the suspicion that I saw there. The mistrust.

Ben seemed to sense it too, because he quickly mumbled a response before diverting the conversation back to business.

"I just need you to sign right there." He said as he pointed out to where I had to sign.

I quickly scribbled my signature next to where the little yellow tabs were and watched as Ben made his quick exit. I frowned angrily. I was doing so well and Edward had destroyed everything. Not wanting to lose my temper just yet, I turned to him.

"What was that about?" I demanded.

He looked at me and there was something in his eyes. Something he wasn't letting me see. It was hard to see that he was hiding something from me still. He had let me in about his darkest nightmares, so what else could he be hiding? Why would he hide something?

"What was what about?" He replied and I wanted to roll my eyes at his childish response.

I just looked at him, expecting him to return to the kind, sweet guy that I loved. When he just continued to stare back, I gave in. "I'm talking about you. You basically just ran him out of here."

"Don't be dramatic, Bella." He retorted.

"Then don't you be ridiculous!" I snapped. "Don't you think I can't see what you're really thinking? I know a jealous boyfriend when I see one, Edward."

"Don't do that," he snapped. "Don't compare me to him."

I blinked. I hadn't compared him to anyone. "I wasn't saying you were like James. I'm just saying that I know jealousy when I see it. What is going on with you? You know I'd never cheat on you, or even think about it."

I saw a flash of the man I loved for a second before his eyes cooled, his mask coming back down. "Nothing is wrong with me. I just don't like to walk in and see my girlfriend flirting with another man."

"Flirting?!" I demanded. "I was talking to the man. I told you I was trying to talk to people. You said it was a good idea."

When he refused to acknowledge the truth, I decided to hell with privacy, especially when whatever was happening was turning him into someone that I didn't know.

"I think this has less to do with me flirting with an engaged man and more to do with you hiding something from me. I thought we were passed that, Edward. Please tell me what it is, I can see that something's wrong."

He scowled at me, refusing to tell me what was so obviously wrong with him.

"You don't see anything." He replied, but I could see it in his eyes. Something was wrong and it hurt him. It hurt me that he refused to tell me when I thought we trusted each other more than that. I trusted him that way.

"Edward, come on, tell me. We don't do this. We don't have little squabbles over something that isn't important, so it must be. Just tell me." I pleaded. If I knew, I could make it better. Id apologize for obviously hurting him, even unknowingly. But I couldn't, wouldn't, do that until he told me the truth.

"Let it go, Bella." He replied.

I felt hurt stab me. Maybe I was over reacting, I didn't know, but it hurt that he had closed off from me. It hurt that he didn't trust me with Ben. I understood jealously, I wouldn't like it if I saw him with another girl, but shutting me out hurt.

Where was the man that had kneeled in front of me just days ago and shared his most painful memories with me? I missed him.

Edward glanced at his watch. "I have to get going. Do you want me to come around later?" He asked.

A part of me was glad because that meant whatever was riding him didn't mean he didn't want to continue our usual routine. The other part of me, the part that was hurt and angry didn't want him to act like everything was normal because it wasn't.

That was the part of me that won and replied.

"No."

"Fine," He snapped and turned to leave.

"Fine." I replied wondering what the hell had happened to change things so quickly.

**A/N**** Yay, Edward and Bella have their first fight! What over, you ask? Well, you'll find out in the next chapter! Edward has one more secret to share... Let me know whose side you were on in this argument! I love teams!**


	14. Chapter 14

**A/N HI guys! Thank you all so much for your reviews! They all made me laugh, especially when a certain someone had a little too much coffee and linked me to bringing down the medical industry! One I didn't like was a guest reader pointing out there's no The in Gilmore Girls. Nothing else, no thoughts on the actual story, just that... It makes me kind of blue. Also, there's no The in The Gap, but I say it that way and I refuse to conform! Even though I didn't get the job... Anywho, thank you all again, you rule! IN this chapter we get to find out why the hell Edward reacted that way and one of you get what you wanted to happen the last time they had a tiff. The cats won't be peeing on him, though...**

**BPOV**

I sighed as I checked my phone for the third time. No messages and no missed calls. No calls at all for that matter. Obviously Edward didn't feel as crappy about what had happened earlier like I did. Obviously he was fine. Asshole.

I didn't understand what had changed and the more and more I worried about what had happened, the angrier I became. So what if he walked in and saw me laughing with someone, male or female? He should be happy that I am finally talking to someone! He had urged me to try it, that I would be fine and what does he do when I actually speak to someone who happens to be male? He has a bitch fit and ignores me for the rest of the afternoon.

I groaned as I stormed over to the reference section. I didn't do unnecessary drama. I had known that Edward and I would have fights, like every other couple on the planet, but I also thought he'd stick around until it was sorted out. What, was he just going to storm out every time we fought? How could I have a relationship with a man who I was putting so much faith in when he none in me or our relationship?

I understood that Edward and I were new in this relationship and that we would have rocky patches. I may not have had many relationships, but I read romance novels and watched romance novels. I knew we would have problems, but it still hurt me. I didn't like being at odds with him. I hated it.

When my cell phone rang I almost dropped the stupid thing in my rush to answer it.

"Hello?" I said breathlessly.

"Hi honey!" Mrs. Tucker greeted from the other end of the phone.

"Hi!" I all but squealed down the phone. I had hoped that it had been Edward and was disappointed that it wasn't, but I was happy to hear from her. I missed her.

"Well you sound happy. Does it have anything to do with a certain sheriff?" She teased.

"Doubtful, since he stormed out of here a couple of hours ago after I told him not to bother meeting me after I closed up tonight and I haven't heard a word since." I quipped as I balanced my cell between my ear and shoulder as I re-alphabetized the books. Says everything, people barely come in but when they do they mess things up.

There was a long pause before she finally spoke. "What happened?"

"Oh, well, he came in while I happen to be talking to another man and looked at me liked I'd just given him a lap dance and was about to shove a twenty down my glittered bra."

Mrs. Tucker chuckled deeply. "I don't know what's going on between the two of you kids, but sort it out. That boy is crazy about you and I know you're crazy about him."

I sighed. "Yeah. I want to fix things, but I also want to brain him with a dictionary."

She laughed again. It was good to hear her laugh. "Well, I just called to say that I want be home for a couple more weeks."

"What? Why?" I demanded, hating the idea of not seeing her for even longer. She had been my first friend in town, the only person I spoke to. She had given me a job, not because she needed the help so much as she knew I needed to get out of the house.

"Oh, well, I took a stumble down the stairs and..."

"You what?! Are you okay?" I demanded. Forgetting about the books, I whirled around to pace back and forth as she filled me in about her 'stumble'.

It turns out that her relatives had a large staircase and while going to get a drink in the night, her foot had caught on her night gown and she'd gone flying down the stairs. She'd broken her arm, sprained her opposite wrist, twisted her ankle and was bruised from head to toe.

"Why didn't you call me straight away, I would have come to you."

"I know you would have," She agreed and I could hear smile in her voice. "That's exactly why I didn't tell you until now. I didn't want you to have to come and babysit me. Sounds like I should have, though. It would have saved Edward from getting himself in trouble," She chuckled.

"Yeah, you would have." I replied. "I can come out there now," I began.

"No." She replied firmly. "You go and see to that man of yours. Make him grovel but forgive him in the end. He is only a man after all. I'll be home as soon as I'm well enough to travel. Talk to you soon."

"Okay. Feel better." I said as I hung up the phone and continued to pace.

Mrs. Tucker was like my security blanket since I had moved to town. It had been fine when I thought she would be returning soon, but to think that she wouldn't be home for weeks... That killed me. I missed her.

Needing someone to talk to, and vent about everything that had happened with Edward, I called the one person who I knew would be here with in five minutes and give me some good, level headed advice.

"Hello?" She sang down the phone. I could hear metal clanging in the background as well as the sound of Taylor Swift's new album.

"Hey, Alice," I mumbled miserably.

The metal clanging stopped. "What's wrong?" She demanded.

I flopped down onto a chair. "A really crappy morning that just got worse."

"Give me five minutes."

* * *

Five minutes later I heard Alice's high heels clicking against the floor as she rushed in with two cups of coffee and took a seat next to me at the table.

I looked up and noticed that her face was flushed with anger, her blue eyes darkened with fury.

"What happened?" I asked as she threw Sweet 'N' Low on the table.

She shook her head quickly. "No. You tell me what happened with you and what made you miserable and then I will tell you all about me."

"Okay..." I trailed off, intimidated by the small woman's anger. She was scary when she was angry.

Alice watched sat with wide eyes as I told her all about what had happened just hours earlier and then filled her in on my conversation with Mrs. Tucker.

"Is she going to be okay?" She demanded, her eyes filled with worry.

I nodded my head as I blew on my hot coffee. "Yes, she's just in no shape to travel back home and even if she was she lives in that house all by herself. I know she'd rather beat me to death with one of her Russian spy novels then let me help her, so it looks like she's going to be gone for a few more weeks."

"Wow that is a sucky day." She muttered. "As for Edward, I don't understand why he'd react like that. He never used to be the jealous type," She shrugged. "It doesn't sound like him at all."

"I know," I agreed quickly. "The Edward standing there today is not the Edward I know and the Edward I am in love with. I don't know what happened and now he's angry with me, I'm angry with him and neither one of us wants to make the first move. At least, that's what I'm hoping it is," I added with a frown. I didn't want to think that he just wasn't calling because he didn't want to see me.

Alice placed a reassuring hand on mine. "I'm sure that's what it is. Edward loves you."

I sighed. I was tired of worrying about what had happened today. It was giving me a headache. I didn't think I did anything wrong, if I did I would gladly apologize, but unless he told me what, I was the dark. I didn't like being in the dark with Edward.

"Tell me something, anything." I pleaded.

Alice frowned, her eyes filling with uncertainty. "I don't know if I should." She admitted.

"Why not?" I demanded, wanting to know what could be so bad that she would be worried about telling me what it was.

"It might upset you."

I laughed. Upset me? Could it get any worse than what was already going on? "Trust me, Alice; I am incapable of reaching another level of upset. Lay it on me," I sighed.

"Well, I was talking to Elise Baker this morning and she heard that Tanya has been talking a lot recently about you and Edward. About how she didn't think the two of you would last and that you were too weird for him and basically just a fling. That she was planning on getting back," She added carefully as if she were afraid I was going to haul off and hit the messenger.

"Seriously?" I demanded in disbelief. I had only ever met Tanya once, and that was when Edward was making a date with me to get out of a date with her, or so I'd thought. Also as far as I knew Edward hadn't even been in contact with her since or given her any indication that she was in with a shot, so why would she be plotting to break us up?

"Tanya always had a thing for Edward, even though she slept with most of the guys in our class, it was always him. I think when she found out he was coming home she sort of made plans for the two of them."

"And I came along and messed up her plans," I finished. "Great."

Alice laughed. "Don't worry about it. Edward isn't interested in her. He loves you."

"I know that. I know Edward has way more integrity than to cheat on me or lead a girl on. So, why doesn't he know that about me?"

Alice shrugged her shoulders gracefully. "That's something you're going to have to ask him?"

I smiled sadly. "I could have, but I told him not to bother coming by. Not exactly the most mature way to handle the situation, but I was angry. I still am." I admitted.

"That's good. You're allowed to be angry. When you're ready and he's groveled enough to your satisfaction, then get the information you want." She giggled.

I couldn't help, but join in on her laughter. It was so infectious.

"So, what happened before you came in here? I was afraid you were going to attack me." I teased her.

Alice's dancing eyes faded, as did her laughter. It was always so strange to see that while Alice had this bright and bubbly persona, on the inside there was so much sadness. It was heartbreaking.

"I saw Jasper in the coffee shop. He was with another woman. She was blond and pretty and they were laughing." She tried to make her words come out light and breezy, but I heard her pain. Felt it. I knew then, that her anger from before had worn off and it had just left sadness.

I held her hand tightly in mine. "Alice, he loves you. Even I know that. I'm sure, no I know, it had to be innocent." I told her with certainty. I don't know who the blond was or what they were doing there together, but Jasper loved Alice. The man hadn't dated or even touched another woman since he and Alice broke up, it was a known thing amongst the guys. Did she know that?

Before I could speak her phone started blaring.

"Hi Jess," She greeted, clearing her throat and trying to get back to her carefree persona. "Oh, shit, I'll be right there," She said as she grabbed her purse, and hanging up her phone. "I have to go the bathroom upstairs has flooded or something and it's leaking through the roof. Just what I needed," She hissed as she bent to kiss me on the cheek before rushing out.

I tried to keep busy for the rest of the day and ignore the huge elephant in the room which was also known as my tiny cell phone. It was amazing how something that could fit in my pocket quite comfortably suddenly seemed so big.

Edward didn't call and by the time it came to closing, I didn't want to go home and wait for him to call there. I refused to be that woman and since Alice was still busy with her shop, I decided a little extra work never hurt anybody. My plan was to go through the books and write a few recommendations. Mrs. Tucker usually did that since I preferred romance novels and she'd read anything she could get her hands on.

It was twenty minutes later, reading someone's autobiography that I fell asleep at a table, locked in an empty library.

* * *

I pulled up outside my house two hours later, with a kink in my neck and a headache from the rain pounding around me. Id woken up in the worst mood thanks to my aching body and swore to only ever sleep in a comfortable bed again.

Muttering about the annoying weather, I jumped out of my car and ran onto the porch, almost screaming when I saw someone waiting for me there.

Like all my prayers were answered, Edward was on my porch, waiting for me. I wondered how long he'd been out here and felt awful; it wasn't exactly warm out tonight.

He stood up as I approached his hands in his pockets and looking sexier than anyone should be in the moonlight.

"Where have you been?" he asked as I stepped toward him and felt the anger from earlier today come back tenfold.

Though his voice had been soft, gentle, his eyes were full of suspicion. There had been no contact all day, and all night, and this was all he cared about? I had been afraid to call him for this very reason. Edward may be here tonight, but so were those walls that he'd built this morning and I wasn't in the mood for either. I was sleepy, grouchy, aching all over and the only thing I needed was ice cream, a good chick flick and an even better night's sleep. Not for the man that I had trusted with my secrets and my heart to look at me like I had done something to question his faith in me.

"I've been out having sex with random strangers," I snapped. Most likely not my most graceful moment, but I'd had enough for one day.

"Bella wait," he pleaded as I brushed past him and unlocked the front door.

I spun around to face him. "What? Now you want to talk? You want to accuse me of cheating on you again?" I sneered.

I saw the anger flash in his eyes.

"I never accused you of cheating on me," he protested.

"No, you just acted like an asshole. Like I was flirting with some guy or making out in the reference section!" I bit out.

He sighed tiredly. "I know you weren't doing anything. I just walked in and saw you together and got jealous." When he finished he lame ass explanation he just stood there, waiting for me to shrug it off and go back to normal.

"Are you freakin' kidding me?" I demanded. "That's it? That's your big explanation? Edward, I was talking to a man, one who had been nothing but nice to me since I got here. He would come in, try to make me smile, even though I was so rude to him that I know I didn't deserve his kindness. So, after talking to you and Alice about expanding my social circle, I thought who better than the young man who has been nothing but sweet to me. You didn't know any of that, did you? No," I answered for him. "You didn't. Your crappy explanation is that you got a case of the green eyed monster. Well, guess what buddy, it's not good enough. You shut down on me earlier and then you stormed out and that has been it all day. You don't call, text, email. Hell, I would have settled for a carrier pigeon. I couldn't even call you because I was worried that you just didn't want to see me. If you were just jealous, Edward, then this wouldn't be an issue." I snapped out, my heart pounding as I ranted at him. It was surprising, earlier today I had been sad. It's amazing how a crappy nap on a wooden chair can change your mood.

"Bella-" He started, but I cut him off.

"If anyone should be jealous, it's me. Half the women in town drool over Edward Cullen," I spat his name out. "I have to hear from Alice today that Tanya had plans to steal you away from me and I'm guessing the whole town will just jump on that band wagon since I don't have that many friends in town. I had been trying to fix that today by making some progress on those social skills of mine." I said pointedly at him.

"Tanya is doing what?" He demanded.

"Of course that's what you would focus on," I muttered as I shook my head. "Tanya want's you back. She plans to lure you away from me somehow like some bad high school drama. You know what though, Edward? When Alice told me about this, I shrugged it off. Do I want an enemy? No. Do I want some little sexy blond trying to seduce you into dumping me for her? Hell no. Do you I have faith in you to know that you would never sink that low and cheat on me? Yes! I have faith in you, Edward, why don't you have faith in me?" I demanded.

I watched as he struggled to speak. Struggled to let me in. "It's not about letting you in," He answered eventually.

I shook my head. "Edward, I know we're going to have fights. I know there are going to be some days when we want to strangle each other and I'm okay with that. I really am. But something is standing between us and you are letting it."

I turned and stormed into the house. I didn't have the energy to fight anymore because I would give in to those green eyes as they pleaded with me to forget about this and just go inside and be with the Edward I loved. I couldn't, wouldn't, though. I wanted my Edward. The one who made me feel safe and special and more loved than any woman could ever hope to be.

"I'm not going away, Bella!" He warned through the door. "If I have to, I'll stay out here all night."

I rolled my eyes. "I hope you enjoy the rain!" I answered and locked the door.

**A/N**** Hi! Don't hate me! So, Edward is locked out for the night, literally. Will he stay? Will Bella give in and let him inside? Let me know what you think! I know I promised his explanation in this chapter, but it would have just run on too long, so it will be up tomorrow! I promise!**


	15. Chapter 15

**A/N**** Hi guys! Thank you for all of your reviews, they make me smile so much! Please read and let me know what you thought!**

**EPOV**

"For fucks sake! What is it now?" I snarled as I wrenched open my office door.

Jasper stood on the opposite side with a grin on his face. "Good morning, Sunshine."

I growled at him and turned back towards my desk, where I had been scowling at the paper work in front of me.

Jasper chuckled as he closed the door behind me. "You're sexy when you're angry," He teased.

"I'm not in the mood, Jazz."

Jasper sat down in the seat opposite me and smirked. "Shocking. Now, why don't you tell aunty Jasper what got up your ass so much that you have a fifty year old secretary afraid to buzz the intercom and tell you that one of your oldest and dearest friends have arrived to see your pretty face." He suggested his eyes bright with amusement.

"Hasn't Emmett already told you? You and he gossip like a pair of old ladies at a weekly bridge club."

"Ouch," He chuckled. "I would have, but Emmett is out on patrol and told me that he wasn't talking to you. Come on, Eddie, share with the class."

I ran my fingers over my face in frustration. Not only at Jasper and his annoying cheerfulness, but at myself and how I had messed everything up.

I reluctantly told Jasper about earlier today. How I walked in the library to find Bella laughing with some random guy and how it had made me into a jealous prick. How I had let it make me into a jealous prick. I told him how Bella was sure that something else, something bigger, was going on and that I had refused to tell her. Refused to let her in, even after the trust that she had given me.

"What happened after that?" Jasper asked, showing no signs of judgment.

"I saw her eyes, she was hurt and angry and I was worried that maybe I had fucked up, so I asked her if she wanted me to stop by later. Every night, if I have the time, I go round and help her close up. We talk, we kiss and it was just something that we did and she said no. I fucked up." I admitted quietly, my anger, my protection, drained and I was just left feeling tired and hurt and ashamed. Bella had put so much faith in me and I hadn't returned the gesture.

"Yeah, you did." He answered quietly.

I glared at him. "What? No crappy advice on how to make things better? No pep talk about how it will all work itself out?"

Jasper shrugged. "Who am I to give advice? My own woman can barely look at me if I pass her on the street. It's not like I have all the answers, Edward. If I did, Alice would be with me, in my bed, in my house with my ring on her goddamn finger right now. I don't have the answers," he repeated. "I just know that you screwed up and not so much because you got jealous. A little bit of jealousy is good for a relationship. I'm thinking what hurt Bella is that after everything she has shared with you when it came down to it, you didn't trust her enough to share your past."

I sighed, knowing he was right. Hating myself for hurting Bella. "What do I do?"

"You fix it," he shrugged. "You go to her, you make it right. More importantly, my friend, you grovel. Don't worry, your knees will take it," he grinned as he got to his feet.

"Where are you off to?" I asked. Wasn't he going to stay and help me plan how fix this?

"I have a meeting. Apparently, you're not the only one whom screwed up lately. This woman hired a private detective to have her husband followed. He's been cheating on her with at least two women in the past month alone. She's taking him for everything he has. I'm going to meet her in the coffee shop. She doesn't want him aware that she's filing for divorce until she's ready. Something about dramatic effect," Jasper mumbled before leaving.

Sighing, I got to my feet. I had to go and see Bella. I had to apologize and make things right. I would have called her but after the way I messed things up today, she deserved more than that.

I glanced up when my door was shoved open. "Sheriff Cullen, there's been huge traffic accident." My secretary panted.

I sighed at the delay, but in a community this small, all hands were needed.

"I'm on my way."

* * *

It was close to ten at night and Bella still wasn't home. The library closed at seven every night, so where was she?

After coming back from the site of the car crash, I was tired, grouch, and I just wanted to have a nice long hot shower and crawl into bed with Bella in my arms. That was if she ever came home.

I had sat out here for oven an hour now, expecting her to turn up at any minute. She never did. I started to wonder what could be taking her so long. Had she gone to Alice's house or even gone for a drink at the bar. She had gone in there a lot with me and had become a kind of a local, she could be there.

The longer I sat there, the more the little voice in my head, the one who had spoken up when I had seen Bella with that man earlier today, started to whisper in my ear.

I hated the voice. I had never even had one until that day. At the lowest point in my life when the bitch had just so much worse. I had needed someone during that time and she had thrown everything in my face and destroyed my trust. I didn't want that to spread to my relationship with Bella, but seeing her with that guy... I hadn't been able to help it.

I sat up when I heard her car pull in. She didn't seem to notice me as she tilted her head from side to side as if it bothered her. I didn't like the fact that I had to guess at these things. Normally, if she'd hurt herself I knew.

She didn't notice me until she got out of her car and I got to my feet to face her.

"Where have you been?" I asked inwardly flinching at my tone. I had meant to have it come out casually, but even I could hear the hint of suspicion.

I wanted to cringe when I saw anger flick in her eyes. Even tired, hurt and angry, she was still beautiful. I just wish that it wasn't all due to me.

"I've been out having sex with random strangers," she snapped as she made her way onto the porch.

I couldn't help the anger that rose not only at her words, but at her tone. I was trying to make things, better. I was trying to apologize. I should have known it wouldn't have been that easy.

"Bella wait," I pleaded as she unlocked her front door. I didn't want to argue or make her upset.

She whirled round to face me, anger darkening her eyes so they almost look blank in the darkness. "What? Now you want to talk? You want to accuse me of cheating on you again?" she sneered.

I felt the anger rise up in me again. "I never accused you of cheating on me," I protested.

"No, you just acted like an asshole. Like I was flirting with some guy or making out in the reference section!" She bit out coldly.

I sighed tiredly. "I know you weren't doing anything. I just walked in and saw you together and got jealous." I finished, hoping that she could start to see things from my side.

"Are you freakin' kidding me?" she demanded. "That's it? That's your big explanation? Edward, I was talking to a man, one who had been nothing but nice to me since I got here. He would come in, try to make me smile, even though I was so rude to him that I know I didn't deserve his kindness. So, after talking to you and Alice about expanding my social circle, I thought who better than the young man who has been nothing but sweet to me. You didn't know any of that, did you? No," she answered for me. "You didn't. Your crappy explanation is that you got a case of the green eyed monster. Well, guess what buddy, it's not good enough. You shut down on me earlier and then you stormed out and that has been it all day. You don't call, text, email. Hell, I would have settled for a carrier pigeon. I couldn't even call you because I was worried that you just didn't want to see me. If you were just jealous, Edward, then this wouldn't be an issue." She snapped out.

I felt the shame pour over me. I had done this. It was my fault and when all she wanted was an explanation I had shut down on her. She deserved better.

"Bella-" I started, but she cut me off.

"If anyone should be jealous, it's me. Half the women in town drool over Edward Cullen," she spat my name out. "I have to hear from Alice today that Tanya had plans to steal you away from me and I'm guessing the whole town will just jump on that band wagon since I don't have that many friends in town. I had been trying to fix that today by making some progress on those social skills of mine." She said pointedly.

"Tanya is doing what?" I demanded. Was the woman insane?

"Of course that's what you would focus on," She muttered as she shook her head. "Tanya want's you back. She plans to lure you away from me somehow like some bad high school drama. You know what though, Edward? When Alice told me about this, I shrugged it off. Do I want an enemy? No. Do I want some little sexy blond trying to seduce you into dumping me for her? Hell no. Do you I have faith in you to know that you would never sink that low and cheat on me? Yes! I have faith in you, Edward, why don't you have faith in me?" She demanded.

She was right. I hadn't put that faith in but it wasn't what she thought. I struggled with my need to keep something that was such a sore memory and the need to be honest with her like she needed. "It's not about letting you in," I answered eventually, feeling like I had let her down.

She shook her head. "Edward, I know we're going to have fights. I know there are going to be some days when we want to strangle each other and I'm okay with that. I really am. But something is standing between us and you are letting it."

I watched as she turned at stormed into the house, slamming the door behind her. I wanted to shout out the truth. To tell her why it was so hard for me to tell her, but I couldn't. I didn't know why it was so hard. I had told her about my failures as a police officer, so why couldn't I tell her about my failures as a man?

"I'm not going away, Bella!" I warned through the door. "If I have to, I'll stay out here all night."

"I hope you like the rain, then." I heard her call out and heard her turn the lock.

That pretty much said everything, I thought. I stayed there for an hour, listening to the god awful Jana Kramer album that she loved so much. It's like she knew I hated it and turned it up full blast just to annoy me. When the wind got a little too much I took cover in my car, hoping that maybe she'd take a little pity on me and let me in.

When I saw her in the upstairs window looking down at my car, I let myself hope for a moment. When she pulled the shutters closed I knew I was out for the night.

**BPOV**

I opened the window shutters and cursed when I saw Edwards's car parked outside. Had he been there all night? It was freezing outside.

I rushed down the stairs, barefoot and in my _'I Run With Vampires'_ t-shirt and sweats.

It was freezing outside and wet and I wanted to go back inside as quickly as possible so I had no idea how he was feeling. I had expected him to leave after an hour at most.

I looked into Edwards's car and there he was. Even in his sleep he looked uncomfortable. All six foot two of him was crammed into the driver's seat, his head resting against the window at an odd angle and I knew that my sore neck from yesterday would be nothing compared to what he would feel when he woke up.

Though I wanted to stay angry and upset, I couldn't help it as my heart softened at the sight of him out here. He'd stayed outside all night, knowing I wasn't going to answer the door or let him in. He'd stayed.

Sighing, I walked around and quietly slid into the passenger seat.

I didn't want to argue anymore. I didn't want to be fighting with Edward. I just wanted to know what was going on.

I reached over and ran my fingers through his strange colored hair. It was soft and thick and I knew exactly how it felt as it tickled my sensitive skin.

"Wake up, honey," I murmured, smiling slightly when he jolted awake even though my voice had been gentle.

"Bella," he muttered as he sat up and dragged his hands across his face, grimacing at the feel of hi stubbled cheeks. "I thought you didn't want to see me."

"And I thought that you would have gone home a long time ago," I replied with a smile.

He shrugged his shoulders as he smoothed out his wrinkled shirt with a frown. After realising there was no way to smooth them out he turned to me with a tired smile.

"I told you that I wasn't going anywhere."

I smiled as I stared out the windshield. "You've said a lot of things. Most of them to do with trusting each other and being honest."

I didn't feel any satisfaction when he flinched at my words. I hadn't meant to hurt him or shame him. I just wanted to point out that he had showed me how important it was to be open and honest. I had no illusions that if Edward told me what was happening with him now that we would skip off into the sunset, that would never happen. I did think that honesty made a relationship. I needed to know that when I freaked out in the future and tried to run, that he'd be there. He'd sit out in the rain like he had last night.

That's why I was sitting here with him. I was here because sitting out in the freezing cold, squashed up in his car was something the Edward I loved would do. I didn't want throw it away.

"You need to talk to me, Edward." I told him. "I'm not perfect, I'm not going to sit here and lie and say that all because I told you about my past means that I will never get scared and try and run, but I want to try. I want to be with you and I want to love you and to do that, I need to understand why yesterday happened."

Edward sat there quietly for a long time and I wondered whether he would shrug it off.

"I didn't tell you the whole story the other night," He whispered. "I was dating a woman named Irina in Chicago. We met at a bar and things moved pretty quickly. She was beautiful and smart and made me think that I had it all. I thought I loved her."

I ignored the flare of jealousy that raged through me. The last thing either of us needed was another jealous outburst.

"After what happened with the little girl and her mother, I needed her more than ever. I needed to be needed, I guess. I came home one day and found her in bed, our bed, with Laurent. My partner."

I felt my jaw drop. She'd cheated on him with his partner and in his bed! What the hell was wrong with this woman?

"I couldn't believe it," he said quietly. "I trusted her, Bella. I trusted him. They blamed me," he chuckled humorlessly.

"What?" I demanded, torn between fury and horror at what he was telling me. How could they blame it on him? They were the ones who had betrayed and disrespected him in such a way.

"Yeah," He drawled as he leaned his head back. "I walked in on them in my bed and they came running out, wrapped up in sheets and rumpled clothes, saying how I must have seen this coming. How I had pushed her away and made her feel unloved and unwanted because I was so wrapped up in my own problems."

"Bitch!" I burst out, unable to hold it in any longer. They had betrayed him and then used what he had been through, what he was going through, against him.

He chuckled. "Thanks for that. That's another reason why I was so eager to leave Chicago, Bella. I didn't want to be there. I didn't want to have to see them every day. I just wanted to come home. Then I met you and I was so lost in you that for a while, I forgot all about what happened." He laughed softly. "Sound's strange, doesn't it? I forgot all about her and what had happened. All I thought about was you and our future together. How I knew that I had never really loved her because when I saw you, I knew what love was. What it was supposed to feel like."

I pulled his hand into mine, entwining our fingers together. This was my Edward. I had missed him.

"That doesn't sound strange," I smiled. "I've had my own moments like that since I met you."

He pulled my fingers up to his mouth and pressed a kiss to the back of my hand. It was like I could feel the wall that had been between us being torn down.

"I walked in the library yesterday and saw you standing there, laughing and talking and I saw her. I saw her with Laurent for weeks before that day. She would always say how sweet he was, how funny and I never paid it much attention. She loved me, right? Why should I be jealous? Yesterday, I saw you and that guy and I was back there, walking into that bedroom and having my last shred of faith ripped away from me."

"Why didn't tell me?" I whispered, my heart breaking for him.

"I was ashamed and embarrassed. No matter how much women roll their eyes and call us cavemen, when your woman goes to another man because she's not getting enough from you... It more than damages more than your pride, Bella. I can't describe it accurately, but seeing her with another man... it just cuts you down right at the knees. A real man keeps his woman happy, right?"

Understanding dawned on me. This was a guy thing. I'd heard it before that it was a lot harder for me to forgive women for cheating then it was for women because men couldn't stand the thought of someone touching what was 'his'. It made them feel like they were less of a man. That's how Edward felt.

"Edward," I sighed.

"I know," he replied. "I'm an idiot. It was them and not me and I couldn't have done anything to change it, right? I have told myself that so many times and it doesn't change anything. I saw you with that man yesterday and this voice came out of nowhere telling me that maybe you'd be happier with him. Irina was happier with someone else. I don't like this, Bella. I don't like feeling like this, but I can't change it."

I looked at him for a long time and saw that he was telling the truth. He didn't like feeling so insecure, about feeling less of a man because he thought that maybe Irina didn't find him man enough and had to go looking for someone else.

I found it strange that people always said that women were hard understands. Men were just as bad. I didn't understand why his cheating bitch of an ex would make him feel like he wasn't a man, but it did. It hurt him and it cost him his pride and his trust.

I realised that words weren't going to change how Edward felt. Actions would and time.

It wasn't easy, but I got to my knees and moved so that I was straddling Edward's lap, the steering wheel pressed into my back and my knee was crushed between the seat and the cold metal work of the car, but being pressed against Edward made it all worth it. Especially when his hands came to rest on my hips instinctively.

I leaned down and slowly covered Edward mouth with my own, deepening the kiss as I gripped his hair and moved my body against his. Soon, the cold was forgotten, the lack of sleep was forgotten and I was lost in Edward.

"I'm not Irina," I whispered as I pulled back. "I don't want anybody else. I only want you."

I saw the desperation in his eyes. The need to believe me.

"I'm not going anywhere. I don't mind having to prove it's you I want. It'll be easy." I smiled.

For the first time all morning I saw his eyes brighten with happiness. And for the first time since he had walked in the library yesterday, I saw faith.

* * *

"This is so good!" I groaned as I bit into a sausage and egg sandwich, that was smothered in ketchup. Edward had curled his lip in disgust. The man had no taste.

Edward and I had decided to travel to the local diner to get some food since both of us were tired and not in the mood for cooking.

He rolled his eyes as he bit into his sandwich.

It was good. I had worried for a moment that this fight would affect us and our relationship, but as soon as were communicating things had gone back to how they had always been. Fun and sweet and loving. It was good to be back.

I looked around at the people who no longer stared at me. They were all going about their day and I wasn't anything special to them. I had been at one point, but not any longer and it was thanks to the man in front of me. He had encouraged me to do this and I knew he would always encourage me.

A voice pierced our little blissful bubble.

"Sheriff, I want you to arrest his woman."

**A/N**** Who is it? Please review and let me know. I tried to explain why Edward reacted as he did, but I felt like I just couldn't get it right and maybe that's because as men don't understand women, I don't understand men. I just knew why he reacted and what had caused it...**


	16. Chapter 16

**A/N Hi guys! I would like to thank you all so much for your wonderful reviews! They all made me laugh so much! Also, sorry for the late update, but after Breaking Dawn Part 2 and the hangover that the devil himself created, I was in no shape to finish a chapter. Have you watched the movie yet? If you have, what did you think? In this chapter we get to see who is demanding Bella's arrest and we also get to see what Bella was like before the attack. The person she was before her life came crashing down. I hope you like the chapter!**

**EPOV**

"Sheriff, I want you to arrest his woman."

Our morning had been perfect until this voice came and ruined it.

Sometime during the night, I understood that Bella deserved the truth, even at the cost of my pride and ego. I hadn't spoken to anyone about what Irina had done, even my parents thought that we had just gone our seperate ways because I was moving home and I'd let them keep that belief.

I should have known that Bella wouldn't react how I thought she would. Instead of waking up alone in my car, Bella had been there, her fingers running gently through my hair and my entire body had rejoiced. I had missed her touch.

Instead of demanding answers, she'd asked for them, telling me that I needed to talk to her. Not in a way that said that if I didn't then we would have the same fight over and over, but in a way that said she just needed me to talk to her. To let her know what was going on in my head.

I did. I knew she deserved that after the trust she had put in me. She hadn't tried to give me some crappy advice that you'd find in the back of a newspaper, which I was grateful for. She had just climbed onto my lap, kissed me and said that I was the only one she wanted. That meant more to me than anything. No poetic words or grand promises, just a simple truth. And it was the truth. I was a cop and trained to look for lies and all I'd seen in Bella's beautiful dark eyes was honesty.

We had come here to the diner because we were both tired and hungry and neither of us was in the mood to cook. Bella had looked at me in disgust when I had cringed at the sight of her sandwich, the ketchup made it look like it was bleeding. The woman had questionable taste.

It was all going well until someone had demanded Bella's arrest. Like hell!

I looked up at the blond woman coolly.

"On what grounds?" I demanded quietly.

The woman wasn't intimidated by my low tone or cold stare; she just placed her hand on her hip and smirked at me.

"For flashing a bunch of firefighters from my car when she was sixteen." She drawled and I couldn't help it as my jaw dropped in shock.

Bella's eyes widened as she jumped out of her seat.

The next thing that happened, Id only ever seen on the nature shows. They screamed and jumped and wrapped each other in their arms before starting the whole thing over again like it was some kind of ritualistic dance. I was man enough to admit that while I was glad that no one was trying to have Bella arrested, I was extremely intimidated by them.

"Rosalie, when the hell did you get here?" Bella demanded as she squeezed the life out of the woman. Instead of cringing away from her, the blond squeezed her back.

"I wanted to surprise you," the woman, Rosalie, laughed.

Bella pulled out of her arms to glare at her friend. "I have been calling you, but I only got through to your voicemail. I thought you'd finally fell off a cliff or something."

Rosalie blushed. "I was going to call you back, but everything kind of got out of hand in Australia and I just needed to get out of there."

Bella frowned. "Why? What happened?" She demanded. I had to smile at her protective tone.

"Turns out Royce liked to put him shrimp on the barbie all over town," Rosalie muttered in a bad Australian accent and I had to choke back laughter. I guessed it wouldn't be taken well by the ladies if I laughed at her misfortune. "He is a complete bastard and I hope he burns in hell," she added cheerfully.

Bella pulled her back into her arms. "Rosie, I'm so sorry. You know I never liked him, right?"

Rosalie threw her head back and laughed. "Bella, honey, you never liked anyone."

"Yeah," Bella agreed. "But I always thought his eyes were way too close together."

I frowned at her logic and had to stop myself from measuring the distance between my eyes to see what 'too close together' was.

Rosalie dismissed Bella's sympathy with a wave of her hand. "Oh, I'm not sorry. You're right his eyes were creepily close together and he was such a mommy's boy. He actually wanted to move out of our apartment and into her house with her! I couldn't get any work in Sydney because his mother actually has quite some pull over there and she wasn't too impressed when I told her that her son had a bigger dick on his forehead then he did in his pants."

Bella turned to roll her eyes at me when I choked on my drink at her friend's words.

"Anyway," Rosalie chuckled at me. "So since I couldn't get a photography gig in Sydney I thought I'd come and check Virginia for a while. I heard there's this really cool town called Sugar Grove..."

She didn't get to finish her sentence as Bella threw her arms around her and let out a squeal that could shatter every glass in sight.

"I can't believe it! I can't believe it!" Bella chanted over and over again and it melted my heart to see her revert back to the teenage girl she must have once been when she was around her closest friend. I had never even seen Rosalie before today and Bella rarely spoke about her past so she'd only told me a little about the woman squealing with Bella in front of me, but I knew that just for that spark that I saw in Bella's eyes, that I would love her.

The women started to talk so quickly, that I didn't have a hope in hell of understanding what they were talking about. I started to contemplate the idea of using these women to pass on top secret government information. No one would be able to understand them, I thought absently.

"I got in contact with the local newspaper on the plane and it turns out they actually have a position opening up for a photographer. It's not exactly what I'm used to, but working at Sugar Groves newspaper has some benefits," She chuckled when Bella pulled her into another bear hug before going back to their strange language that I couldn't decipher.

"You're staying with me!" Bella insisted.

I hadn't caught what Rosalie had said before as I was too busy watching Bella and the laughter that lit her eyes. I had never seen her like this before.

"Bella, I can't just move in with you," Rosalie argued.

Bella snorted. "This coming from the woman who used to crawl through my bedroom window at three in the morning because she'd had another argument with her mother and refused to go home."

Rosalie rolled her big blue eyes. "That was different."

"Yes," Bella agreed. "But before we used to share a room and now we have a house! Come on, Rosalie, we basically grew up in the same house. We know all of each other's annoying habits, so we should be fine!" She added brightly. I could see that she really wanted this to happen and I did, too. Rosalie made her happy and that meant everything.

Rosalie frowned. "Are you sure?"

I could see the actual concern that she would be imposing on her friend and I liked her for it.

"Of course and you know the girls love you," Bella laughed. I knew that 'the girls' were three furry felines.

"Okay, but only if you're sure." Rosalie gave in.

"Yay!" Bella squealed, clapping her hands in excitement.

It was then that I had this vision of Bella as a blond teenage girl, happy and unknowing of the world's cruelties.

As if suddenly remembered I existed, Bella turned back to me. "Edward Cullen, meet my best friend, Rosalie Hale," she introduced as the girls took a seat opposite me.

"The one who tricked you into dating him and declared his love after you gave him a black eye," she stated and I had to smile. Obviously Bella had told her about that little bit of information and I wondered what else she had told her.

"That would be me."

"He's hot," she told Bella as she looked me up and down. Not in a sexual way, but in a way you'd look a car up and down and wonder whether it was worth getting or not.

Bella just beamed back at her. "I know. You should see him without the clothes. It gets better."

I could feel my chest puffing out as they discussed my body. I liked that Bella liked my body and was proud enough to tell her friend. I liked how candidly she spoke to Rosalie.

I turned to smirk at Bella. "You flashed a bunch of firemen when you were in high school?"

Instead of blushing or looking embarrassed in anyway, Bella laughed. "It was a dare." She told me like that everything okay.

"No, it wasn't," Rosalie said in a sing song voice as she bit into Bella's sandwich.

"How did the two of you meet?" I asked as Bella scowled at her friend for eating her food and swiped her coke before Rosalie could reach for it.

It was obvious when they had met, but I still wanted to know the details. I wanted to hear happier memories from Bella's past.

It was Rosalie who answered as she brushed her long blond hair over her shoulder so she wouldn't get any ketchup in it.

"Oh, we met in kindergarten. Very sweet, it was. Bella came in with her pigtails, looking all abandoned and adorable and I decided that she needed a friend."

"No you didn't!" Bella interrupted indignantly.

"Yes, I did. Get over it." She turned to me. "Anyway, so I decided to take pity on her and went up to her and asked if she wanted to play. We've been best friends ever since," Rosalie shrugged.

Bella smiled. "Rosalie was the friend who came and visited me when I was in the asylum. She was the only one who ever visited me. Every weekend," She added softly.

Rosalie seemed confident and very happy go lucky, but I saw her eyes soften before me and the utter love and affection that filled her eyes when she looked at Bella and placed her hand gently over hers. "I had nothing better to do, anyway," she teased.

* * *

"Did Bellsie over here ever tell you about the time that she wanted to be a journalist?" Rosalie asked as the waitress delivered our deserts. When I had mentioned that it was maybe a little early for cake the girls had looked at me like I was stupid.

For the past twenty minutes Rosalie had been filling me in on some stories of Bella's childhood. I soaked it all up; eager for whatever Rosalie could tell me. Since we had met, I had told Bella a lot of my childhood stories, but she rarely spoke of her own. It was nice to hear them.

It was also nice to see them together. Bella was more confident and relaxed and happy. While I loved the sight of her, so happy and bright, I couldn't help feeling slightly envious. I wished Bella acted that way around me. It was stupid, I knew that, but Bella had once told me that you couldn't help how you felt.

I couldn't help but chuckle when Bella scowled at Rosalie. She obviously didn't want this story told.

"No, she didn't. What happened?" I asked and only grinned when Bella turned her scowl on me.

Rosalie giggled in excitement. "Well, she'd read this book where the heroine was this journalist who would do anything for a story and wouldn't let anything get in her way. Very Lois Lane." Rosalie smirked. "And when we were thirteen, Bella wanted to be just like this chick from this book. She even joined our school paper. When her brother mentioned that there were rumors that the high school football team were stealing test sheets _someone_," she glared at Bella, "decided that she would expose them." She rolled her eyes. "So, I, her Clark Kent, tagged along to make sure that Lois didn't get caught. We went into the school and were following the jocks and probably doing a terrible job of it. At one point we were crouched around the corner, wearing our black outfits even though it was the middle of the day and in a hallway that fluorescent lighting. That's when dumbass over here fell back onto her ass and started screaming bloody murder."

"I swear I felt something crack," Bella snapped defensively.

Rosalie snorted. "You landed on your ass, you were fine. So, Bella gets to her feet and drags me out into the hallway, hissing at me to go with it."

I frowned, trying to hide my laughter at the image of two thirteen year old girls running around a high school, following the jocks and getting themselves in trouble.

"What does that mean? What did she make you do?" I asked curiously.

Rosalie scowled. "She told them that we were following them because I had a crush on Danny Faye and wanted to ask him out."

I looked at Bella with an amused grin.

Bella blushed. "I was thirteen and it made perfect sense to me at the time. It worked, didn't it?" She snapped.

"It worked?" I demanded in disbelief. How could that have worked?

Bella grinned. "As you can see, Rosie over here is the hottest thing around and was even when she was thirteen. He was only a couple of years older than her."

"And as ugly as a horse's ass!" Rosalie barked.

"Did he buy it? Did you get your proof?" I teased.

Bella scowled. "I would have if _someone _didn't gag when Danny tried to kiss her," she growled at Rosalie. Obviously she hadn't gotten over that. I liked it.

"Hey," Rosalie snapped. "You never said anything about kissing. I am not a Russian spy. I wasn't about to whore myself out for evidence." She turned to me. "He was big and sweaty and had breath that was most likely radioactive, it was that bad. No way in hell could I have kissed that without losing my lunch."

Bella sighed sadly. "I never did get my evidence and Rosalie could never face Danny again."

"He told everyone that I came onto him and he turned me down. That I was just a kid," she rolled her eyes. "Even at thirteen I was out of his ugly ass league."

I couldn't help but laugh at their story. At them. The Bella I knew was very different to the Bella she had once been. Something's hadn't changed, though. Both versions of her were smart, passionate and brave.

**BPOV**

"So, what are we doing tonight?" Rosalie asked as we walked along the aisles in the town's only supermarket.

I smiled briefly over my shoulder. It was so good to have her here.

Edward had to leave because there had been some big accident on the freeway and even though it was his day off, he was still the Sheriff and he took that responsibility seriously. He had apologized to me and Rosalie and given me a tender kiss before leaving. He had looked so tired still and I felt awful because if it wasn't for me and our fight he would have been rested. When I had voiced that thought to Rosalie she had waved it off, saying that if I had thought there would be an emergency that required Edward's assistance, I would have at least let him sleep on the couch. That had made me smile. Rosalie could always do that.

"Well, I texted Edward while you were debating Rocky Road or Cookie Dough ice cream and told him that we were going to have a girly night so he could go and get some rest. He needs it."

Rosalie rolled her eyes. "Bella, he didn't look upset to me. He looked madly in love with you. I'm jealous," she admitted.

I was frowning over the difference in milk percentages when I noticed that Rosalie was reading something intently on her phone. "What are you reading?" I asked curiously.

"Your emails," she answered absently.

I laughed. "Why are you reading those? You could just ask me. As I am standing right in front of you," I pointed sarcastically.

Rosalie gave me a dirty look at my teasing. "You may leave something out. By the way, this Tanya sounds like a right bitch."

"Tell me about it," a high voice said from behind us.

Rosalie shook her head. "Why does this stuff always happen to me? Is that Tanya?" She asked normally when most people would have at least lowered their voices.

I shook my head before walking over to pull Alice into a hug.

"Alice, I want you to meet my friend Rosalie. She just moved to town."

Alice's eyes lit up. "So you're Rosalie." She smiled as she held out her hand.

"And you're not Tanya. Unfortunately," she added as she shook Alice's tiny hand.

"Tell me about it," Alice chuckled. "I cannot stand the woman. She causes so much more trouble than she's worth."

"And she is trying to steal Edward away." Rosalie added before turning to me. "Do you think Edward would arrest me for beating her up?" She asked seriously as Alice looked at me eagerly for the answer.

"I don't know about him, but I sure wouldn't. Your way to beautiful," A deep familiar voice said from behind us.

We all turned to see Emmett and Jasper standing behind us. Emmett was looking at Rosalie with a male's interest, which didn't seem to phase Rosalie in the slightest. Rosalie was stunningly beautiful and always had been. Every boy in school wanted her, whether they were younger or older, popular or geeky. Everyone thought she was beautiful with her long golden hair, striking blue eyes, elegant features and mile long legs. Emmett was no different, I could tell.

Jasper, on the other hand, barely looked at Rosalie. I noticed that he watched Alice as she avoided his gaze. I didn't know why. I could see how her cheeks flushed and her hands trembled slightly, sadness and longing filled her eyes. Why did she resist something, someone, she wanted so much.

Rosalie noticed what was happening with Alice and Jasper as much as I did and frowned before putting on a bright smile for Emmett. "Well, that's nice to know officer." She replied lowly. I resisted rolling my eyes. It was the voice that she used when she was flirting and very few men could resist.

Emmett was no exception as he grinned like she'd just offered him a lap dance. "Emmett McCarty." He introduced himself.

"Rosalie Hale." She replied, her glance flickering to Alice.

There was something that very few people knew about Rosalie, that she was the greatest friend anyone could have. She was confident, opinionated and happy go lucky to the outside, but when you were her friend you knew she was also fiercely loyal and loving and would go down to the wire to protect those she loved. I could tell that she liked Emmett, that there was something there, but her thoughts were on Alice's uncomfortable reaction around Jasper and she was wondering why.

"Well, I would love to stay and chat, but Bella, Alice and I have a slumber party to get ready for. Girls only. Sorry guys," she added unapologetically.

"That's a shame," Emmett answered, his eyes taking her in. "My friends and I were planning on going to the bar later tonight, stop if you'd like." He said, never taking his eyes off of Rosalie.

"We'll keep that mind." She replied.

"See you later, ladies," Emmett said as he walked away. Jasper nodded politely and left after one last glance at Alice.

"Slumber party?" Alice asked and I knew she was trying to change the subject.

Rosalie grinned. "Oh yeah. We have to come up with a plan to get that bitch to realize that Edward is taken and not to be touched by her skanky self."

"Here, here," I muttered with a frown. I didn't like Tanya.

"I'm all for that," Alice agreed.

"And then you need to tell me all about Mr. Sexy Ass McCarty. That man is hot," She chuckled.

**A/N**** There you go my wonderful ones. I hope you liked the chapter. If not, please tell me why. What did you think of Rosalie? Let me know!**


	17. Chapter 17

**A/N**** Hi guys! Here is another chapter. I guess I'm making up for the past few days, lol! I hope you like the chapter and please review!**

**BPOV**

"Ugh," I grimaced as I took a sip of wine. I had never liked wine. Red, white, sweet or dry, it all tasted like crap to me. Alice had told me to pour some lemonade into it, that it would make it taste better. It hadn't. Now, my drink was like some weird hybrid that made me want to vomit.

Alice laughed. "You don't have much tolerance for alcohol, do you?"

I frowned. "I do. I just like it when you can't tell its alcohol. It's like having the best of both worlds. I will never understand why people willingly drink this and then act like it tastes good," I whispered, feeling a little tipsy. I didn't drink much, so I was fair game to the disgusting wine.

Rosalie giggled from her spot on the floor as she chewed on a strawberry lace. "She never had any tolerance for it. I got her once when she came home from that place her bitch of an aunt put her in and she threw up everywhere."

We all burst out laughing at my expense before I took another sip and shook my head, as if that could help in some way.

We'd had the best day. We had gone shopping for tonight and gotten some new sexy flannel pajamas to wear. It was in the middle of the store when Edward called me to remind me that we had tickets to go and see the latest Twilight movie. With our fight and Rosalie's return, I had completely forgotten. So, since he was going to be busy all day, he'd told me to go with the girls. That he really didn't mind missing it and joining the guys for a beer instead. That's when Id demanded whether or not he was really at work and just wanted to get out of the movie. He had laughed at me and told me he had already ordered tickets for next week so the two of us could go together. He was amazing.

The girls had borrowed some of my Twilight t-shirts and we'd gotten dressed up to go and see the last movie of the series. I was excited to see the movie, but sad to see it end. We had left the movie with soft smiles, all of us feeling warm and toasty inside at the movies perfect ending and contemplating turning around to go and watch it again. It was only the fact that the other showings were sold out that had us reluctantly returning to my house and deciding to watch the other movies as we sat in our new pajamas and drank wine, ate sweets and gushed about the hotties on screen.

It was around midnight when Rosalie finally turned to Alice and demanded what she had wanted to know since earlier this morning.

"What is going on between you and Jasper?" she slurred.

Alice didn't tense up like she usually did and the mention of his name, she just sighed and necked her wine. Disgusting.

"Jasper," she sighed. "We met when we were just babies. Before we knew what boyfriend and girlfriend meant. It was like we were always supposed to be together. There was none of the high school drama, no lives triangles, no make ups and break ups. We were just happy and in love," she smiled sadly.

"Then what changed?" Rosalie asked as she took a healthy sip of her wine.

Alice was quiet for a moment as she gathered her thoughts. "My father was a horrible man. He cheated on my mother constantly. He made her think it was something that she did, that it was her fault, when it wasn't. There is no excuse for cheating or violence in my book. When he left and my mother was a mess, crying every night for him to come home, it was Jasper who held me. It was Jasper who promised that everything would be fine. Then, a few weeks before our wedding, Lauren came up to me and said that he'd gotten drunk and they had..." She trailed off, her eyes filling with tears.

"That they'd slept together," Rosalie finished quietly.

"Yes. She told me that he was so drunk and so was she, and that they both regretted it, but she thought that I deserved to know."

I hated this Lauren chick. It was obvious when you looked at Jasper that drunk or not, he could never hurt Alice that way.

"How did you react?" Rosalie asked.

"I was furious and betrayed and in pain. I went round to Jasper and demanded to know the truth and he denied it of course, but I didn't believe him. I didn't trust him. I called off the wedding and said I never wanted to see him again."

We all sat there quietly whilst Alice composed herself.

"Alice, I don't know you all that well, yet, but I know what I saw today. I don't he think he did it. The way he looked at you. It was like the sun rose and set with you."

"He hasn't dated anyone else, Alice. Edward told me that he and Emmett make fun of him because he won't touch another woman. He only wants you."

Alice looked at me with such hope in her eyes.

"Why didn't you say this before?" Rosalie demanded as she hit my arm. "For that matter, why haven't you knocked some sense into this girl?"

"Firstly, ow! Second, I don't get involved in other people privacy. We're not all like you, Rose." I snapped.

Rosalie just rolled her eyes. "You're female, Bella, it's in your nature to stick your nose in where it doesn't belong. Accept it. Embrace it. Alice, explain to me why you are not together right now. You must see it. Hell, I only just met him and I can see it. He loves you and you love him."

Alice sat there quietly. "I do believe him."

"What?" I gasped. "What do you mean you believe him?"

She smiled sadly up at me. "I believed him a long time ago. I had time to think and time to see that Lauren had wanted Jasper since high school. He had just never wanted her. I looked back on that day and I saw the malice in her eyes, the joy at the thought of our wedding being cancelled."

"Then why aren't you with him now, you little idiot?" I demanded. Screw not getting involved right now.

"I didn't know how to go back. By the time I came to my senses it had already been over a month. I spent a month ignoring him, and acting as if he were the devil himself. I keyed his car, Bella! I called him every asshole the under the sun. I said horrible things to him. How could I just go back and act as if nothing had happened?"

"But the way you acted, like you hated him," I mumbled in confusion.

"A good offense is the best defense, right?" She quoted miserably. "I had said and done so many inexcusable things, I knew he would never take me back. He had always been there, he had never given me cause to doubt him and yet at the first hurdle, I did. I didn't trust him. I let him down. I knew there was no going back and so I went on the defensive, like a little coward to protect myself."

"I think you're just human, Alice." Rosalie smiled softly. "You were brought up thinking that men always strayed and that they were liars, of course it would be hard for you to trust. It must have been awful to think that the man who loved you had betrayed you, too. Why would you think Lauren lied? It's always easier to believe the bad and protect yourself against it, then to believe the good and to have your heart ripped out when you're proved wrong."

I looked at Rosalie sharply, she just smiled. "Some girls told me that Royce was cheating, but I believed him. Why wouldn't I, right? He'd never given me reason to doubt him. He was loving and sweet and said I was the only girl for him and so I believed him. I was proved wrong. I was hurt and humiliated and I felt like an idiot for believing him. No one had the right to judge you, Alice. You did what you thought you needed to do."

Alice nodded, tears streaming down her face. "I want him back. I love him. I never stopped. I can't think of being with someone else. It's him. It's always been him. There's just this bride between us now, one I created and I don't know how to cross it." She admitted.

Rosalie wrapped her arm around Alice and pulled her to her. "You want to know how to cross the bridge? You take the first step."

"I don't know if I can. What if he hates me?" She asked, her voice quivering.

"You have to take it. He may not always be on the other side." Rosalie told her.

"No," I disagreed. "He'll be there, Alice. I think that's what you need to learn from all of this. Jasper is waiting for you. He loves you and he wants you and he'll always be there. Waiting for you. The question is, do you really want to waste any more time because you're afraid?"

"No."

**EPOV**

After a long day of diverting traffic and dealing with one problem after the other, it was damn good to sit back in the bar and drink a ice cold beer.

I had received an in-depth text message from Bella about the new film and I was pretty sure that I didn't need to watch the movie now, but she insisted we go next week. She was currently having a slumber party with Rosalie and Alice and I liked that, I liked that she was spending more time with people. Though, I did have to admit, I much preferred the idea of snuggling up on the couch with her and the cats. Even if it meant watching The Twilight Saga for the fiftieth time.

While I loved sitting here at the bar and spending time with my buddies, I didn't love that Jasper was mooning around over his run in with Alice and Emmett would shut up about Rosalie.

"She is so hot!" Emmett groaned. "All that silky hair and those lips. Those full, red lips! Did I mention her eyes? Big and blue and made me think of sexy nights on silk sheets."

"Jesus Christ, Emmett," I muttered as I took a pull of beer. Yes, Rosalie was beautiful, but she was no Bella. By the look on Jaspers face I guessed that he was thinking the same about Alice.

"Do us a favor, Emmett? Shut the hell up," he growled as he tore a napkin to shreds.

"You're just jealous. Rosalie is hot and sexy and you wished that you could have a woman like her," Emmett smirked.

"I'd settle for a reply," Jasper muttered as Emmett continued to ramble on about Rosalie. I wondered what Bella would think of Emmett's new obsession.

I felt for Jasper. He was trying to be patient, but it was killing him. I thought about how Id cope if Bella shut me out for months on end. I hadn't exactly coped with as much grace as Jasper and that was only for a day.

"Whitlock!"

Our heads snapped around as a familiar voice called Jaspers name.

Alice, Bella and Rosalie stood in the doorway wearing Twilight t-shirts and jeans.

I watched as Bella and Rosalie all but shook in excitement, while Alice looked determinedly at one of my best friends.

"Alice?" Jasper murmured as he got to his feet.

Alice grinned, her eyes twinkling with happiness and walked up to Jasper, her heels clicking against the floor.

I watched in shock as Alice threw herself into Jaspers arms, nearly knocking him on his ass, and covered his mouth with hers. Jasper didn't hesitate as he wrapped his arms around her and lifted her off the ground, crushing her body to his as he deepened the kiss.

"Go Alice!" Rosalie and Bella squealed as the couple kissed in front of everyone without a care.

Alice pulled back slightly. "I'm sorry," she whispered. "I should have believed you. I was just scared to and then I felt like I'd messed everything up and I didn't see a way to fix it. I didn't know if I could so I did the stupid thing and made it worse. Can you ever forgive me?"

Jasper shook his head. "Silly girl," he murmured with a loving smile. "I love you, Alice. There's only you."

Alice smiled and breathed a sigh of relief. "Can we go somewhere? Just us," She added glancing around at everyone in the bar who was listing intently.

Jasper grinned. "I'd like that."

The two walked out of the bar, hand in hand and didn't even seem to realize that anyone else was in the room. They only had eyes for each other.

I smiled. It seemed like everything was coming together. The two of them loved each other so much; it was good to see that they were going to finally working everything through.

Bella and Rosalie made their way over to Emmett and me, huge grins on their faces.

"What just happened?" Emmett demanded.

"I stuck my nose in someone else's private business," Rosalie informed us, casting a smug glance Bella's way.

Bella rolled her eyes. "Yeah, yeah, whatever, "She muttered as she wrapped her arms around my waist.

"I don't know what you girls said or did, but thank you," I whispered as I kissed Bella's forehead.

"They deserve each other," She replied.

I grinned. "And what about those two?" I said pointedly as I lifted my chin in the direction of Emmett and Rosalie who were flirting outrageously with each other.

Bella chuckled. "Oh, she can handle him."

"I don't know," I teased. "Emmett is kind of a ladies man." I added, though I had never seen my friend react this way about a woman before. I hoped that he had finally found the woman he was so sure he would find one day. For his sake.

Bella just smiled as pulled my face down to hers. "Oh, I'm sure I can handle him." She said pointedly, telling me that if he hurt her friend there wouldn't be a place on earth he would be safe. I got the feeling that Rosalie thought that way about me.

"Your sexy when you dangerous," I whispered before finally pressing my lips to hers.

* * *

"What are you doing out here?" Rosalie asked as she walked out the front door.

I had been sitting here for the last hour thinking about everything that had happened today. Mainly I thought about Bella and Rosalie and how different Bella was around Rosalie.

"Nothing," I just mumbled as I rocked back and forth on the porch swing.

"Come on," She teased as she took the seat next to me. "Tell Auntie Rosalie all about it."

I sighed as I turned to her. "I was just thinking about how different Bella is around you."

She frowned. "What do you mean?"

"She's bright and fiery and so full of energy. She's different around you. Happy. I just thought that I had helped her come out of her shell. Compared to you..." I trailed off.

Rosalie surprised me by laughing. "Edward, Bella and I grew up together but we haven't been as close as we were today in a long time. You did that. You made her trust someone other than me, and old lady and a man in a psychiatric facility that sees his dead wife. Now she's here and she's got you and Alice and the guys. She's involved and she's happy and it's because of you. You should give yourself some credit for that."

"She isn't like she used to be, though. I had hoped but after seeing her today, I know she's not there yet."

"Edward, Bella will never be that girl again. She may act silly and laugh around me, but that's because I'm kind of the only family she has left. She doesn't have contact with her relatives and I don't have much with mine, so we've kind of stuck together."

She sat quietly for a while before speaking. "When it happened, Bella turned into someone that I didn't know. She didn't smile or laugh or joke around. Hell, she didn't even talk. I had lost my surrogate parents and brother and it felt like I was going to lose my sister. Her aunt shoved her in this place and she started to fade even more week by week. I'd go there every week and talk to her, act like she wasn't staring out the window as if she wasn't even there. She got better, though. She got out when I was in college and then she just drifted around the country." She shrugged her shoulders.

Rosalie sat back and rested her hands in her lap. "I want to kill that man, Edward. I want to find a way to kill him for taking everything she had away from her. He was a selfish, cold bastard who wanted to take the light he saw in Bella and watch it fade. Some people are like that, I guess. They want to see other people suffer because they take some sick pleasure out of it. I was angry for a long time, but then I focused on that I still had Bella."

I nodded in agreement. "She sure is something."

"She is. She'll never be the same, Edward. It's not possible, not after what she saw, after what happened to her. You can never get her to that place because she can't. Something that horrifying changes you. What you should focus on Edward is that Bella, after everything that she's been through, after everything that she closed herself off from, she chose you Edward. She chose you and she gave you her heart. I won't say it will be easy, she's got a long road to go and so do you, but if you hang in there, I promise you won't regret it."

I smiled at her. "I'm always going to hold on to her, Rosalie. I never understood how Jasper could wait for Alice all this time, but now that I have Bella, I know because I'd do the same."

Rosalie grinned as she got to her feet. "Good. That means I won't have to kick your ass."

A couple of hours later, I was leaving for work when Bella came stumbling out onto the front porch.

"Have a good day," Bella muttered as she winced away from the morning sun.

I looked at her, her hair was a mess, her eyes were sleepy and she was grumpy as hell. She was the most beautiful thing I'd ever seen.

"Come here," I murmured as I pulled over to the swing.

"What is it?" She asked as she dropped into the seat.

I knelt in front of her. "You're amazing, you know that?"

She smiled tiredly. "Oh, yeah. I'm hung over and I look like I belong in zombie movie. I'm a catch," she drawled.

"No, you are. You make me so happy, Bella. I didn't think that could be possible, but you do." I took a deep breath, trying to gather my courage. Bella frowned, sitting up straight.

"Edward, is everything alright? You're green," she commented.

I chuckled breathlessly. "Somehow, that doesn't surprise me. Bella, I love you. I thought I knew what love, what it was supposed to feel like. I was wrong. When I saw you in the library that day, I knew what love was. It was you. I want us to have a future together, Bella. I want forever."

Tears filled her eyes. "Edward, what are you saying?"

I smiled. "I'm saying, Bella, that I want you to be my wife. I want to grow old with and have babies with and make a family together. Bella, what's wrong?" I demanded.

She had gone from glowing, with tears of joy in her eyes, to looking like I had just slapped her. Her eyes were wide with pain and heartbreak and I didn't understand.

"Bella?"

She cleared her throat and pulled her hands from mine as she got to her feet. "I can't marry you, Edward."

I got to my feet. "What?" I demanded in disbelief. She had looked so happy. What had changed?

"I'm sorry; Edward, but I can't marry you. I don't want to." She forced out.

"Bella-" I began. She wasn't getting out of this.

"No, Edward. I don't want to marry you. My answer is no."

We stood there for a moment and I knew how she felt the other day in the library when I had shut her out because she had shut me out. It hurt.

"I think you should just go," She whispered.

"Bella, I'm not going to leave." I told her.

"Edward, I want you to leave."

I looked at her, begging her to let me, knowing she wouldn't. Not yet.

Sighing, I turned around and stormed over to my car. This wasn't over. I wasn't giving up on her. I wouldn't give up on us.

**A/N**** Hi! Hopefully you haven't taken stopped reading by now! All will be revealed, but I think it's pretty obvious what it is. Please review!**


	18. Chapter 18

**A/N**** Hi guys! Thanks for all the reviews and for those of you who have added this story. Here is the next chapter and I hope you like it!**

**RPOV**

I ran down the stairs and came to an abrupt halt at the bottom of the stairs and froze.

"Okay, what's wrong with this picture?" I mumbled to myself.

Bella, happy, in love, Bella was lying face down on the couch and sobbing her heart out. I noticed that the cats were pacing around her, stopping to rub their bodies against her, obviously distressed and trying to comfort her.

I rushed over and knelt on the floor beside her, running my fingers through her messy hair.

"What's wrong, sweetie?" I murmured.

"I think I just broke up with Edward." She hiccupped.

"What do you mean you think?" I demanded as I urged her to sit up and wrapped my arms around her.

"I told him to leave. I said I wouldn't marry him. I may not have had a ton of relationships in my life, but I'm pretty sure that means we broke up."

"No." I argued. I saw the way that they looked at each other, the love was almost palpable. "I don't understand. Was it too soon? I mean, I know you haven't been together that long."

She shook her head. "No, it was perfect," She smiled sadly. "I love Edward. I know I'll always love him. I didn't think I could open my heart to anyone, especially a man, but Edward... I couldn't help but love him with everything I am. When he proposed I was so happy. I wouldn't have guessed I would be. I woke up, hung over and just wanting to wallow in self-pity and he looked at me like I was the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen."

"Then why?!" I burst out. "If Edward proposing was a good thing, why did you say no? Jesus Christ, is there something in the water here that makes women destroy their own happiness?" I demanded.

Alice and Jasper, now Bella and Edward. I'd come here to get away from relationship drama and I'd found myself smack bang in the middle of an episode of One Tree Hill.

"He doesn't know," she whispered.

"What?" I asked. "What doesn't he know?"

"About me!" She burst out. "He doesn't know about me."

I blinked at her. "Honey, I'm trying here, but you're going to have to help me out." I told her.

She turned to scowl at me. "He doesn't know about me. He doesn't know that I'm infertile. He doesn't know that I cannot give him children," her voice broke.

"Bella," I whispered. "You need to talk to him." I told her. Something told me that Edward wouldn't give a damn, but I knew Bella enough to know that she wouldn't believe that. That it mattered to her.

Bella let her head fall back as she stared up at the ceiling. "Edward's a good man. He'd stay," she whispered. "He would pretend like it isn't a big deal, but it is. Edward was born to be a father." She frowned. "He's mentioned having children before, but that was before we were a couple. He said he wanted ten kids and a dog. And here I am, barren and with three cats," she muttered.

"Why didn't you tell him?" I asked gently. I knew that they had shared a lot of each other's demons, and while Bella hadn't told me what Edwards were, she respected his privacy too much for that, she had told me that she had shared hers.

Bella wiped away her tears with the back of her hand, which reminded me of her when she was younger. Bella was one of the only people I knew who looked adorable when she cried.

"I don't know. I just didn't think of it. I wasn't thinking about children or marriage, I was thinking about falling in love and what that meant. I think that maybe I also didn't want to think about it because I knew it would change things."

"It will only change things if you let them," I told her, willing her to see. "He probably already knows," I mused thinking about how the Swans story was splashed all over the press for months.

Bella shook her head. "He doesn't. The press was never told. My aunt doesn't even know." She looked at me with haunted eyes. "You're the only one I ever told."

I felt my heart break for her and at the same time I felt humbled. I was the only one she had ever shared this with.

"He was born to be a father, Rose. How can I ask him to give that up?" She asked in a whisper.

I sighed and ran my fingers through my hair. "Bella, isn't that up to him? Isn't that his decision to make? Besides, you can still have a family, there's surrogacy and fostering, adoption. So many children need loving homes. All because you're unable to get pregnant doesn't mean you can't have a family."

"I was in a psychiatric facility for two years, Rosalie," she pointed out. "It won't be as easy as that, that's even assuming they'll let me adopt a baby. And what if he doesn't want to adopt? Some men and even some women don't want to adopt baby. There's nothing wrong with that, it's their decision."

I frowned. She was right, some people didn't want to adopt children, and they wanted their own. I didn't think Edward was one of those people. I didn't think that because Bella couldn't have children that Edward would walk away. That wasn't love and Edward loved Bella more than anything. I could see that.

"Then he isn't the guy you should be with. If he is willing to walk away from you because you can't give him a biological child, then he isn't worth it. For the record, I think your selling him short. Edward loves you. He'd do anything for you. Give him the chance to prove you wrong."

Bella wiped her tears away. "I don't know. My heads all muddled up. I can't think straight."

"Then don't. Why don't you and I have a nice girly night?" I suggested brightly.

"Don't you have a date tonight?" She teased.

I tried to hold back a frown. Edward's friend Emmett had asked me out for a drink later and I wanted to go. He was sweet and funny and kind. I wanted to go, but I knew that Bella needed me and if Emmett was the man I thought he was, and then he'd understand.

"We can go another time. He'll understand."

"No," she shook her head. "You are going to get your ass upstairs and beautify yourself so that Emmett won't know what's hit him. I can take care of myself and if not I have three very protective cats," she joked.

"Are you sure? I don't mind, Bella."

"I am sure," she smiled. "I'll watch some chick flicks, eat ice cream and most likely get a little drunk and start singing. No one should have to witness my drunken singing."

I nodded reluctantly. Nothing I said to her would change anything. It was Edward who had to convince her and it was Bella who needed to find the courage to tell him. I just needed to be a supportive friend until they sorted things through.

**EPOV**

"Dude, your here!" Emmett cheered as I joined him in our regular booth in the diner.

"What's up?" I muttered. I wasn't exactly in the mood for a meeting with the guys, I didn't want to bite their heads off, but Emmett had insisted.

I still didn't understand what had gone wrong. I had asked her to marry me, to spend her life with me and she had asked me to leave. I didn't understand. I had expected shock, maybe even a polite rejection, but not to have her sending me packing.

I was frustrated and angry and upset and confused as hell, but I knew I was going to get to the bottom of this. Bella was who I wanted and I wasn't going to let this get in our way.

"It's him," Emmett growled as I took my seat.

Jasper sat next to him with a dreamy, satisfied smile on his face.

I frowned at him. "Jazz, you look strange. It's like you look exhausted, but your glowing at the same time," I muttered.

Jasper leaned forward to smile at me. "I haven't slept all night," he told me cheerfully. "I'm absolutely exhausted. Every muscle in my body is sore. It's amazing."

I frowned wondering what the hell he was talking about.

Emmett groaned at my confusion. "Jazzy and Alice got it on last night. He's had sex for the first time in almost a year and he's been away with the fairies ever since. I think I preferred him when he was miserable and sexually frustrated." Emmett groused.

Jasper just grinned and sat back in his chair with a contented sigh.

"I asked Bella to marry me and she said no and then asked me to leave." I blurted out.

My best friends looked at me with wide eyes and slack jaws. I guess that wasn't the most delicate way to break the news, but was there really a good way to say that my girlfriend rejected me?

"You asked her to marry you?" Emmett asked in disbelief. "Are you crazy? You've only been dating for a minute!"

"I don't care how long we've been together," I snapped. "I asked her to marry me because I love her and I want to spend the rest of my life with her. I don't think that's something that has a date."

"I agree with you, Edward. If Alice and I hadn't waited until after college before we even got engaged maybe Lauren would never have told those lies," Jasper shrugged his shoulders. "We would have been married and happy. We wouldn't have lost so much time. If I were you Edward, I'd get this fixed as soon as possible. You don't want to waste time. That's something both Alice and I regret."

"Oh god," Emmett muttered at Jaspers advice. "You want mine, Eddie? I say go over there, get the truth and move on. And I beg you to not walk around like this moron when she does agree to marry you."

"You think she will say yes?" I asked quietly. My confidence had taken a hit this morning and I didn't completely that she'd agree to marry me as easily as they seemed to think.

Jasper grinned. "She doesn't stand a chance."

A while later, I left the two bickering about a bet that Emmett had lost last night. He had bet Jasper a hundred dollars that he wouldn't last the entire night as soon as he did have sex again. Jasper very smugly pointed out that he had and then held out his hand for the money. Emmett had tried threatening to tell Alice, but Jasper had chuckled and asked what he thought the money was going on.

"Sorry!" A high voice all but shouted as a woman came crashing into me.

"It's alright, Tanya," I replied as I started to walk away.

"Wait," she called out, wrapping her delicate hand around my wrist.

I sighed inwardly. I really didn't need to hear whatever she had to say right now. Maybe that was unfair, but that was how I felt.

"What can I do for you?" I asked, smiling friendly down at her.

She brushed her strawberry curls away from her face and smiled seductively up at me. "I heard that Isabella Swan turned down your proposal. I'm sorry to hear that," she added with an apologetic smile.

I narrowed my eyes. Her smile was apologetic, but after years on the police force, I was good at reading people and her eyes negated what her smile was trying to come across as. She wasn't sorry.

"Wait, how do you know that?" I demanded.

She rolled her eyes. "Oh, I overheard Alice on the phone to that new blond chick that came to town," she replied breezily, but I heard the bite in her words when she spoke of Rosalie. Tanya had never liked competition and while she didn't see Bella as a threat, she obviously saw Rosalie as one.

"Small towns," I muttered underneath my breath. "Well, thanks for your concern, Tanya, but it's all a misunderstanding."

Her eyebrows shout up. "Really?" She asked casually. I wasn't fooled. "Well, that's good. I guess. Anyway, I was just going to say that if you needed someone to talk to, I'm always here. Whenever you need me," she added, brushing her hand against my arm.

"Tanya," I warned as I took a step back.

"Edward," she mocked. "I don't see what the big deal is about. I was only telling you that I'm here if you need me. Or want me," she added. She fluttered her eye lashed as she looked up at me with lust filled eyes.

I frowned. "Jesus Christ, Tanya. When are you going to get it through your head? I don't want you. I will never want you. I'm in a relationship with Bella and that isn't about to change anytime soon."

"Really? You see, I thought she told you she didn't want to marry you. I'd say that your relationship has just changed. Big time." She smiled gleefully at me.

I scowled at her. Had I ever really tried to spare her feelings? Had I ever thought that she deserved more than to just be a body to the men she took to bed? I very much doubted that Tanya would ever change.

"Whatever, Tanya, but know this, even if I was single, I would never want you. I'm not that desperate," I added as I turned and walked away from her and her furious glare.

I walked down the street and I didn't feel the guilt I had in the past when I had rejected Tanya. I just didn't care. She had to know that it was never going to happen. I wanted Bella. I loved Bella.

Now, all I had to do was wait until I finished work so I could go and tell her that and find out what the hell was going on in her head so we could move forward.

**RPOV**

I ran down the stairs and found Bella on the couch, singing her heart out to yet another sad love song. When she had spoken of sitting around the house watching movies and singing drunkenly to sad loves songs, I had assumed she was joking. I was wrong.

She sat on the couch in her Taylor Swift _Speak Now_ t-shirt and sweat pants, her hair was a mess and her eyes were puffy from the sporadic crying jags that she would burst into. She had _Need You Now_, by Lady Antebellum playing softly in the background and _Sex and the City_ on the television. She would sit there mumbling about Mr. Big leaving Carrie at the altar, only to pause and belt out the chorus. It would have been funny if it wasn't kind of pathetic.

"Honey, I'm leaving now." I told her carefully.

Instead of responding or even acknowledging I had spoken, Bella started to sing.

_"__It's a quarter after one, I'm a little drunk and I need you now  
Said I wouldn't call but I lost all control and I need you now  
And I don't know how I can do without  
I just need you now_

woah woaaah."

She finished weekly as she shoved another spoon on mint chocolate chip ice cream into her mouth.

"Okay..." I muttered as I turned and walked out of the house, shutting it tightly behind me.

I stopped dead in my tracks as Edward got out of his car and made his way toward me. "I knew I liked you, Cullen."

He just smirked up at me. "I don't think the woman in there will agree with you on that."

I chuckled. "I wouldn't be so sure if I were you. Good luck," I sang as I skipped past him.

I had a hot date to get to.

**BPOV**

Ben and Jerry were the two greatest men on the planet, I decided. They were comforting, sweet, always there when you needed them and came in a variety of flavours and sizes. What more did a girl really need?

I had been here most of the day in my comfort clothes eating, watching movies and singing my heart out to every sad country song I knew.

Rosalie had left for a date a moment ago and I was happy for her. She deserved someone like Emmett. I know he made jokes and could come off abrupt and even belligerent, but he had a good heart.

I faintly heard a knock at the front door as the song changed.

I frowned as I got to my feet and turned everything off. Not many people knocked my door and Rosalie had just left, Alice would be busy at work or with Jasper and Edward... Well, I doubted he'd ever knock my door again.

I was the bitch who threw his sweet, romantic, out of the blue proposal right back in his face. I doubted I'd be seeing him again anytime soon.

It was with that thought that the God's just wanted to prove me wrong. Standing there, with the sun setting behind him and wearing his Sheriffs uniform stood Edward.

I wanted to throw my arms around him and apologise and tell him how much I loved him, but I didn't know if he would want that. If I still could.

He stood there looking determined, but I could see the flicker of anger and hurt in his eyes and it killed me that I was the one who put that there.

"You never knock the door," I mumbled. I knew it was stupid and I should have given him something better than that, but was the only thing I could think to say.

"We need to talk about what happened, Bella," he replied firmly.

I felt my heart pound. I wasn't ready for this conversation. "We really don't."

HIs eyes darkened with anger. "So, let me get this straight, I propose to you, you say no and I don't deserve as to why?" He glared at me.

Fear made me do a stupid thing. Lie. "I just don't want to marry you. I don't see us with that kind of future." The words tasted like acid as I forced them out. I wanted to marry this man more than anything. He was kind and strong and he had the most beautiful soul.

The smile he gave was better described as a sneer. "You see when you told me you'd always love me, I thought that this direction was kind of a given," he bit out.

I blinked back the tears. "Look, Edward, I said no. You just have to accept that."

Suddenly, his eyes were soft and his smile was tired and sad, but kind. "Bella, baby, tell me what is going through that head of yours. Please." His voice was so soft, so tender, I almost broke down.

"I told you, Edward. I just don't see us heading in that direction."

He shocked me by smiling. "Yes, Bella, we are. We have been since the moment we met. Okay, you were a little unsure at first and we've had our moments, but it's been pretty smooth sailing. And you want to know what, Bella? Because I believe that when it's meant to be, it doesn't have to be difficult. It doesn't have to have love triangles and make ups and break ups. There doesn't have to be all that drama that you read about in those romance novels of yours." He chuckled. "I don't think that the falling in love part should have to be difficult. We'll have enough of that in the future, believe me. It doesn't have to have nonstop drama because some people meet, they fall in love and they stay in love because it's meant to be. We are meant to be."

I felt tears fill my eyes as I stood there, staring at him in shock. "I didn't think you listened when I rambled on about my romance novels," I whispered.

He just smiled that crooked smile that melted my heart. I couldn't help but soften toward him. To want to melt in his arms.

"So, you always thought you were heading in this direction?" I asked shyly.

He nodded. "Since the moment we met. I may not have realised it at the time, but it's true. Do you think I act this way will my ex-girlfriends?" he teased.

I rolled my eyes. "Do you think now is the best time to talk about your ex-girlfriends?"

He attempted to hide his laughter as he pulled me outside to sit on the porch swing, where we just sat quietly for a while and rocked back and forth.

"Baby, please just tell me why you said no, why you pushed me away. The truth, this time," he ordered when he sensed I was about to lie to him again.

I groaned as I looked into his eyes. Rosalie were right, I should give him the chance to prove me wrong. Edward was a good man and he loved me and he deserved better then how I treated him today. I just hoped that he did prove me wrong.

"Edward, don't you get it?" I demanded breathlessly.

"Get what?"

I took a deep breath and forced the words out. "Edward, if you marry me, you won't have a future. When James attacked me, he stabbed me in the lower abdomen. To save my life they had to remove my uterus. I can't have children. Which means that we couldn't have children. Call it clichéd but the image of sitting on the porch in my rocking chair as the grandchildren play in the front yard is something that I want. Some I know for damn sure that you want. With me, Edward, we have no future." I gasped out. "And you know what? It sucks! It sucks that I won't have babies with your eyes and my hair. It sucks!" I repeated. "And I know you, I know you'll say it doesn't matter, but it does and one says you'll realise that and you'll either want to leave or you'll end up resenting me for it. So, I can't say yes, Edward, even though I want to. I just can't because the thought of you not having children is unthinkable." I panted as I slumped back into my seat. I actually felt better for getting it all out. There were no more secrets, nothing left to say. It was all out.

When I finally gathered the courage to look up at him, he had the strangest look on his face. It was a cross between anger and laughter. Very _Jekyll and Hyde_.

"Bella, I love you, I do, but I could happily beat you to death right now."

I frowned. I hadn't expected that. "Honey, you say the sweetest things," I drawled, relying on my humour to give me time while I work things out.

He turned toward me, taking my hands in his. "Bella, I love you. I won't lie; it kills me that we can't have children together. That our children won't have your eyes or your smile, but it's not the be all and end all. I'll have you and we'll have each other. Yes, I could marry a woman who could give me biological children, but if she's not you, then it doesn't mean anything. I need you. You're everything to me. As long as we're together, we can make it work. We'll adopt," he shrugged his shoulders easily. "They might not have our good looks, but we'll screw them up in our own special way. Just like everyone else does with their children," he promised.

I looked into his eyes for the longest time, looking for a shadow of doubt in his eyes. Looking for something that told me that just maybe he didn't mean what he said. I didn't find any.

He wasn't just saying all this because he wanted to make me feel better. He knew everything and he still wanted me. He still loved me. Rosalie was right.

I felt the absolute relief wash over me. "If in ten years' time you change your mind, I swear to god that I will happily throw this back in your face." I warned him.

Edward just laughed and got to his knees. "Be nice this time," he teased. "Isabella Swan, I love you. I will always love you. I have searched for you my entire life and I am so glad that I finally found you. I promise that I will never let you go. Say that you will marry me and make me the happiest man alive. Let me love you for the rest of our lives and wherever we end up after that. Marry me, Bella, and be mine forever," he murmured.

Wow, was all I thought, followed by a thousand, mushy, romantic responses.

In the end, I went with the response that matter the most. The only response that ever matter.

"Yes."

**A/N**** Well, what did you think? Let me know!**


	19. Chapter 19

**A/N ****Hi guys! Sorry this is so late, but RL has been pretty busy lately. German Market, work, Christmas shopping, Christmas party, hangover from said party... Yes, it's been a pretty busy time. This chapter is basically the night of the engagement, nothing big, just a moment between Edward and Bella... I hope you enjoy it!**

**EPOV**

"Yes?" I whispered in disbelief against her hair.

"Yes!" She squealed as she planted a kiss on my mouth. "I'll marry you."

I laughed as I pulled her into my arms and swung her around, unable to contain my joy. She had finally said yes.

When Bella had informed me of her reasons for why she had rejected my proposal, my heart had broken for her and my hatred for James had consumed me. The bastard had taken her family away from her and had tried to take any family she would have in the future away from her, too.

While my heart ached for her, I'd also wanted to wring her neck. How could she doubt me? I loved her more than anything. Her, not her ability to give me biological children. If children happened for us then that would be wonderful, but if not, I was happy to just have her. More than happy.

I lowered my mouth to hers in a deep kiss, filled with passion and promise.

"Upstairs," Bella mumbled.

We crashed into the house, Bella pressed up tightly against me, my arms wrapped around her waist, pulling her all that closer.

I moved to kiss her neck hungrily, nipping teasingly as her skin, reveling in the sound of her breathless moans.

"Edward," she groaned.

"I know," I replied huskily as I ran my tongue against her skin.

"No!" She abruptly pushed me back, her eyes wide. "I'm going to be sick!" She hissed before wrenching herself out of my arms and dashing for the bathroom.

It took a second for me to connect the dots. Bella hadn't been groaning my name in pleasure, but in warning. She was sick.

I raced into the bathroom and found her on her knees, retching violently into the toilet.

"Bella," I murmured as crouched down beside her, trying to pull her long hair away from her face with one hand and rub soothing circles onto her back with the other. "Are you okay?"

"No," she groaned before heaving. "Go away!" She gasped out.

I knew that she must be embarrassed, most women were, but there was no way in hell I was leaving her alone when she was sick. "That's not going to happen," I replied gently, wincing in sympathy for her.

Eventually, when there was nothing left for her to bring back up, she slumped to the floor, drained. I got her a damp towel to cool her down and placed it on her burning forehead. "Better?"

Her response was to grunt as she closed her eyes, too tired to do anything else.

I laughed as I scooped her into my arms. "Come on, sicko, off to bed with you," I teased as I walked through the dark living room and carried her carefully up the stairs.

"What about our night of hot sex?" She mumbled without opening her eyes.

I looked down at her clammy skin, green pallor and the fact that she could barely hold her own head up. "Not tonight, honey. Don't worry we have the rest of our lives to have hot sex," I grinned, though she didn't open her eyes to see.

Bella smiled slightly; as if that was all she could manage. "Yeah, like we're going to be having sexy after the wedding."

"You bet your ass, we are. Lots and lots of sex." I chuckled as I maneuvered through her bedroom door and lay her gently on the bed.

"Do you have anything baggy?" I asked as I opened the closet door.

"Dresser," she mumbled.

I walked over to the dresser and opened the draw only to find it filled with my things. At least two of the drawers had shirts and pants that I had left here, forgetting to take them home. I couldn't help the grin when I realised that without any fuss or big drama, Bella had already started moving me into her house. "Not going in that direction, my ass," I muttered as I pulled out one of my t-shirts. It was my old grey t-shirt that I tended to go jogging in. It was loose and soft and it would be huge on her. It was perfect.

It took a lot of effort to get her out of her clothes and not let my mind wander to what we should have been doing right this moment. I should be licking my way down her stomach, not avoiding contact with the area because it was sensitive. I should be peeling the clothes of her sexy body so I could devour her, not cover her up with my shirt.

"You stay here," I ordered after I had carefully tucked her into bed. "I won't be long," I promised as I placed a kiss on her forehead before turning and heading back downstairs.

Downstairs, I cleaned up in the bathroom and walked around the house, locking everything up before heading into the kitchen and getting some things that I thought might make Bella feel a little better. After feeding the demon cats and turning off the lights, I headed upstairs to Bella.

"How did you get so sick all of a sudden," I asked as I closed the bedroom door.

Bella just glanced up at me with glazed eyes. "I was upset, Edward. Everyone knows that when a woman is upset she can eat anything shy of a decomposing horse and she'll be fine. It's when she feels better that she pays for it."

I felt my eyes widen. "Decomposing horse?" I asked, the thought making me a little queasy.

Bella rolled her eyes. "Men," she grumbled before noticing the stuff I had laid out on the bed. "What's all that?"

I grinned. "This is for you. We have water, to keep you hydrated, juice, for when you feel a little better and need some sugar. There's also crackers, a cold compress if you hit and a hot water bottle if you're cold."

The softest look came into her eyes as she smiled at me. "You've thought of everything, haven't you?"

I shrugged my shoulders. "It's my job to take care of you."

Bella just smiled as I stripped off my clothes as climbed into bed with her, pulling her gently into my arms.

"I'm sorry that I managed ruin tonight. I seem to be screwing up a lot today," she muttered.

"Hush," I whispered as I kissed her forehead. "Nobody's perfect, Bella. No one always makes the right decisions. It's what makes us human. I have messed up a lot in the past; I think I can forgive you for the one time you make the mistake. You should have trusted me," I whispered, unable to keep the hurt out of my voice.

"I'm sorry. I was just afraid, I guess. Afraid that if I did and you proved me wrong, that I wouldn't get over it. I hate James for he's done. He took my family and my future away from me all in one night. Why?" She whispered her voice full of pain that I could never grasp. "I was fifteen and nothing special. We dated for a while, but it wasn't like it was us against the world. Why would he do this to me?"

I lay there quietly as I tried to think of how to answer her. "I think you're wrong. I think that James knew how special you were. How special you are. Some people, Bella, they see that in others and they either want it for themselves or they want to destroy it. James was both. He had it, he had you, but he didn't treat you with care and love and he lost you. When that happened, I think his true color showed. His anger, his hatred and instead of taking the responsibility for what he had done, what he had lost, he blamed you. He wanted to blame you for his mistakes."

"It's my entire fault. I should have stayed away from him." She sounded so sad and alone, that I pulled her closer to me, to remind she wasn't.

"No it's not. Remember what you told me, about how it's not my fault for other people's actions. It was James who came into your house that night and murdered you family, tried to kill you. It was James who did that. Do you know how many break ups that happen when you're a teenager? How many girlfriends and boyfriends that you have at that age? They don't react to those break ups like James did. He's evil Bella, what he did that night proves that. He wanted to hurt you, not only physically, that would have been easy. He wanted to destroy your soul. Don't let him," I told her softly.

Bella was quiet for so long, I wondered whether she'd fallen asleep and I'd been talking to myself.

When she finally moved, she tipped her head to look up at me with tear drenched eyes. "Thank you for being you. Thank you for loving me as I am and showing me that not everyone is like him. For showing me that there are men in this world with good hearts and strong and kind souls."

I had to choke back the emotion at her words. They were so sincere and so full of love that my eyes burned with unshed tears. "Thank you for loving me." I answered her simply. "There are so many things that I want to thank you for, but that's what I am most grateful for, that you love me."

"I always will."

* * *

"I'm sorry I haven't got you a ring," I whispered a while later.

Bella now lay on her stomach, her fingers gently tracing patterns onto my stomach as she was lost in her own thoughts.

She laughed softly, her breath tickling my skin. "I take it the proposal was kind of a spare of the moment thing this morning, which I rejected, so I didn't expect a ring," she drawled. "I guess I can forgive you."

"What are you thinking about?" I asked when she hadn't spoken for a while, returning to whatever thoughts were preoccupying her.

"I'm just a little sad, that's all," she murmured.

I cupped her face in my hand and tipped her face so I could look into her dark eyes. They were filled with sadness. "Why?" I whispered.

She blinked away the tears that attempted to fall. "I just wish my mom was here. I wish all of my family were here, but especially her. She had been planning my wedding since I can remember. She'd pick up wedding magazines and show them to me," she chuckled. "Id roll my eyes and say 'Mom, I have years before I even think about getting married. You can start planning then.' She won't get to plan our wedding, though. She won't even be there. It's just sad."

My heart broke for her. I could never conceive of what she went through, I had never lost anyone. I had been to one funeral in my life and that was a grandparent that I barely knew and I wasn't sad, or afraid, and I didn't feel like I'd lost anyone. Bella lost all of her family in one night. While tonight was a happy occasion, Bella would feel the absence of her family.

I decided that I would tell my family by myself, I didn't think Bella needed to be around my screaming mother and happy father when she was so raw the fact that her family wasn't there. That they wouldn't attend our wedding, her mother wouldn't help plan, her father wouldn't walk her down the aisle, and her brother wouldn't give an embarrassing speech before drunkenly warning me to kill me if I hurt his little sister.

"I'm so sorry, baby," I murmured as I kissed her forehead. "If you'd like we could just drive to Vegas and have Elvis perform the ceremony," I suggested with a grin.

She chuckled. "No. I want to marry you. If Vegas is what we both wanted then that would be fine, but I don't think it is. I want to stand there with our friends and your family and tell them just how much I love you."

I had to swallow back the emotion that rose at her softly spoken words. I didn't know what I did to deserve her, but I knew I would never do anything to mess it up.

"Our family," I corrected her gently.

"Our family," She agreed. "That's the good thing about all of this. My mom saw Esme as a sister. I used to refer to her as Aunt Esme when I don't think I could remember meeting her. I called your Dad Uncle Carlisle. Does that make you my cousin?" She teased.

I cringed. "No. It may not be illegal but it's still wrong in so many ways."

I felt her silent laughter, her breath tickling my skin and couldn't help but join her. "Do you think that if we had met when we were younger we would be where we are now?"

I looked down at her, her big beautiful eyes, her warm smile, her hair that was softer than silk and beneath all of her beauty a heart that was bigger than anyone else's. "Yes, we would have. I don't have a single doubt about that, Bella."

I felt her smile. "Neither do I."

* * *

"Tell me about them, your family," I murmured.

She was quiet for a long time as she gathered her thoughts. "My mom was like sunshine. Bright and beautiful and sometimes a little but too much," she chuckled. "She could talk faster than Alice and she'd always be flittering around doing something. She had this ongoing war with our neighbor from across the street and would go out of her way to drive her insane. At Christmas she'd get out her albums and play Christmas songs as we decorated the house. She loved that time of year," she whispered. "My dad, he was what I always thought was the stereotype of a man. He was strong, and tall and quiet. He used to tell us that our mom talked enough for the two of them."

"He sounds like a good man," I told her, remembering all the stories my mother had told me of Charlie Swan. How he had come from nothing and made a name for himself, was successful, but still came home at night for dinner with his wife and children.

"He was. If we ever needed anything, whether it was something stupid for our bike or advice on what to do if we'd gotten into a fight at school, he was there. He never yelled or got angry in front of us. He must have wanted to," she laughed. "We were our mother's children and had an opinion on everything."

"I notice that you don't talk about him as much. Andrew," I added quietly, not wanting to upset her by pointing it out.

"I know," she answered sadly. "It's hard to talk about him. He was my brother, my protector. He was the one Id drag downstairs at midnight if I was hungry, but too scared to go downstairs alone. He was the one who Id sneak into bed with if I'd watch a scary movie and I'd feel safe. He died in my arms," she added in a whisper. "Sometimes, it's harder to talk about him because I had never imagined my life without him. As you grow older you realize that one day your parents will die and the thought of it takes all the oxygen out of the room. You can't breathe and you break out into this cold sweat because one day your parents will be gone and you want have them. I never thought about Andrew being gone. I never thought about being without him. Does that make me evil? That I had come to terms with losing my parents, but not my brother?"

I pulled her closer to me. "No. I don't think that. I used to have that feeling. I was twelve, I think, when it came to me that my parents would die one day. It scared the shit out of me," I chuckled. "I didn't have any brothers or sisters, but I had my friends. One day, Emmett was in a car accident and he went into surgery and I remember being overcome with terror at the thought of him not waking up. Looking back now, I know that he was fine, but then... The thought of losing my best friend, my brother, was the scariest thing."

"I think it's because some people seem invincible to you. Andrew was like that to me. He was my brother and he would always be there and then one day, he wasn't."

"Do you think they would have liked me?" I asked teasingly, trying to lighten to mood.

Bella chuckled. "My mom would have. My dad and brother would have hated you. They always used to say that no one would ever be good enough for me." She said smugly.

I rolled my eyes. "I bet they would have liked me. I bet they're looking down right now and congratulating you on finding me." I told her cockily, frowning when she didn't reply. "What is it?"

"Do you really believe that? That somewhere, my family is looking down on me?"

"I do. I have to believe that because after some of the things that I have seen, I just don't think I could handle it if I didn't. I need to believe that our spirits, or souls, that they go someplace better when we die."

"I don't know if I believe," she whispered. "I want to. I want to believe that my family are in heaven, looking down on me, but I'm afraid. Afraid that I could be wrong."

"It's only natural to have doubts, Bella." I replied, holding her to me.

"I asked my dad once, about dying and about where we went afterward. I thought it was so cruel, that after years of living and being a person with thoughts and feelings, that one day we just died. I asked him, what the point of living was if we were just going to die in the end. He smiled the corners of his eyes crinkling and told me that the point is to live. I worried then about if I didn't live right. That I wouldn't do great and important things in my life. He said that it didn't matter whether I went sky diving or read a good book in front of the fire. If it made me happy, if I enjoyed it, then I was living. I asked him what he enjoyed. You want to know what he said. My big time, important lawyer father said it was us. That he used to worry about life and time and living it to the fullest and then he met my mom and he knew that time didn't matter. He didn't care if he only got twenty years or thirty because he met someone who made it worth. That made it wonderful."

"Your dad sounds like a good man," I whispered.

"He was." She answered quietly before turning to look into my eyes in the darkness. "You make it worth it, Edward."

I felt love wash over me at her words, at her meaning. Her father had told her that her mother had made life, no matter how short, worth living. She was saying that I made it worth it.

"As do you, my love." I answered as I leaned to place a tender kiss to her lips, losing myself in all that was Bella.

After a while Bella fell asleep in my arms and I couldn't help but follow. I was drained after the events of the past couple of days.

It wasn't too long before I woke up to hear the heart wrenching sounds of Bella's sobs as she relieved her worst nightmares all over again.

"No! Please!" She sobbed.

Heart sore for her and exhausted, instead of giving her space like I would normally, I acted instinctively and pulled her into my arms.

"It's okay, sweetie. I'm here. Everything's going to be okay," I whispered as I rocked her back as forth.

I braced when her hand reached out, expecting a blow and cursing myself for being stupid and not giving her the space she told me she needed. I knew that it would upset her if she struck out at me and was already thinking about what my reply would be when her hand came into contact with me.

What shocked me though, was that her touch wasn't a blow, it wasn't a strike to keep me away from her, it was a caress. Her fingers skimmed my face, tracing the line of my jaw as she did when she was awake.

"Edward," she mumbled in her sleep and wrapped her arms tightly around me.

I didn't try to hold back the tears that came to my eyes, I didn't care that they were there. Bella had recognized me, even in her dreams. She trusted me. She held onto me.

"I'm here, baby. I always be."

**JPOV**

I sat there in the darkness, looking up at the small house. She was inside. Isabella.

Eight years I had waited, watched from the shadows. It had brought me satisfaction to know that her life was as empty and as cold as my own. It should be. Isabella had ruined my life. She had made me love her and then tore herself away from me. Bitch.

That night so long ago, she'd had to pay. She had taken everything from me, so it was only right that I took everything away from her. And I had. My only regret was not knowing she would survive until it was too late. I'd had to come up with a plan, fast.

Isabella was the reason why my life was ruined. She fucked everything up. I'd had to watch my mother cry for me. To demand answers from the God she believed in so much. She hadn't been able to take it. She hadn't been able to take the grief, the sorrow, and in the end had taken her own life.

It was Isabella's fault. It was her fault that I had done what I did that night, I'd had to teach her a lesson. It was her fault that I'd had to hide away like a coward in the shadows. It was her fault that my mother was dead.

I had been to stand back and watch as Isabella floated through her life, alone and afraid. I had liked it. I liked hearing her wake up screaming night after night.

Only now her screams weren't as frequent and she was no longer alone.

Over the past eight years, I had kept track of the little bitch. I had especially enjoyed the years she had spent in the asylum. I would track her down and watch her, reveling in the knowledge that she had no idea who was watching her from the shadows. In the knowledge that she thought she was safe from me. She would never be safe from me.

I had been able to leave her in her misery until I arrived a week ago and realised that she was moving on. That she had a job, friends and a fucking boyfriend. Fiancé, I sneered the correction in my head. She was engaged. I was out there, alone, and she was fucking the local Sheriff.

I wouldn't let this continue. Isabella had taken everything from me. She had taken my life, my future. She had no right to have a future of her own.

I wouldn't allow it.

**A/N**** Thoughts?**


	20. Chapter 20

**A/N Hi guys! It is so awesome to read all of your reviews and those of you who have branded me evil for lying to them. It's fun! Please read below and leave reviews since they are awesome and make me smile!**

**P.S ****To the Guest who wondered about why Bella stayed in Sugar Grove when she could have moved, this was where her mother grew up and where she wants to feel closer to her. It's kind of a good job she did or I'd have no story, lol!**

**EPOV**

"Hello? Anyone home?" I called out as I entered the big house where I grew up.

"In the kitchen, sweetie," my mom called back and I couldn't help but smile. Since I could remember, my mother always replied that she was in the kitchen, whether she was cooking, cleaning or attempting one of her word jumbles, it was always in the kitchen.

She sat at the kitchen table, crouched over her word jumble book, scowling down at the paper. "Stupid thing," she growled as she angrily erased whatever word she had gotten wrong this time.

"What was the word?" I chuckled as I grabbed a bottle of water out of the fridge.

"I don't know, that's the problem," she snapped. "Stupid, stupid, stupid thing. Why would they make a word so difficult that you can't do it?"

I bit the inside of my cheek to hold back my laughter that I knew could be the end of my life. My mother was soft and sweet and wonderful until it came to the word jumble that she could never finish.

I peered over her shoulder and muttered. "Sacrilegious."

Her head whipped around to glare at me. "Get away from me," she growled and I held my hands up in surrender as I backed away from her, laughing when she turned back and grudgingly wrote it down before moving onto her next word.

"What are you doing here anyway?" She muttered without looking up from her jumble. "You practically live at Bella's," she continued, her face scrunched up in concentration.

"I just got off work for the night and I thought I'd come and see my loving mother. Have you seen her by any chance?" I teased.

"Ha ha ha, you're hilarious," she drawled. "Your loving, beautiful mother is right in front of you and your father is in the study pretending to read a book when really he's watching whatever game is on the sports channel at the moment."

"Well, can you put the pen down, I need to talk to you about something," I told her eagerly.

The pen dropped to the table and she looked up at me with concern in her eyes. "Carlisle!" She shouted. "What's wrong?"

I chuckled. "Nothing's wrong, I just need to talk to you and dad. Don't worry," I drawled.

"What's the matter?" My dad demanded as he rushed in the room, breathless.

"Nothing's wrong, dad. Sit down before you fall down," I told him. My dad's face was flushed after the run from the study and into the kitchen.

He scowled at my mother as he dropped into the chair across from her. "Can you not do that?"

My mom just rolled her eyes as she turned back to me. "Tell what's wrong."

"Jesus, nothing's wrong!" I groaned and then rolled my eyes when the front door opened. "Who is that?" I demanded.

"That's Emmett and Jasper, dear. You know, your oldest and dearest friends," she pointed out like I was mentally retarded.

"Great," I muttered. It's not that I minded my best friends just dropping by, but this was a special moment and I had hoped it to be just between me and my parents.

"Hey, Cullen family!" Emmett greeted as not only he and Jasper but Alice and Rosalie joined us in the kitchen.

I sighed as I leaned against the kitchen sink as everyone greeted each other and tried not to scowl petulantly at them all. Emmett had brought Rosalie over to meet my parents, who seemed to be delighted that Emmett was finally interested in a woman enough that he would introduce her to them. My mom had been trying to get all three of her 'boys' settled down since college and was ecstatic that it finally seemed to be happening.

My mom was the first to realise my irritation. "I'm sorry, sweetie, you were saying?"

I took a deep breath and smiled. "I was going to tell you that I proposed to Bella. And she said yes," I added when they all stood there, staring at me like I'd just announced I was becoming a cross dresser and changing my name to Emily.

"She said yes," my mom whispered as her eyes filled with tears and the brightest smile lit her face.

"She said yes," I replied with a grin.

"Oh my god!" She screamed as she jumped out of her chair and threw herself into my arms. "You're getting married!"

After squeezing the life out of me, she ran over to Alice where they started to do that thing that Bella and Rosalie had done, clasping hands and jumping up and down and squealing. Rosalie came over and gave me a warm hug.

"Bella told me earlier. Congratulations, Cullen," she grinned before joining my mother and Alice in their celebration.

Emmett and Jasper were next. Jasper grinned as he pulled me into a hug and slapped my back. "Congratulations, man."

"Thank you."

Emmett looked like he was going to pass out. "You're getting married?" He demanded.

I laughed at his tone. "Yes, Emmett, I'm getting married. I found the woman of my dreams and I'm not about to be an idiot and lose her."

He ran his fingers through his hair. "Look, it's not like I'm not happy for you, it's just going to take some time, you know?"

I grinned at one of my oldest friends. "I know."

"Edward," My dad spoke softly as he pulled me into a tight embrace. "I am so happy for the two of you."

"Thank you, dad," I replied, holding him tightly to me. One of the things that I had learned since meeting Bella was to never take my family for granted. "I only hope that I'm half as good of a husband as you are."

He pulled back, his eyes filled with pride and love. "You will."

"Where's Bella?" My mom demanded as my dad wrapped his arm over her shoulder.

I shrugged my shoulders. "It's hard for her. She misses her family and I didn't think she needed to see this," I said gesturing to the two of them. They were both so happy and so filled with joy and love, it would have only made her wish all the more that she could see her family like this.

"Oh," my mom said, her voice filled with understanding and compassion. "So, is she expecting you back soon?"

"She knows I was heading here to announce the good news after I got off work. She told me to take my time and have fun," I smiled at the memory of this morning, waking up in her arms, knowing that I would do that for the rest of our lives.

"Good, I want to give you something."

* * *

"Mom, I can't accept that," I protested as she handed me the small jewellery box.

She frowned at me. "Why? Have you already gotten Bella a ring?" She demanded.

"No, I was going to let her pick something out. What?" I snapped when she rolled her eyes.

"I don't care what some people say, there is nothing romantic about picking out your own engagement ring. Part of the romance of a proposal is the thought that the man who is on bended knee in front of you has gone out and chosen a ring that is beautiful and symbolizes his love for you."

It was my turn to roll my eyes. "Men don't think that way, mom."

She grinned up at me. "This is why my family have got that covered. As much as the romance of being proposed to is the image of the man we love scouring store after store in search of the ring that not only symbolizes our love but shows that this ring, this small but extremely significant ring, reflects who we are as a person."

"A ring is supposed to be all of that?" I asked sarcastically. I had worried enough about rings without knowing that women saw it not only as a piece of jewellery but also a symbol of what our love was and who they were.

"Anyway," she said pointedly. "The women of my family realised that men, as wonderful as they are, didn't quite understand this."

"That's shocking." I interrupted, grinning when she gave me a deadpan stare. "Sorry."

"So, we started a kind of tradition around the 1920's when one of my great aunts died soon after she was married, leaving this ring to her sister, who had thought it was beautiful. Ever since then we have kind of passed it on. Your great grandmother gave it to your grandmother when she was engaged and she then gave it to me when I had gotten engaged. And now, my dear sweet boy, I would like for you to give it to Bella and carry on our tradition."

I smiled as I looked at the ring in the small box. The face was a long oval, set with slanting rows of glittering round stones. The band was gold — delicate and narrow. The gold made a fragile web around the diamonds

"It's beautiful," I murmured, picturing it on Bella's delicate fingers.

"Of course it is. My family has always had exquisite taste in jewellery and in their spouses. You have proved that with Bella."

"I'm going to make her happy," I vowed, more to myself than her.

"I know."

**BPOV**

"Hello?" I greeted as I lay on my bed.

"Hey, baby, what you doing?" I heard Edward sexy voice drawl down the phone.

"Oh, hi handsome!" I all but squealed. I hadn't seen him all day and I had missed him. I missed his strong arms and masculine body. I missed his crooked smile and sexy laugh.

I heard him chuckle. "Well, hello beautiful."

"So, did you tell them?" I asked brightly.

"Yes, they are over the moon." I could hear the smile in his voice, the warmth.

"That's good," I replied quietly. I felt terrible for not going with him to announce our engagement to his family.

"Bella," he sighed.

"What?" I frowned as I sat up and leaned against my headboard.

"I know you and I know that tone. Stop feeling guilty about it." He ordered gently.

I couldn't help but smile. Of course he'd know what I was thinking. "I just feel like I should have been there, I just couldn't," I muttered, hoping he'd understand what I meant. I wanted to be there, to see Esme's joy and Carlisle's pride, but it just made it all the more evident that I would never see my parents reactions. I would never be able to jump around the room squealing while my dad gave Edward 'The talk'. I felt a pang in my chest at the image that played in my mind.

"Baby," he said tenderly. "I understand. My parents understand. They're really happy for us, by the way," he added cheerfully.

"Good," I answered sincerely.

"So, what are you doing?" He asked again, obviously trying to change the subject. What did I ever do to deserve him?

"I'm just laying here on this big bed all by myself, waiting for you," I added seductively.

"Give me five minutes," he replied, making me giggle like a teenage girl.

"No, you hang out with your family for a little longer," I laughed as I got off the bed with a groan when I saw the rain pounded against the bedroom window. "Whether is delightful, I see."

"Oh, it's wonderful. Dark, dreary and wet. Who needs sunshine and warmth, right?" He chuckled. "It is pretty bad out, though. Do you want me to come back?" He offered.

I rolled my eyes I looked out my window into the rainy night. "Yeah, because I'm just the little woman who needs a big strong man to hold me because of a little rain."

"You are sexy when you're sarcastic. Turns me on." He drawled.

"What turns you on, Edward?"

My jaw dropped. "Isn't your mom?" I asked, trying to hold back laughter as he stuttered over the phone.

"Mom, I, I didn't, um, see you there. Shut up, Bella," he hissed down the phone as I chuckled.

"I bet you didn't, sweetie. Now, as much as I love to hear what makes my only son sexually excited, I'm betting that's my future daughter on the phone and I'd really like to speak to her."

"Did your mom just say sexually excited?" I gasped out, leaning against the wall for support. "That's so wrong."

"You just wait, Swan," he growled as he passed me over to Esme.

"Bella?" Her soft voice was full of amusement at Edward's expense.

"Hi Esme!" I greeted her cheerfully.

"You can leave now, Edward." I heard her dismiss her only child and couldn't help but smile at the slam of the door that said she was alone.

"That was cruel," I reprimanded her gently.

"I know," she agreed cheerfully. "So, Edward told us the news. I am so happy, Bella!" She all but squealed.

"I am too, Esme. I am so happy. Edward is so amazing and he makes me so happy. I love your son more than I thought it was possible to love anyone."

"I know you do, Bella. I know how happy you make him and how much you love him. I am so glad that he found such a wonderful, sweet, amazing woman like you. It's every mothers wish to have their children happy and with someone who will love them almost as much as they do."

"I know," I murmured sadly.

"Your mom would be so happy for you, Bella. I know she was looking forward to this day and how sad you must be that she isn't here, but she is. She loves you and she is with you."

"You think so?" I asked, my voice quivering with emotion.

Esme chuckled. "Renee was my best friend, I knew her better than almost anyone. She is with you. Your father and your brother are with you. I know some people don't believe in that stuff but I have to believe. Someone as bright and as beautiful and as stubborn as your mother wouldn't let death stand in her way of seeing her daughter getting married."

I smiled as I followed the path of a rain drop with my index finger. Her words and they made me feel better. She was right. My mom was bright and wonderful, but could be as stubborn as any mule when she wanted to be. For the first time, I believed she would be there, that they all would.

"Thank you, Esme," I whispered sincerely. "You know, I think I was feeling a little guilty. Like by marrying Edward and being a part of your family then I'd be leaving my family behind, but I was wrong. You were like a sister to my mom. Closer, even, I'd say. I don't feel that by becoming part of your family that I'm leaving mine behind."

"Of course you're not. By becoming our daughter, Bella, you're not betraying your mother. You are gaining family, not losing it."

"I know." And I did. I wasn't replacing my mom and dad with Esme and Carlisle. I knew that now.

"So, stop feeling guilty about that, and about not being here, we understand. And we're here for you," she added softly.

"Thank you, Esme."

"You're welcome, honey. Now, I'm going to give you back to my son, who I can hear pacing outside the door, muttering about nosy mothers. I'll see you later, sweetie."

"Hey, baby, I'm back," he drawled.

"Stop blushing yet?" I teased as I made my way out of my bedroom and slowly down the stairs.

"You're hilarious," he muttered. "I'm just checking the hallway... And we're safe. My mother and her bat-like ears is now torturing my dad or Emmett and Jasper. So, what are you wearing?" He whispered seductively. I could hear him drop down onto a chair.

I couldn't help the smile that spread across my face. "I'm wearing that little black teddy that I showed you last week. You know that one that so sheer that you can see the faint birthmark that I have on my hip."

"I remember that one," he muttered breathlessly and I couldn't help but laugh as I looked down at what I was actually wearing, Edward's old grey t-shirt and girl boxers. Sexy.

"Yes, I'm just here, wearing my teddy and thinking of you. Waiting all along and wishing you were here," I flirted shamelessly.

"Give me five minutes and I can be there. I'm the Sheriff of this town, you know? I can put those flashing lights on my car and be there within two if you want."

I burst out laughing at his hopeful tone. "No. I think I can wait a little long for my big, strong man to come home," I teased.

He just laughed at me. "Fine. I'm giving them one more hour and then I'll be home. I want you and that teddy of yours to be waiting for me when I get back."

"Yes sir," I replied.

"Okay, I'll see you soon. I love you."

I felt my heart soar at his words. "I love you, too. Hey, Edward?"

"Yeah, baby?"

"I like it when you say that you'll be home," I told him shyly.

He paused for a moment and when he spoke I could hear the smile, the love, in his voice. "I like it, too. I'll see you soon."

"Bye," I whispered as I hung up with a huge smile.

I stood there at the bottom of the stairs and I felt it. I felt that everything would be alright. I could see myself and Edward and our wonderful future with our friends and our family. Because it was my family now. I wasn't alone anymore. I had my best friend sleeping in the next room, I'd gained another best friend who made our group complete. I had two guys who reminded me of my brother and I knew I would come to see them as brothers in the future. I had Esme and Carlisle who would bring me into their family and love me and protect me as they would if I were their actual daughter. Which, to them, I was now.

And most importantly, I had Edward. Edward, who loved me enough to have _Gilmore Girl _marathons and tolerate my devil cats, who didn't mind my demons, who encouraged me to face them. I had a man who didn't care that I could never give him children because he had me and that was enough for him. More than enough.

I was happy, truly happy for the first time in so long and it was all thanks to this one man.

It was then in my blissful state that I heard a familiar creak of the floor boards.

One of the things I had always liked about the house was that the floor boards creaked at the top of the stairs. It had seemed like a free alarm system. It had once been strange to hear them creak from downstairs when Edward had first arrived in my life, but after time I had gotten used to it. Even liked the sound.

Only now, the hairs on the back of my neck rose and my heart pounded in my chest. I was the only one in the house.

I closed my eyes for a second and tried to slow my breathing. I was hearing things, freaking myself out. I'd seen on too many horror movies and now my imagination was coming back to bite me on the ass.

Just turn around, I ordered myself, promising myself that no one would be there. That the only people in this house were me and three cats that were currently snuggled up on my bed.

Gathering my courage, I turned and felt my heart stop.

Standing at the top of the stairs was the creature from my worst nightmares.

Tall and lean with sandy hair, blue eyes and a killer smile. The monster in front of me had aged; he was no longer a boy, but a man. A man that sent terror through my body to my very soul.

This couldn't be happening. He was dead.

"James," I whispered.

I saw that smile spread across his face, I saw the unhinged look in his eyes.

"Hi Izzy. It's time to play a game."

**A/N Please don't hate me! I will be updating soon, but pretty busy day tomorrow, so it should be Sunday or Monday. Please leave reviews!**


	21. Chapter 21

**A/N ****Hi! So, however many moons ago, I was watching **_**Shrooms**_** when I tried to write my very own scary scene. All that came into mind was a young girl in a secluded house, with a man that had done something to hurt her in the past, in the house and looking to kill her. It started out with him under the bed, watching her walk by, but then I freaked myself out, lol. So, I came out with this idea and basically wrote the story around it. The characters, the back story, everything was created after this. A few things have changed since then, but the chapter started it all. I really hope you enjoy the next chapter and please let me know your thoughts!**

**EPOV**

I smiled as I hung up the phone and headed back into the kitchen to where everyone had gathered. My mom, Alice and Rosalie were gathered around the computer, discussing styles of dresses that I couldn't understand if I even tried, and what season they should look for. They were already planning their looks for a wedding that Bella and I hadn't even discussed yet. If it were up to me Bella and I would be in Vegas within hours and married. Something told me the women wouldn't agree with me.

Emmett and Jasper looked bored as hell as Alice and Rosalie turned to them, deciding which suit would go best with their hair and skin tones. Poor guys.

"Where's dad?" I asked with a frown as I took a seat next to Jasper, smiling in gratitude when he handed me a beer.

My mom glanced absently at me before turning back to the computer screen. "He was called into the hospital for some emergency, I wasn't really paying attention."

"No, she was too engrossed in a discussion over which season would be better to have your wedding in, spring or summer. Riveting, right?" Emmett drawled and then smiled innocently at the women when they lifted their heads to glare at him in unison.

"So, how is Bella?" Rosalie asked, stealing Emmett's beer and taking a healthy sip.

"She's great," I answered casually, trying not to picture Bella in that sexy black teddy that made all my blood rush from my head and straight to my groin. The last thing I needed was the erection from hell in front of my mother.

"Really?" Rosalie asked with raised eye brows.

"Really," I answered her as I shifted uncomfortably in my chair. It was as if she knew. As if she sensed how uncomfortable I was.

"Are you sure about this, dude?" Emmett demanded.

"Am I sure about marrying the woman I love? Pretty sure," I added sarcastically, absently resting my hand on the small jewelry box in my pocket.

Emmett shook his head and took a long pull of her beer. "This is all just moving so fast. I mean, Jazz, I expected to get hitched as soon as he talked this one around."

"Hey!" Alice protested. "I was the one who went to him. He didn't talk me around jack."

Jasper just smirked at her across the table.

"Anyway, I just think that you haven't thought this through. I love Bella, she's wonderful, but I think it's just a little too soon for you to be joining the old and boring club."

"Emmett," my mom scolded him as Rosalie giggled at him.

"What?" he demanded.

"Emmett, listen to me." I ordered. "I love, Bella. I want to spend the rest of my life with her and I'm not going to give her a chance in hell to realize that she's way out of my league." I grinned.

Jasper grinned. "Think of it this way, Em, if Edward's gets married, then he'll need a bachelor party."

It was as if a light bulb had switched over Emmett's head. He sat up with a devilish grin. "This is going to be good."

I rolled my eyes as I glanced at the clock. Soon I was going home to Bella and that sexy black teddy of hers. The next hour couldn't pass quickly enough.

**BPOV**

"I wouldn't do that if I were you, Izzy," James drawled when I bolted for the door. I flinched at his nickname for me, one I had always detested.

Slowly, I turned back to face him, my worst nightmare. He stood there, leaning against the wall like he didn't have a care in the world. Like he hadn't ruthlessly murdered my family for no reason eight years ago.

"This isn't happening," I breathed. I could feel my entire body trembling at the sight of him as I repeated the words over and over again in my mind. For weeks after that horrific night I had seen him everywhere. He was there when I closed my eyes; he was there in every shadow every window. I heard his voice whispering, laughing in my head constantly. This had to be that. I had to have had some sort of mental relapse. He couldn't be here. He couldn't be alive.

His smile was slow and cold and it scared the life out of me. His eyes were empty, like he wasn't even in there. He scared me more now than he had that night.

He had been furious eight years ago, so overcome with rage and hatred, but now he was so emotionless. Something told me he was more dangerous now than ever.

"Oh, this is happening, Izzy. I have waited eight _long _years for this night."

I glanced at the clock. Edward wouldn't be home for an hour. No one was around; no one could hear my cry for help. No one could help. I was all alone with the man who had killed my family and tried to kill me.

I had often dreamed of this moment, what I would do, how I would make him pay. A part of me found it funny that in all of my dreams I had wanted to fight, wanted to hurt him and now all I wanted was to flee. I didn't want to be here. I didn't want to face him. I wanted to turn back the clock to when he was just a bad nightmare.

"You seem surprised to see me," he commented as he pushed himself off the wall and casually walked up to me, acting as if he didn't see me backing away, desperate to put some distance between us. "Phone," he ordered with his hand held out.

I gritted my teeth, refusing to give him my lifesaver. All I had to do was call Edward and he'd be here within minutes. If I gave him my phone, I didn't have a chance in hell.

"Phone," he repeated, an edge coming into his voice. I watched in horror as he pulled a long knife with a double edged blade at the point out of his jacket pocket. I knew that knife. It was a bowie knife, traditionally used for hunting. It wasn't hunting that I recognized the knife from. I recognized it from that dark night eight years ago when he used a knife much like that to kill my family and almost kill me.

I handed him over my phone, trying not to touch his skin. I didn't ever want to touch him again. It was only fear of knowing what that knife could bring that had me handing it over. I knew what it felt like when the blade cut through the flesh, how the pain was unbearable.

I flinched when he dropped my phone to the floor and then stomped on it, crushing any hope I had of calling for help when he did the same to my house phone. I was alone.

"How?" I muttered, unable to get my question out. I didn't even know why I was asking, how I could ask. I just knew that he was meant to be dead. I had thought I was safe of this monster.

He grinned before he answered me calmly, smoothly. "Well, you didn't think I would let this go, did you? Please tell me that you didn't think that I'd throw myself off a cliff in a blaze of glory?" He walked right up to me, reaching out to play with a lock of my hair, ignoring my flinch. "You can't me that stupid," he whispered.

"Why are you doing this? Why come back after all this time?" I breathed, shrinking back into the wall.

I jumped at his loud cackle. "Come back? I have never left, Izzy. I have been with you for eight years. I sat outside that mental hospital, watching as you rocked back and forth. I watched as you moved from town to town, never knowing anyone and yet them always knowing you. Know that you were a freak. A bitch," he snapped out. "I have always been there."

I felt my eyes widen in horror. I looked into his cold eyes and knew that even though he was deranged he was telling the truth. He had watched me for eight years. I had never escaped him.

"Then why now? Why are you here now?" I demanded, my voice clearer, stronger. I felt anger rise in me at his words.

"Because of Sheriff Cullen, of course," he answered easily.

All my previous anger drained out of me at the mention of Edwards's name. He knew about Edward. I immediately felt panic rise and threaten to choke me until I forced myself to breathe. Edward was fine; I'd spoken to him only moments before. He was safe.

"Why?" I demanded.

I saw the first flicker or anger darken his eyes. "You know, Izzy, I was happy to sit back and watch you before. I would go my own way, get a job, get a beer, fuck a few women and then, then you'd move again and I got to find you again. Track you down. You will never know how much I enjoyed our little game of cat mouse," he whispered as he trailed his fingers down my face.

I watched his eyes harden as he dropped hand. "But then when I found you this time, you weren't alone. You had friends. You had him," he ground out, his eyes flickering with sick satisfaction when I cringed away from him. "I watched you with him. I sat there at night, knowing you were in here, fucking him, knowing I could walk in and kill the both of you. I liked that feeling."

"James, think about what you are doing," I begged him. I knew it wouldn't work. I knew he was too far gone for that, but I needed time to think, to plan.

"Oh, I have thought about it, Izzy. I have thought about it for years. I was fine when you were miserable and alone, you fucked up my life, you deserved to have no one, but then he proposed, didn't he? He proposed and you threw yourself into his arms the like whore you are and started planning a future with him a life. Why the fuck do you get a future when I don't? I had to leave my entire life behind because you didn't just fucking die like you were supposed to."

I felt my heart beating faster and faster. Each word he spoke the angrier he became and I knew I didn't have much time left. I needed to do something, anything, now.

"I didn't ruin your life," I whispered, trying to move away from him as he crowded in close to me.

"You didn't?" he bit out. "I was fine, happy, until I saw you. Until I gave you everything to have it shoved back in my face. I loved you; I would have given anything for you. And what did you in return? You dumped me and then fucked someone else. Did you know how many times that we were together that I wanted to pull those sexy little panties of yours down and fuck you hard? There were sometimes that I'd watch you bend over and think of all the ways I could screw you. I knew you'd like it. I knew you would like how it when I pounded into you. But I loved you and I knew you wanted to wait, so I did the right thing and I didn't fuck you the way I wanted to."

I felt my stomach turn at his words. I had been fifteen when I had met James. I'd had thoughts, but nothing to what he was describing. Mine had been idealized. There hadn't been details or actual thought; I had imagined it more to me a movie montage than an actual act. I shuddered at the thought of how differently things could have been if he'd crossed that line like he had admitted that he had wanted to do.

"I had to hear about it from everyone. My girl was screwing some fuckwit. You humiliated me. You had to pay," he gritted out between clenched teeth. "I had it planned, you know?" He smirked. "I was going to come into your room at night and show you what a real man was and choke the life out of you as I came."

I felt the wind knocked out of me at vile words. "You're sick. Crazy."

He just smiled. It was the smile that scared me. It wasn't happy or mocking, it was cold, predatory.

"I was about to come and get you when I had a better thought and decided to really teach you a lesson. I wanted to take away what you loved, you're precious family. And I did, didn't I, Izzy? I killed them right in front of you and it felt amazing. I have spent so many nights replaying your face over and over again as I slit your bitch mother's throat. It gives me chills," he chuckled.

"Your fucking insane," I breathed as I backed away from him.

"No. I just believe what goes around comes around. You hurt and humiliated me, Izzy. You took everything I had and pissed all over it. It was only fair I did the same to you."

"And now?" I balked.

I watched as emotion filled his eyes. It was grief. "My mother killed herself a week after I faked my own death. I had to fake it, I had to disappear, because you had lived to fucking tell the tale. You destroyed everything, again. So, I came up with a plan. I'd seen it done in countless TV programs and knew it would be perfect. I drove my car off a cliff and watched as it burned. Everyone thought I'd died that night, including my mother and she couldn't handle it. So she slit her wrists and she died and it was all because of you. If you had died then I could have gone back to my own life. When I found you this time, happy, in love, I couldn't begin to explain the anger I felt at you, Izzy. Why the fuck should you be happy? Why should you have a future when I have nothing?" He growled as he succeeded in backing me into the corner. "Oh, poor Izzy. You look like a trapped mouse. You should know better than to back yourself into a corner."

I felt the rage fill me as I slowly moved my hand behind me, blindly feeling along without tipping him off. "You know what I have learned tonight, James? That you are a sick and twisted freak. None of it was my fault. It was all you and your warped mind that destroyed everything that I held dear. Not me. Even now, you're still blaming me, still haunting me. There's just one thing that you don't know this time."

He smirked arrogantly. "And what would that me?"

I looked him in the eyes. I let him see my anger. My fury. "I won't let you kill me," I vowed as I gripped the heavy lamp and smashed it against his temple, feeling satisfaction at his cry of pain as I wrenched the door open and ran out into the dark, stormy night.

* * *

Panting, I ran for my car. I wasn't going to be the idiot who ran into the woods, away from her vehicle and away from safety. Id watched enough movies over the years to know better.

I froze with a sob as I looked down at the wet, muddy ground and saw all my tires had been slashed to shreds. I wrenched the door open, hoping that it would at least get me away from him enough to get help. Grabbing my spare key from the glove compartment and thanking god that I was paranoid about such situations, I stabbed the key in the ignition and turned. Nothing. The car wouldn't start and I knew. James had done something to the car. He was going to make sure I wasn't going anywhere.

Knowing I only had seconds I jumped out the car and fought the urge to panic as the freezing rain pounded down on me as I glanced toward the back of my house.

Edward had once journeyed through the woods, telling me that his house was on the opposite side of the lake. If I could get to his parents' house, I could get help. Edward had gone there after his shift; he would be carrying his gun.

My head shot toward the light as the front door opened and James stood there, glaring at me, blood dripping down the side of his head from the broken lamp.

It looks like I would be one of those idiots who ran into the woods after all, I thought grimly before I felt my determination sink in.

I could make it.

Without hesitating I ran past my house, throwing myself into the deep, dark woods, running to my haven.

My bare feet sank into the sodden earth as I raced through the trees, ignoring the pain as thin branches whipped against my vulnerable bare legs.

Of course I'd look like a slasher movie cliché, I quipped as I ran, almost slipping on the wet ground. I had been told that people tended to use humor as a way of coping with scary situations. They were right.

I could hear him behind me; hear him calling my name as he chased me down. I knew to him that this was part of his sick game. Tracking he had called it before. I knew now that that's what he thought he was doing. He was tracking me down so he could kill me once and for all. No way in hell was that happening.

Eight years ago, I had prayed for death. I had dreamed of it. Of seeing my family and being able to hold them close. But that was before. Before I had a life, before I had friends who had become my family. Before I had Edward and wanted to live. Before I wanted that future he had spoken of. I wasn't going to let James' change of plans destroy that.

Only once did I fall to the ground, calling myself an idiot for glancing around to see if I could see how close he was and knocking myself off balance. When I was back up, I didn't turn again. I ran straight, ignoring his calls, ignoring the sound of his pursuit, ignoring the pounding rain and wind. I focused solely on reaching the lake.

When I spotted the opening, I could have cried in relief, but my burning lungs wouldn't let me. Without hesitation, I dived into the icy lake and swam, thanking god for survival instincts. If humans didn't have such strong survival instincts then I couldn't have made it through those woods without breaking my neck. I couldn't have bolted through the dark, eerie woods like an Olympic runner or dived into the freezing lake without flinching.

I had watched a horror movie the once where the blond female lead had escaped her attackers and had plunged herself into the icy waters in an effort to escape. I had routed for her, proud of her determination as she ignored the bullets that were slicing the water inches away from her body. I had vowed that's what I would do and I would not break that vow.

I swam, never looking back, never slowing down. I wouldn't let my need to know how close he was ruining my chances at survival.

After what seemed an eternity, I came to the lake sure and dragged my tired, aching body out of the water.

"Edward!" I screamed up at the light house. "Edward!"

My next call was cut off as a strong hand struck the side of my face, sending me flying back into the water.

"Edward," I sputtered as James loomed over me, his hands gripping onto my head.

"Say hello to your family, Izzy," he hissed before dunking my head under the icy water, holding me there as I struggled.

I fought with everything I had, trying to break free, trying to get some much needed air, begging god to give me strength. To give me a break.

After a minute my body wasn't moving as fast as it should and I felt myself losing focus as darkness overcame me.

Through the darkness, I heard a voice.

"Bella? Bella, sweetie? Mommy's here."

**EPOV**

"Edward, stop watching that clock and just go home," my mom snapped when she saw me glance at the clock once again.

I turned to her with a sheepish grin. "You know what? You're right." I told her before I heard something. My head whipped around as I searched for the sound of Bella's voice.

Something was wrong.

I knocked the kitchen stool to the ground as I got to my feet and stalked to the back door.

"Edward, what's wrong?" Alice demanded as I searched the back yard.

"I thought I heard Bella," I hissed as I heard the others join me.

"Dude, I'm surprised you heard anything in this weather. It's just the wind," Emmett told me, trying to get me back into the house.

"No," I whispered, my instincts telling me that something was very wrong.

It was then that I saw a figure by the lake. "Get the women inside," I snarled as I ran out into the pouring rain, pulling my gun from its holster on my hip.

As I got closer, I could see a large male holding something struggling under the water.

"Move back," I snarled as I raced toward the dark figure, Emmett on my heels.

The male looked up and I instantly recognized him. James.

It was then I noticed that it was Bella in the cold water and she was no longer struggling.

My heart in my throat, I didn't hesitate to charge into the water, headed toward Bella.

James rushed toward me, a blade in his hand, but he never touched me. I pulled the trigger, blasting a bullet into his shoulder and sending him flying back into the water as I frantically pulled Bella onto the dry ground.

"Restrain him," I snarled. "Call 911!" I snapped as my family rushed down towards us and I searched for a pulse.

There was none. Bella had no pulse. No heartbeat.

"Bella!" Rosalie screamed as she raced towards us, her large blue eyes filled with tears as she tried to get to her best friend. Her sister.

"Keep them back," I snarled as I tilted Bella's chin back to clear her airway and began CPR. I didn't want her to see Bella like this. Cold, lifeless.

"You're not dead," I growled as I began compressions. She couldn't die. She couldn't let him win.

She couldn't leave me all alone.

"Is she alive?" Alice sobbed as she strained against Jaspers firm hold, trying to get to Bella.

I checked once again for a pulse. Nothing.

"Come on, baby," I encouraged, feeling the hot tears pour down my face. "Come on, you can do it. Just breathe," I ordered as I pinched her nose and blew oxygen into her mouth.

"Edward," Emmett whispered after a couple of minutes. "Edward she's gone," his spoke quietly, his voice thick with tears.

"No," I denied as I shook my head.

"Edward," he said again.

"No!" I growled my pain and fear turning to fury. "Come on!" I snarled as I tried to make her heart start. "Don't let him win, Bella. Don't you dare let him fucking win. Stay with me. Fight!"

I could hear the heart wrenching cries of my family behind me as they gave up hope. I didn't listen. She couldn't be dead. She wasn't dead. Not Bella. We were going to get married and move into her house in the woods with her cats and have a houseful of children. We were going to grow old together.

It wasn't ending, not like this.

"Bella," I sobbed as I pounded my fist onto the ground beside her beautiful face. "Please," I begged, pulling her cold, lifeless body into my arms, rocking her back as forth.

"Please don't leave me" I breathed. "I can't live without you. I love you so much," I sobbed. "Please, baby, just hold on. Stay with me. Just stay with me."

I felt my body shaking with hopeless pain and fury as I held the woman I loved in my arms and sobbed.

I looked down at her lifeless features and I didn't see them, but I saw her smile. The way she looked at me when I had introduced myself in the library, the night I had turned up on her door step. I saw those next few weeks, how our fragile relationship had slowly developed. I remembered our first kiss, our first dance. I remembered how she felt in my arms as we danced, as we made love, as I held her as she drifted off to dream in my arms.

No, I refused to believe that this woman, which her bright smile and beautiful soul could be gone.

I placed her carefully back on the ground and began CPR once again, hearing my mother's cries of sympathy as she watched me refuse to give up on Bella. I would never give up. I had never given up, even when she tried to push me away, tried to shut me out, I had never given up and I wasn't about to start now.

"Come on, baby, come back to me," I breathed.

Please don't take her, please don't take her, I repeated over and over again in my mind. Who I was praying to, I didn't know.

It was then, as if angels themselves had granted my wish that Bella choked up water and breathed.

**A/N**** Hi guys! So, what did you think?**


	22. Chapter 22

**A/N**** Hi guys! Thank you all so much for your reviews and your adds, it truly does make my day! Anyway, the next chapter should be the last... I know sad faces. To Kate Monster; I will never leave this story unfinished! Please review!**

**BPOV**

It was the annoying beeping that woke me up. What the hell was that?

Every muscle in my body ached and my throat felt like it was on fire. I was alive then, I thought dryly. Death would be peaceful and easy and this wasn't either of those.

I opened my eyes with a flutter as I tried to locate the source of the annoying beeping and then try to put together what the hell happened. The last thing I remembered was James holding me under the water and hearing my mother's voice, seeing her face... But then I had heard _his_ voice, the angels, and I had fought like hell to come back to him.

So where the hell was he?

"Baby," I heard a husky voice whisper from beside me.

Slowly, I turned to see the angels face. He was sitting there, clutching onto my hand and I felt like an idiot for not realising sooner. I frowned at the sight of him. He didn't look like my angel. His eyes had deep shadows underneath them and he was incredibly pale. He looked haggard.

He needed to shave; I thought when I used every bit of strength I had to trace my fingers across his jaw.

"I've missed that," he whispered, nuzzling his face against my hand, reminding me of my cats.

That thought stopped me dead.

"My cats?" I croaked out. "Are they okay? Did he hurt them?" My throat hurt with every word but I forced it out. Those cats were like my babies, they had to be okay.

Edward smiled my favorite crooked smile. "You would worry about them more than yourself. They're fine. Rosalie and Alice went to get some things for you and Alice found them snuggled up on Rosalie's bed. They're fine," he repeated.

"Good," I whispered. "What happened? Why do I feel like an elephant beat me up?" I tried to joke. His eyes looked so dark and haunted; I just wanted to see him smile.

It didn't. His eyes darkened with pain and anger. "You died, Bella. He held you under the water for too long. I almost didn't get to you in time. I almost lost you," he whispered.

"But you didn't," I pointed out.

He smiled at that, but I could see the guilt in his eyes, the fear.

"I know. I also know that you should get some more rest."

"I want to go home," I protested. It was true. Though that monster had broken into my home, walked along my floors, touched my belongings, it's where I felt the safest, even now. I was actually happy about that. After that night I hadn't been able to step foot in the house where I had grown up. I'm glad that wasn't the case. "Why can't I go home?" I demanded.

Edward took a deep breath. "Bella you inhaled some water. My dad wants you to stay in the hospital for a few days to make sure that you don't get any infections in your lungs. You're vulnerable to those right now, but my dad's put you on a course of anti-biotic to try and prevent them. The safest place for you right now, is here."

I sat there for a moment, trying to calm myself. I hated hospitals. The last time I was in one was after James' first attack. I had lain in that bed, staring up at the ceiling and wishing I had died.

Edward seemed to piece together why I was so eager to leave and brushed as kiss on my cheek. "You're not alone, Bella. I won't leave you here alone."

My heart broke at his words and I finally let the tears fall that I had wanted to shed since I had seen him walk down those stairs last night.

"Baby," Edward whispered hoarsely as he climbed onto the bed and pulled me into his strong arms.

"He's been alive all this time," I sobbed. "Eight years. He said he'd been watching me. I never escaped him, Edward."

He made soothing sounds as he held me. "It's okay. I know."

"How?" I demanded, gripping onto him. My safe harbor.

"James is in the hospital," he whispered and I felt myself freeze. "It's okay," he rushed to reassure me. "He's got two police officers outside the room and one inside where he is chained to bed. He can't get you. Turns out that once your home town realised that he was alive they sent out some guys to make sure he stayed that way until they could arrest his ass."

I nodded, feeling slightly better that three police officers and my very own guardian angel wouldn't let him get to me. "It was pretty big news at the time," I mumbled.

He chuckled quietly. "It's pretty big news now. Your house is filled with flowers, the phones been ringing off the hook since the news came out. Someone even offered you a book deal," he added brightly.

I couldn't help but smile. "I think I'd look good on a book cover. Especially in this sexy outfit," I joked, plucking at my unflattering hospital gown.

I felt my heart lighten when he laughed, his eyes finally losing those shadows that had been there since I woke up. "Speaking of which, you lied to me."

"What?" I frowned, thinking of what I could have lied about.

He nodded his head, his eyes dancing with laughter. "Yeah, you told me that you were wearing that sexy black teddy. Yet, when we got you, you were wearing my old t-shirt and boxers. That's not a sexy teddy."

I rolled my eyes. "Well, it's a good job since I would have died from exposure as I ran my ass through the woods in the pouring rain and was nearly drowned in the lake, which by the way I will never look at in the same way again."

His eyes narrowed. "Don't do that," he whispered. "I'm not ready for jokes about your close encounter with death quite yet."

I cupped his face in my hand. "Edward, it's over. I didn't die and James is going to jail for what he's done. Do you know how many times I cursed the gods, or whoever, because he got the easy way out, because he didn't have to pay for what he did? Well, now he will. He will go to jail and he will never see the light of day again and that makes me feel very happy."

"It makes me happy, too," he murmured.

"I fought back, Edward," I whispered, my eyes filling with tears. "I fought back this time. I didn't stand there and I didn't let him hurt me. I fought."

Edward leaned down and tenderly kissed away my tears. "I know. I am so proud of you."

"I saw them. My family," I whispered. I wasn't afraid to tell him, I knew he wouldn't think I was crazy or brush it off as a delusion. "I saw my mom and my dad. Andrew. They told me to fight. To not let him win. That they were with me. That they love me," I wept.

"Of course they do. Of course they're with you, Bella," he whispered, holding me close.

"I held them and they felt so warm and safe and I wanted to stay and then I heard your voice," I whispered, looking into the green eyes that I loved so much. "I heard you calling to me and asked me to come back to you. I didn't want to leave you. I wanted to come back to you and marry and love you for the rest of my life. So I came back to you," I shrugged my shoulders.

"Thank you," he whispered, kissing my lips softly.

"I love you," I told him simply. "I always will."

"Good," he grinned. "I have something for you," he told me as he dug into his pocket and tugged out a small velvet box.

I smiled as I realised what it must be.

Edward flipped the lid and nestled inside was the most beautiful ring I'd ever seen.

"Edward," I whispered. "It's beautiful."

"I was going to put this on as I waited all those long hours when I sat right on that uncomfortable chair and waited for you to wake up but I decided against it. I wanted to see your face as I put it on you. There's the look I waited for," he grinned when my eyes teared up and a smile lit up my face.

"I love so much," I told him as he placed the ring on my finger. A ring I would treasure for all time.

"I love you, too. It turns out that my family has a tradition. This was my mother's engagement ring and my grandmother's engagement ring and so on. And one day, this will be our daughter's engagement ring. You know, when she's in her fifties and she finds that prince she deserves," he teased.

"What if we have more than one girl?" I asked. "We're adopting children; we could have ten girls. What will you do then?" I laughed.

"Then we will have to get a huge remodeling on the house. You know, more bedrooms, more bathrooms, a huge fence to keep any horny teenage boys out. The girls can share the ring," he added absently, his mind pre-occupied with fences, I assumed.

I smiled. "A fence, huh?"

"An electric fence," he clarified with a satisfied grin. It made me smile to see that he'd thought of such things. To know that he was already planning how he would keep out teenage daughters away from horny teenage boys.

"You're crazy," I said with a yawn.

"And your tired," he countered. "Come on, you, close your eyes. You have been through a lot and you need your rest."

"You'll stay?" I asked, clutching onto his shirt.

"Where else am I going to go?" He teased as he kissed my forehead.

Finally safe in the arms of the man I loved, I closed my eyes fell to sleep.

**EPOV**

I came awake slowly, sighing blissfully at the feel of Bella safe and warm in my arms. I had been a wreck all night as I sat at Bella's bedside and waited for her to wake up. Wondering how she would feel, wondering about how she would be.

My father had warned me that all because Bella had begun breathing didn't mean that she wasn't out of the woods yet. That due to her going without oxygen for so long that she could suffer from brain damage.

It had been the longest night of my life. Waiting, wondering what she would be like when she woke up. If she even woke up.

After Bella had begun breathing the ambulance had soon arrived and taken her away. The paramedics had tried to convince me to travel with my family, but I had refused. I wouldn't leave Bella. I would never leave Bella.

In the hospital, they had wheeled her away and I hadn't been able to see her. It had driven me insane to be away from her. My mother had tried to get me to eat something, drink something, as we waited, but I had sat on an uncomfortable plastic seat and tried to breathe as my mother had rubbed soothing circles into my back. Jasper and Emmett had been comforting the girls, who were distraught over Bella's condition, worrying as much as I was over how Bella would be when she woke up.

James had been taken to the hospital, the police waiting for him. It killed me, to know that he was in the hospital, so close to her. He had almost killed her tonight; he had wanted to, he would have if I hadn't stopped him. I wanted to bastard; I wanted to hurt him as much as he had hurt Bella. I wanted to kill him like he had almost killed Bella. The only thing that was stopping me was that Bella needed me more.

It was strange holding her close and safe in my arms, knowing how close I had come to losing her. I vowed to myself that I would never take her or our love for granted. The love of your life, Bella, was too special to be taken for granted.

I glanced up when the door cracked open to show my family creeping in, trying to not wake us.

"Aw, look at them," Alice whispered.

"I know, Edward looks like shit," Emmett rumbled, then grunted when someone, most likely Rosalie, hit him.

"Thanks' Emmett," I growled as I opened my eyes to let them know that I was awake.

"Oh, sorry," he shrugged.

"Edward?" Bella mumbled as she opened her eyes.

"It's okay, sweetie. Looks like the whole family are here to see how you're doing," I smiled as I helped her sit up.

Bella looked over at Rosalie and her eyes filled up with heart wrenching tears. "Rosie," she whispered.

"I thought I lost you," Rosalie replied softly, biting her lip to hold back the tears that threatened to spill over.

"Rosie," she repeated as she held her arms open for her.

With a sob, Rosalie wrenched herself out of Emmett's embrace as threw her into her best friend's arms, though I noticed that she remembered to be gentle. Within minutes, Alice and my mom had joined them and the four of them sat on the bed holding each other, effectively kicking me out of it.

I stood back with Emmett and Jasper and watched them from the window at the sight that melted my heart. Bella, who had wanted nothing more than to be left alone, was now wrapped in the arms of her two best friends and future mother in law.

It was amazing how far she had come in such a short time. It amazed me just how much she had opened herself up to me and to the people I loved, who she now loved. She amazed me and I had no doubt in my mind that she always would.

**BPOV**

"I don't like this, Bella. You should be back in bed, not standing here. Especially not at this door," Edward growled as we stood in front of James' hospital door where he was still being held under twenty four hour guard until he was well enough to be held in custody until he could appear in court.

I sighed as I turned to Edward. It had been two days since I had woken up in the hospital to find him as my bed side. Two long and boring days where the only thing I could think of was the fact that James was in this very hospital.

Edward had been amazing. He was constantly making sure that I was comfortable and had everything I needed, or wanted. He stayed with me until the nurses came and kicked him out, only to sneak back in later and climb into my bed, holding me when my nightmares returned. What I found amazing though was that the nightmares weren't as bad as they had once been. I didn't wake up screaming, blindly attacking anyone in arm's length. I was upset, yes, but I didn't hurt anyone. I didn't hurt Edward.

"Edward, he is on the other side of that door. I have to talk to him."

"Why?" Edward burst out. "Is it answers you're after, because you can't get sane answers out a fucked up crazy person, Bella."

I had to bite back my smile. He only ever really swore in front of me when he was upset.

"Edward," I began, hoping to calm him down.

"You're still recovering after what that bastard did after the last time you 'talked'. I don't want him anywhere near you, Bella. I mean it. You get your ass back to your room and in bed where I know you are safe."

I couldn't help but smile at his firm tone. Here was this big, strong man, with a kind heart and beautiful soul and he was all mine. I don't think there would ever be a day when I wouldn't be in awe of the fact that I have him.

"Edward," I whispered as I reached up to hold his face in my hands. "I have to talk to him. I have things that I have to say. Things that will haunt me if I don't. Trust me, I need to do this."

He sighed as he turned to kiss my hand, his shoulders drooping in defeat. "Fine, but if he says anything to upset you I'm going to gouge his eyes out."

"Yes, sir," I replied sarcastically and then turned to the nice policeman who stood guard at James' hospital room.

As I walked in I felt my nerves try to get the better of me. Though I knew I needed to do this and though I now knew I was free of him, the man still scared me. He had destroyed everything with his convoluted reasoning and my family had paid the price.

I had to admit, it was strange to see the demon from my nightmares handcuffed to a bed and wearing the unflattering gowns. It made him seem more human.

His eyes glared into mine as Edward and I came to a halt at the end of his bed.

"What are you doing here?" he snarled.

"Watch it," Edward growled. It was strange for me to see him look so dangerous. Edward was my safe harbor. The one place where I knew I would always be protected. It was kind of unsettling to see the man who had always been so soft and tender to me, look like he would gladly reach into James' chest and rip his still beating heart out. I had to admit it was also kind of sweet at the same time. Edward was a professional and I knew that he was trained to be calm and collected, even detached, in situations like this. It was nice to know that when it came to me, there was no calm, no detachment.

Knowing this gave me the courage I needed to go on. "I have things that I want to say to you."

James smiled coldly as he let his eyes roam over my body. I placed a calming hand on Edward's arm. I could feel the muscles underneath were tense. He was ready to move if need be. I got the feeling that since James was handcuffed it wasn't an attack _from _James he was ready for but an attack _on _James.

"What do you want, Izzy? Are you going to stand there and beg me to tell you why?" he asked in a mocking tone.

I clenched my fists, trying to hold back the anger. Even now, he showed no remorse. Even now he was cruel.

Part of me did want answers. I think I always would. Part of me would always wonder why he crossed such a huge line. Why he had done such a terrible thing. It was then that I looked over at Edward and remembered what he had said to me only moments before we had entered this room.

I looked at James and this time it was my voice that was mocking. "No. You can't get sane answers out of a fucked up crazy person."

I saw Edward smirk from beside me as he clutched my hand in his.

Taking a deep breath I took a step closer, Edward shadowing my every move, placing himself slightly in front of me. Protecting me.

"I have wanted to see you suffer for so long, James. I wanted to see you behind bars; I wanted to see you burning in hell. I spent eight, long years just dreaming of what I would do if you hadn't been such a coward and drove off that cliff. I never thought I'd get the chance," I shrugged my shoulders. "But, since the police officer over here won't let me gut you and I won't let Edward go to prison for gouging your eyes out, I'll just say what I need to."

James rolled his eyes. "Please just get this over with."

"Shut up," I snapped, shocking him. I had never defied James, even when we were dating; I had never spoken to him that way. Well, a lot had changed since then.

"James, you talk too much. You have too high of an opinion of your own self-worth. You wondered why I dumped you and left you with nothing? Take a look in the mirror. You are controlling and cruel and violent and you deserve to be a lone with no one to love you because you don't deserve love. I tried to love you, I tried to be what you needed, but no one can match up to these expectations that you have and don't deserve in return."

"Shut up," James snapped at me this time. I could tell me words were getting to him. James had always needed everyone's undivided attention and unconditional love. He didn't like it when I pointed out that maybe the reason why he didn't get it, was him.

"I hate the name Izzy. I'm not an Izzy. No one ever called me that, but you just had to." I looked at him with disgust in my eyes. "Did you know James that I have spent eight years blaming myself for what happened? I blamed myself for everything. For not being who you wanted, for not making it work between us. For being the reason why you broke into my house that night and murdered my family."

"It was your fault," he growled.

I shook my head as I spoke what I knew now to be the truth. A truth that had taken a long time for me to even see. "No. It wasn't. It was you're fault, James. You were the one who beat up Jacob and tried to control me. It was you who hit me. You were the reason why I ended our relationship. It was you that decided that instead of hurting just me, you'd hurt my entire family. It was you who killed them. Not me. This was all about you. I don't expect grand answers that will make me understand why you did those horrific things. I'll never get them. I will never understand why you killed my family. That's for you to deal with in that bat shit crazy head of yours."

"You're only saying this because your boyfriends in the room," he spat.

I looked down at him. "I'm done, James. I am done wasting my life on you. You're not worth it. You are a pathetic, needy, weak excuse of a man who has a vile mind and cruel soul and I hope you burn for it, but I won't give you what you want. I want waste my life, or even my nightmares on you."

I could see the fury boiling in him and it did give me satisfaction that this time _he _was the one who was helpless.

"You've lost, James," I whispered. "You haven't killed me like you wanted all those years ago. I'm not alone like you want. I have friends and I have family who love me," I smiled thinking of my family who were always in my heart and the family I had made for myself, who were of the heart. "I will have a family of my own and they'll grow up with love and laughter and know nothing of what you are. When you are alone at night, wishing you had someone to love you, I will." I said, looking up at Edward. "You've lost, James. You will never win. I won't let you."

James hurled his body at me, but the chains restrained him. As did the police officers.

"You stupid bitch," he growled. "Do you think this is over? It will never be over! I will be in your every dream, every nightmare. Every time you hear a bang in the night, you'll wonder if it's me. You think that you can get away from me? I'm inside you, Izzy!" He screamed as Edward and I left the hospital room.

Out in the hallway, Edward turned to me and smiled. I had to smile back, despite the situation I felt like a huge weight had been lifted off me.

"Well, that was interesting," Edward drawled. "Did you say what you needed?"

I smiled up at him. "Yes. I have finally told him what I had wanted to since I was fifteen. I want move on, Edward. I have held such guilt and shame and anger for so long and I just want to move on," I whispered as I wrapped my arms around his waist.

Edward just grinned down at me. "You sure?" he teased.

I looked up into his eyes before pulling him down into a hot, passionate kiss that was full of love and sensual promise for when I was out of the hospital.

"I'm sure. I love my family and I'll miss them every single day, but I want a life. With you. With the family that I have here with me now and the one we'll make of our own. I saw my family, Edward, no matter what the doctors say. They want the same thing. I want to live my life. With you."

"That sounds like a plan," he agreed with the most beautiful smile that made the sun, the stars and the moon look drab in comparison.

"Let's go home."

**A/N**** So, what did you think? Bella finally got to say her peace and James is chained to a hospital bed. Good times! Next chapter will be the last...**


	23. Chapter 23

**A/N**** Hi guys! As I am writing this, I have just posted chapter 22 and haven't even wrote 23 yet, LOL! But, I was reading over some of the reviews I have gotten for this story and, though it is kind of dorky, I couldn't help but get a little misty eyed. This story originally started out as a thing for me, a place to lose myself in, like a lot of my stories. I liked entering my own world where two people meet and fall in love. Those of you who have read my previous stories know I don't have much patience for love triangles or too much 'Will they? Won't they?' I like to read about two people finding each other and making it work. That's what this story became for me as my characters in this story don't have the easiest of pasts and both have their own demons. Originally Aidan and Tilly, I turned them into Edward and Bella because I wanted to share this story with you wonderful people and, while reading the reviews, I was overwhelmed with how much love I got from you all. How interested in the story you all were, even when you didn't agree with the characters actions. So, as I sit here at 2:06am and write this very long Authors Note, I would like to thank you all for reading this story and being such wonderful people. I hope to write many more Twilight Fan Fiction, but this one had been incredibly special and it's all because of my beautiful readers who take time out of their day to read my story. Thank you!**

**BPOV**

"Here it is," I whispered as I looked up at the house where I had grown up in.

"It's beautiful," Edward murmured from beside me, his hand in mine.

It was strange to see my old house in the light of day, so many years after the night that had changed everything. The last time I was here I had needed my brown paper bag and a good sedative, now I was fine. A little nervous, a little heartsick for my family, but with Edward's hand in mine, I knew I could face it. I could face the building that had been a representation for the worst night of my life.

"You want to go inside?" he asked quietly.

"No," I replied. "A family lives there now. A happily married couple with four young children who have no idea what happened in their house. I don't want to bring it up and remind them that three people were killed in their living room. I want that house to be for those children what it had been for me when I was young. I want it to be their sanctuary. A place where they can come and feel safe and warm and loved. Nothing else."

Edward wrapped his strong arm across my shoulder and pulled me to him. "It will be," he promised.

I smiled up at him, still feeling that sense of awe that I had him. That he was mine.

"Come on, let's go. I don't need to be here anymore." And I didn't. Like James, I had needed to face this house. I had needed to be able to look at it and face what had happened here. My therapist had thought it was a great idea. He was proud of my progress with my past and my demons.

Edward smiled as he tugged me toward the car and held the door open for me to climb in, kissing my forehead before closing the door. His therapy had ended a while back, when Edward had finally come to terms with what had happened that day. Edward had finally come to realize that he had done everything he could.

This hadn't only been my trip to face old demons, it had been Edwards also. We had travelled to Chicago to meet with the husband and father of the woman and four year old Tammie.

_'Are you ready for this?" I asked as we stood on Craig Jenson's front porch._

_Edward looked down at me, his face was pale and his entire body was tense with nerves, but he nodded his head and knocked on the front door._

_A man a little older than Edward opened the door with a welcoming smile. "Mr. Cullen, how are you?" He greeted us with a friendly smile._

_I could feel Edwards shock and realised that he wasn't expecting a warm welcome. I knew that he had come expecting Craig Jenson to be angry and hostile and unforgiving. _

_"I'm fine. You?" He mumbled, obviously at a loss for words. I think he would have preferred hostility. _

_"I'm very well, thank you. Please, come on in," he said, holding back the door for us to precede him._

_"Come on," I whispered, tugging him inside. Edward had come to battle his demons, to face his nightmares. He couldn't stop now all because it turns out that the person he feared wasn't a demon after all._

_We were seated in Craig's comfortable living room, when a woman walked in. She was taller than me, with a round figure, long auburn hair and pale green eyes that were soft and friendly. _

_"Oh, hello," she greeted us sweetly as she walked over to stand next to Craig, who was seated in a leather recliner._

_Craig made the introductions, Edward introducing me to both of them. I saw the woman's eyes widen before flickering to Craig's when she realised who Edward was. Craig smiled slightly at her before shaking his head in reassurance that he was okay._

_"So, Edward, why are you here?" Craig asked curiously as Melissa, his wife, took a seat next to him. _

_Edward glanced at me nervously. I felt my heart ache for him. On the outside he looked calm, confident, but I knew the inner turmoil that he was suffering. I noticed how his gaze kept flickering to the fire place where framed photographs sat of a young girl, who I knew were Tammie. She was beautiful._

_I placed my hand on his leg, squeezing gently to let him know that I was here for him._

_"I came to apologize personally for your loss. For not being able to get to your wife in time. Or your daughter," he forced out._

_I saw the sadness that filled Craig's eyes as his eyes, too, flickered to the photographs of Tammie. "I miss them every day," he whispered. "I don't think a day will ever go by when I don't," he smiled sadly, pain filling his eyes._

_"I'm sorry," Edward whispered painfully._

_"Why?" Craig demanded quietly. Confused, until dawning lit his eyes. "Edward, you can't think that their deaths were your fault. It was those monsters fault. Those bastards killed my daughter and my wife, not you." Craig's voice was kind but firm and the sincerity in his eyes was impossible to ignore or question._

_"You don't blame me?" Edward whispered incredulously._

_Craig smiled ruefully. "If you had asked me that at the time, I would have said yes. I blamed everyone back then. I was grieving and in so much pain, but I understand now that there is no one to blame but the people who did this. Not you. I have spoken to people who there, who saw what you did. Who saw how you tried to save my daughter. How you stayed with her. How you held her," Craig choked out, his eyes filling with heartbreaking tears. "Because of you, my baby wasn't alone when she died. I can't express how grateful I am to you for that. How grateful I am that you did everything you could to save them."_

_Edwards's eyes were filled with pain and with hope as Craig thanked him for what he did that day. He had braced himself for accusations and recriminations, not gratitude. "I wish I could have," he muttered, tears rolling unabashedly down his cheeks._

_I leaned into him, wrapping my arm around his waist, wanting to take away his pain. I knew I couldn't though. Edward past had made him into the man he was today. Just like mine had._

_"How did the two of you meet?" I asked Melissa, giving the men some time to compose themselves._

_Melissa smiled at me. "I run a support group for those who have lost someone and are grieving. Craig was dragged there kicking and screaming," she smiled. "I lost my husband and my daughter in a car accident. A drunk driver collided with them and they didn't make it," she explained, grief filling her eyes as she looked at the picture next to Tammie's. The little girl looked a lot like her mother and looked like an angel._

_It was then that I noticed the picture of a man and a woman and I knew then that this couple, who had come together in grief, included their deceased loved ones as well as their children. I respected them for that. So many people couldn't live with a picture of a dead husband or wife on the mantel, but Craig and Melissa understood each other's grief, shared it. Not many would._

_"I'm so sorry about your husband and daughter. What were their names?" I asked softly. _

_"John and Cassie."_

_After we had spoken a little more and enjoyed one of the best iced teas that I have ever had, Edward and I made our way to the door, promising not to be strangers._

_Once in the car, Edward turned to me with bright eyes. "He doesn't blame me," he whispered hoarsely._

_"Of course he doesn't. Edward, anyone who has ever met you knows what a good man you are. I don't doubt for a second that Craig and Melissa know that."_

_Edward leaned over to kiss my lips tenderly. "Thank you for coming with me."_

_"Always." I promised._

"We're here," Edward announced as we pulled up outside our next destination.

I felt my breath come more quickly as my heart pounded. Seeing this, Edward pulled my hands into his, holding them to his heart. It always calmed me to hear his strong, steady heartbeat. I had no idea why it worked, but it did.

Smiling, I glanced down at the silver wedding ring that was on his finger, showing the world that he was mine.

It had been two years since Edward and I had gotten married by the very lake where I had almost died.

As the sun sank across the lake, our family and friends sat on white deck chairs and watched us take our vows. Alice, Rosalie and Esme how out done themselves, the wedding was more beautiful than anything I had ever seen. Candles and rose petals made up the aisle that I walked down to officially become Edwards, though I had teased that I had been his since the moment he very inappropriately hit on me in the middle of the library. Mrs. Tucker agreed that he could have picked a better place than the library.

Jasper and Emmett, Edward's best men, had walked Alice and Rosalie, my bridesmaids, down the aisle. Each couple had looked like they belonged on the cover of a wedding magazine as they walked arm in arm, making every man and woman there jealous of the beauty and grace. It was just a shame for them that both couples only had eyes for each other.

I had decided to walk alone down the aisle, not wanting anyone to replace where my father should have been. I had gotten half way down the aisle and saw all of my new friends and family looking at me with such love, at the man who would lay down his life for me and nearly broke down when I saw the photographs on the small table that sat next to small gazebo where Edward and the priest was waiting for me. Three enlarged pictures of my family sat there, surrounded by candles. It was so touching that the girls had remembered how important it was for me to be there, how much I yearned for them to be there and I had almost broken down, the pain of their absence was so strong.

Before Edward could rush forward, Carlisle had gotten smoothly to his feet and placed his arm around me.

_"I know I'm not your dad, Bella, but I see you as my daughter and I hope one day you will also. You don't have to do this alone. Please allow me the honor to step in for your father, just this once," he whispered with a small smile._

_I looked up into Carlisle soft, loving eyes and realised that I didn't have to do this alone. My dad wouldn't want me to walk alone, on today of all days, out of fear that I would be replacing him. Carlisle stood there, offering not to be my dad, not a replacement, but to become one to me. To be there, to hold me when I cried and protect me and to walk me down this aisle and hand me over to the man who loved me and who I loved more than anything. _

_"I'd like that," I whispered as I linked my arm with his and walked down the aisle to my future._

"What are you thinking about?" Edward asked as we got out of the car, walking around to the hood to link hands once again. I loved that about him, he was always at my side, holding my hand. A partner that I knew would always be there.

"Our wedding day," I smiled up at him.

He chuckled. "It was pretty special. Especially when Lauren showed up at the reception. I thought that Alice would claw her eyes out."

I couldn't help but giggle at Alice's fury due to Laurens presence. It had taken Emmett and Jasper to hold her back when Lauren appeared at the reception, Tanya right there with her.

I hadn't been bothered, I was blissfully happy in Edward's arms, watching the whole thing unfold in front of me.

Lauren was tall, blond and seemed to be the exact opposite of Alice in every way. Alice all but radiated love and warmth and laughter. Lauren seemed cold and aloof. I doubted that even I would have believed Jasper slept with her. He would have got frost bite if he touched her.

It had been Rosalie, in her silk dress that clung lovingly to her curves, who had strolled over and told both women that if they didn't leave in the next three seconds that she would personally kick the shit out of them. That no one was going to ruin this day for me and Edward, especially them.

As the girls stormed off, I noticed three long scars that marred Laurens neck and wondered aloud what had happened to her. Alice had laughed evilly and wiggled her fingers with pride. "That's all me, baby," she chuckled as Jasper leaned down and kissed her temple. The two of them had gotten married two months before us and hadn't been able to pry themselves away from each other since.

"Did I tell you that Tanya is engaged?" Edward laughed as he swung our hands between us.

"No way!" I burst out. "What happened to her waiting for the hot young Sheriff, huh?" I teased.

Edward threw back his head and laughed, the sound reminding me of sunshine, bright and warm and beautiful.

"She heard that my heart had already been stolen away," he replied.

"Good," I answered as I wrapped my arms around his waist and made our way over the grass.

It had been a wonderful two years. I had gone from being uncertain of my new family and friends, to being a central part of the group. Rosalie, Alice, Jasper and Emmett were always at our house whether it was for a barbeque in the sunshine or movies and pizza during a cold winter night.

The same thing was with Carlisle, Esme and even Mrs. Tucker, who had constantly nagged me to hand over my cats who had taken quite a shine to the woman who had welcomed me into the town.

The only bad thing was due to James. He had been sentenced to life in a mental facility after his lawyer had claimed that James was unstable and he wasn't in his right mind when he had attacked my family. I had been outraged, I had lived in a mental facility for two years, and I didn't want anyone in danger of being around him. I had been after blood until the prosecutor had informed me that Volturi Mental Facility in Arizona was for people like James, people who killed and then claimed to be clinically insane. James would spend the rest of his days locked up. It wasn't prison, but it was still something. The psychiatrist who had declared him clinically insane had promised that he would never be to hurt anyone else like he had me and my family. Id actually felt guilty after that for the anger I'd felt towards her. I had remembered reading a book where a man had killed children, thinking they were demons and it had been the female lead who had to go against her own wishes and declared that he wasn't fit for trial. It had cost her reputation and her blossoming relationship with the leading man had been put under tremendous strain because of it. It was only once she explained that it was her duty to do it, that she went against her own instincts, that she continued to visit him in the asylum where he lay restrained to a bed, screaming as demons attacked him, just to make certain she was right that he finally understood. I wondered how many times the woman in front of me had been judged unfairly because she was only doing her job.

I smiled when I saw the group of people standing at the grave stones. My family. Both of them.

Today I was finally introducing Edward to my family. It was long overdue, but it felt like now was the time.

Emmett and Rosalie stood close together, an engagement sparkling in the sunlight as her hand rested against her rounded stomach. In three short months we would be welcoming a new addition to our group and we were all excited to see how the child would turn out with such strong willed, hard headed parents as Emmett and Rosalie.

Alice smiled as she made funny faces at the small toddler in Jaspers arms. Cynthia was two years old and had her father's looks, but her mother's bright, crazy personality. That was something I noticed about Alice after she and Jasper had reunited. When she had been alone she had always seemed solemn, even when she smiled, but when she opened herself up to Jasper again, she opened the floodgates. Alice was a ball of energy, which was good considering she was already pregnant with their second child. Jasper looked at his wife and daughter like the sun rose and set with them.

My gaze didn't stay on my friends for too long though; it flew to the small girl who laid flowers on my parent's grave.

Renesmee was three years old and was the most beautiful thing on the planet. She was small for her age, due to complications during pregnancy. She had long copper curls and big brown eyes and held an uncanny resemblance to Edward. I often teased him, asking if he had something to tell me.

"Mamma! Daddy!" She squealed as she ran recklessly over to us, a bunch of daises clutched in her tiny hand.

I felt my heart soar as I leaned to scoop her up into my arms.

It was hard of me to think of this little girl not existing, to think that she almost hadn't made it through pregnancy and then later on as she struggled just to survive. Her birth mother had been a drug addict who had no need for a baby. She had given birth to a baby who was addicted to heroin and left her without a second glance.

Edward and I hadn't been married for long and were already in the process of trying for adoption. We had both wanted a family as soon as possible. That's when they had told us of a year old baby who didn't have a home or even a name in New York and needed both desperately. We had fallen in love with Renesmee at first sight and did everything to get her.

When she had come home, her nursery had been ready and waiting and so had her two parents, who already loved her more than anything.

"Daddy, look!" She said, thrusting out the daisies and nearly smacking him in the face.

Edward lifted her out of my arms and held her close to his chest as he spoke enthusiastically with our daughter. Gazing at her as if she were an angel sent from the heavens.

Sometimes, seeing them together, I had to pinch myself, praying that I wouldn't wake up alone in my house with only the cats for company. I always felt the sting of tears when I didn't. When I realised that this was really my life. That I had friends and family, a husband who I would die for and I had a daughter who we both would.

As we walked over my families graves, I couldn't help but feel strangely happy. I had never been able to come here, I was too afraid to face them. To face the guilt and shame that I felt. To face the fact that they were truly gone and that I was alone.

I wasn't alone anymore. I was greeted with hugs from my dearest friends, my family, who had travelled from our home in Sugar Grove to meet us at my family's graves to support me.

With a deep breath, my hand firmly in Edwards as he cradled our daughter, I turned to my family.

"Hi guys. I know it's been a while, but I'd like you to meet my family." I smiled at the words as they filled my heart with joy.

I had a family again. Finally. And I was so lucky to be alive and to have them and I would never take that for granted. Family and friendship and love were the only things that truly mattered in life.

And that was one thing that I would never be without again. I had my wonderful husband, beautiful daughter, friends and family and three psycho cats and they were all mine.

**A/N**** HI guys! Well, there you have it. That's the end of the story. It was really hard to decide how I should end it, but I liked the idea of it being about family. Bella's family.**

**I have enjoyed writing this story so much and I thank you all from the bottom of my heart for reading.**

**Kayleigh**


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